25 - This Is Not A Drill

Alright, that fits my mood right now, I think as I start toward it, but shouldn't we be crowning this off with the Waifu? Can't be the Master Sword after if I'm Zelda, after all, and you'd better not take Sis' fun.

(Link, James Link, is my not-secret pet-name for Sis, with her secret agent fu, love of cool toys, and having to rescue me constantly)

The Dreams show me Lavos in silhouette, but--right duh that's from the proper Secret of Mana for the Nintendo Playstation.

(Yes, Secret of Mana. In the real world that and Chrono Trigger are one huge, sprawling, action-RPG masterpiece, with a neat multi-character combo system that takes skill to use but is oh so satisfying when you and your handmaidens and dolly pull it off....anyway)

Time for a boss parade. First stop: BRRRRRRRT!

I flounce out to it, and tentacles are setting us in the cockpit and strapping us in and closing the canopy in no time . Everything's off, but I can remember how to start it now--

Game are you just saving time, or do you not like me using the ladder for some reason?

Your game has more reasons, but time is a big one.

Oh, is this what we turned into a time machine to steal Bombshell? Anyway.

Batteries on. APU start, wait for the RPM to come up. APU gen test, good, APU gen on, fuel pumps on, engine start, wait for RPM to come up, APU off, battery off, flaps, check, waypoints already up on the HUD which (very naughty of me to not power down the avionics right before), hands on controls, Boobsong on lap, brakes off...

"Let's rock and roll."

And I firewall the throttles. We're airborne no time, and I bring the gear and flaps up, get a good cruise speed of 250 knots, and line up the first waypoint.

As we close on the first waypoint, something fades up over the engine roar...

That sound. Your Boobsong feels angry fire! Let's do this come on where are they!?

It's an unending, unwavering, unfading trumpet blast, so loud it's the only sound even in the cockpit of our jet fighter. The sound is even and stopless, but I can hear the deadly words in it: CLEAR THE WAY!

My voice, when my own inner guardian stood in my way to save my life by raising my rage, that first time we saw the shores of Limbo after.

The waypoint is here. The next is up and to the left, so I follow it, add throttle to ascend. It's still pitch black outside, but I can feel the rush building. Just give me something to blast, and I'll show you a clear fizzfrozen way.

The next waypoint is going to be a level right turn, but it's a way off.

There are lights now, ghostly up ahead, like Will-o-the-wisps--OH SPARKLER TREATS JINK!

I roll us out of the way just in time to avoid cannon-bursts from two ghostly-glowing, skeletally translucent X-ray A-10s with their canopies missing like the pilots ejected, except I'm pretty sure I can see their skeletons still strapped in. There are dozens of lights up ahead and the waypoint leads right through this!

I roll back the other way, looking up for our foes, find them and try to draw a bead but they're already slipping behind. At least I was too much of a bimbo to safe the gun before I landed! What is this! My poor handmaiden!

Flaps down stand on airbrakes turn hard and wingover for a bastardized hog-stomp GOT YOUI They swing into view and some fancy rudder-work plus a moment of chainsaw-roar I can barely hear over the trumpet tears them both burstingly from the sky, raining down pieces of eerie blue fire.

I put us back to normal flight configuration and firewall the throttles--if we have to be this high there's not point staying slow--and get back on course to the waypoint.

There's a whole ghost war up here, flaming-phantom tanks and SAM sites and even little specks of soldiers floating on an invisible battlefield. They all seem to have one enemy, us. I pick off a ghostly surface-to-air missile site, swing to get the tank nearby, trying to clear a space around the waypoint. There's no further air support so far, though I can see flying ghosts in the distance--good. That was lucky with those A-10s, that could have been way harder. The A-10 can dominate against much faster and more advanced fighters in a dogfight, but to do it you have to use your low-speed ability and the ground itself as weapons, neither of which you have against another A-10 and when the ground is a ghost!

Clank, under my feet--HEY! If I have to fix one single bullet-hole--it's just small-arms fire, by the sound, but still. I pitch down, find the ghostly solder--oh shit. What is this place.

He's got up like it's WWI, and drawing a bead with a bolt-action rifle. Alright well I bet this will be better than your current existence. BRRRT, and to vapor he returns. A quick glance around shows nothing in the air--wait--the waypoint rushes past--that's the rotor-top radar of an Apache lurking behind that invisible building there. I just open fire and blast through its cover, and it more thundering sparkledust erases it.

The whole thing is freakish. Only the combatants seem to exist, but each I see looks like it has its own sense of what the battlefield is, to the point of being able to take cover behind what no-one else can see, so the overall place is just a crazy-quilt of arbitrary nonsense.

Waypoint. I turn for it, and up ahead there's a giant green-glowing silhouette of some freakish steam-powered battleship even that particular kind of anime would say was over the top.

Tanks ahead. I don't know my tanks, ironically for someone who owns an A-10, but this column looks WWII. I blast them before they can do anything, then slam down-elevator to miss a Spitfire that seems to come out of nowhere, oddly doesn't fire, wait, that wasn't a ghost! I look back to see it turning, outlined in a white nimbus instead of the ghosts' blue. It's coming around to follow our course, or at least also head for the battleship ahead. It waggles its wings, friendly, so I waggle back. Definitely not complaining to have an ally, but what the hell on what the hell?

The radio! Stupid me not even wearing a headset because I'll just get my eardrums back next time I make out with Boobsong--okay the radio can wait, because that AWACS plane with its huge radar dome up ahead is definitely a ghost, and I bet getting rid of it is in our interest, to say nothing of its crew. It's already so close, and the huge converted airliner is a massive target, so I send it a short burst, and it disappears in flickering antimatter explosions.

Now, if this was a videogame, that would do something epic. Has it? I look around at the battlefield, and see the ghosts winking out like stars at the end of the world. It was calling them up from whatever damnation they hover in, to fight again. How is that not what I just did to Kaari and her army?

The Dreams show me what looks like a chess knight at first but is actually a real knight riding a huge muscular black horse rimmed in white fire like the Spitfire that's doing pretty good keeping up with my three hundred knot charge. The knight is a green-and-white shining Power-Suited Strawberry soldier, and both they and the horse look like they're filled up with that fire so much it's leaking out of their outlines. They're off to war and somehow in the vision I can see the wicked grin behind the visor, but they're alive, riding out because otherwise the fire inside will burn them and everything around them, while the phantoms we're blasting are dead, sad ghosts trapped in battle forever.

I can say that because that's how I feel right now. I take another look out at the spitfire, but pay attention to Sparkledust's wing, and sure enough, anime-styled every-wavelength flame rims it, too.

Only when I look back inside at my hands on the controls in front of the cockpit lights' eerie green and the glint on a scythe flashes through my mind do I understand.

Clear the way, I said.

Alright well this isn't a role I ever expected to find myself playing but trim midriff or not these curves would definitely qualify me as a fat lady and you sure will think it's all over if I ever sing, and this horse was even chloros before Boobsong and me got at it with the glitter-gun.

More. Where are they, come on. I've still got plenty of photon charges, bring me the Sharkticons! If my handmaiden's out here let's find her by sheer statistics, that seems like a good way to do it.

The battleship's coming closer, huge and phantom-blue with green between its smokestacks, but nothing else seems to be around. The waypoints seem to go up and either over it through the smokestacks or alongside it off to the right, it's hard to say which at this range. A waypoint rushes past and I adjust course, the next one's coming soon, we're being guided quite precisely for some reason--another, already. I turn again. The next will take us up--whoops, time for it, bank left and line up.

We're around by the rear of the battleship up there, and there's an orange-lit platform on the back of it--because fire. People are running around with firehoses, but it looks hopeless. It's like there's an aircraft carrier deck between the thing's smoke-stacks but it's made of wood and on fire, and just too big to put out.

Waypoint, turn, being carefully bent toward this. Don't see the Spitfire, did you see where it went, dolly?

It's up behind us. Six o'clock high.

Oh there you are. If you're up there on purpose I'm definitely not complaining about the cover.

 They must be able to see me looking, because they wing-wag again, so I grin and make a peace sign at them and then wing-wag again--oops, waypoint! I turn again, we're definitely lining up like for a landing approach on the battleship, though it doesn't seem like it'll be a very good landing approach vector.

This close, I can see tiny little 1920s firetrucks trying to put out a huge bonfire blaze in the middle of the platform, but while the ship looks ghostly, these firetrucks look real, like the Spitefire and Sparkledust--and does the fire and wood!

Just what the hell is going on here. Another waypoint, turn more, part of the approach vector's mystery is that the ship is underway and going pretty fast. We'll be lined up nicely to fly right...along...

Okay being a grim reaper in an A-10 and my scythe is 30mm antimatter shells which also just technically directly makes me a Valkyrie being as its soldiers I'm calling off to Valhalla is about as metal as our day has been going, and blasting damned soldiers free of the hell of endless war sure is satisfying, and I can guess how this gets my handmaiden out of trouble, but would someone like to explain why the firefighters are catgirls in maid uniforms? I mean that's--wait a minute--holy fizzfrozen twinkie bar sundaes on a melamine countertop, those are books burning, the fire's in the middle of a pentagram, and they're not uselessly trying put out a fire that big, they're hosing down the people they're pulling out of the fire.

Okay I'm coming. One fireproof star and dragon pair coming up. Down. Just let me land, it looks like there's plenty of space on the roof or deck or whatever between the smokestacks--yes, because you have a full-on runway down there.

And here I thought this ship would be something awful. I think this might be the most beautiful thing I've seen in the Four Dreams yet. Just let me land it's a little hard while I'm crying is all.

So reader, if you're not a history buff, not that I am. Nazis and that whole book burning thing. I'm sure they lit up whenever they felt especially bigoted, but the big fire, the one that's in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade among other things, was the library of the Institute for Sexualwissenschaft, which among other things studied hormone therapy and did some of the first full top and bottom surgeries. If you were trans or queer in the 1920s and early thirties, Germany was a pretty great place to be, at least near the Institute. After that, well, there's its library burning, down there, but those catgirls down there on that anime-fascist battleship are using it to do what may be the most beautiful and completely metal summoning I've ever seen.

Remember how Candy rode terrifying wars right into whatever corner of Valhalla the Chyajjoh and some very scared Gorean Starfleeters--oops waypoint--were playing Star Trek Online in? This is like that. I don't think I need to explain the problem with Nazis burning books and the problem with burning books in general is it's not books anyone's ever actually burning. That's a really powerful symbol, and a really powerful ritual, burning that library, so somehow down there they've summoned it up and are using that moment as a ritual stand-in for every moment somebody burned one of their books as a gateway into that hell that stretches all across time and space...so they can reach in and pull people out.

If my handmaiden's in there I'm marching straight in, and if she's not I am anyway, because if I'm going to get diverted this will do it.

Okay but isn't like the fuhrership and the catgirl maid uniforms and stuff all a little...bad, and/or stereotypical? I mean lots of trans girls do like the cat maid thing, but...that's the point. They're riding stereotypes and nightmares to get as close to the extraction point with their platform as they can, to open the portal as wide as possible. It's just like the holiday rituals people do let me and the other holidays conflation-jump to everywhere somebody's hung up a stocking or put out Sugarfeast tulips or lit the Openveil lights spooky enough, all at once. They're trying to touch every place somebody who'd be written about in an Institute for Sexualwissenschaft is being burned they can, and these symbols loom over the twentieth century like those smokestacks are starting to do as I descend according to the waypoints. I'm only surprised to not see swastikas--oh because black crowns of thorns on red hanging banners will broadens this nicely, yes, just like up here on whatever ragged edge between Valhalla and hell we just fought across is the place to do this. Gravel between your toes, ladies, I'm impressed.

Still too high for flaps and gear, but we're lined up now, so I throttle back, start shedding speed, remember to safe the gun this time.

Jump machine online. Dragon form enabled. No lust required this time.

I see you're paying attention, seed-ghost--game--

Do it. Your game will take everything back for you. Put your crown on!

Light shining on the canopy shows me it up there above my head. I reach up and jam it in place with both hands, and cartoon logic holds it fast--although I suspect the next thing to see us isn't going to think cartoon in its last moments of existence.

How much space is good, dolly?

About two hundred feet.

Alright, here we go--and there goes the last waypoint, because I know what we're doing now. Six hundred feet AGL, catching up but not there yet, dive!

When we hit two fifty--to account for the height of the ship--I level off and line up real good, and as the fire passes out of sight beneath the nose, flip us inverted and stomp the airbrakes and throttle to nothing and open the canopy. Heat and a horrifying smell I won't think too much about hits like a wall and I stare right into the blaze and see stuff I can't make out but looks even more horrible than burning books and then the moment is right and the tentacles let go CLICK.



The flames are a doorway to a world made of flame.


The way her thoughts roar so deep and terrible and her cry of conflation-jump echoes as it spreads into millions of us everywhere, standing by stellar consciousness and ontological engineering that even makes Uncle Dagon dizzy on a million billion moments and places at once, all sharing the nature we've just dived into, the hellfire-portal I've just been describing.

It burns, oh yes, this is the heart of the inferno, the moment of burning-out-up I bet you've been in at least once reader if you got this far through anything I write, a world of darkness and licking flame choked with black smoke.

Land, dragon. Stuff is in the way, smash it.


Tail lashing everywhere destroy everything BRAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

Rubble Flies. Abstract with capital letters that's the only way I can describe it to you. My stellar mind thinks all this makes perfect sense, even as my human visual cortex just flipflops, glitched.

There they all are, standing, staring, lying in pieces, hunched over shaking, screaming because the fire's already taking them.



Boobsong seems to fan into billions of herself, tongues going everywhere. Yeah. She'll be here somewhere. Maybe they both will. By pure statistics, let that be the way. Let the numbers be in our favor for once.

I sit up straight on Boobsong's back and inhale. Brimstone and burnt plastic choke my lungs but so what. Time to test something. I have theory, you see. If you think you can't fight fire with fire, it's because you didn't use enough.

Let every every wish that they'd just all be okay, let the aching pain of wanting that someone had done this for me, shine out, but with kindness, not rage. Let them see it everywhere.

Flames are Blown from Surfaces as everything flares shimmering rainbow every-wavelength, but the light doesn't burn. People stare straight at it and gape, those who can stand.

I pull a fine choking bit more breath in, and let rip the gift of Royal Voice of Command Boobsong's nectar has given me:


My voice booms out as thick and multiple as every Borg ever, and, I hope, as kind and hope-bringingly passionate as I feel.

Those who can run, charge, walk crawl, climb Boobsong's legs, tail, haunches, even catch her lashing neck as she licks up more and more.

Only when you can't fit one more, dolly. Only then.

Better keep calling out more then, before we run out of people to save!


Oh my screaming apocalypse sundaes on fire, are we running out of people!?


Mommy that's it, your dragon can't find anyone not already riding her! EEEYAAAAAAAAAH POING!!!!

G-forces slam me and my laughter at just how apocalyptic that poing was and the people crowded around down to her soft back as the world blurs fiery and we shoot upward as Boobsong flaps it can't be all of them that's impossible but even with my star-sight this sure does look like it. Another flap and the ship shoots down past us and something weird happens with the conflation-jump spreading everybody out of what seems like thousands of miles well I guess it would have to be we did not there's no way but I think this is enough people yes. Boobsong's come back from her supernumerosity (conflation jump isn't technically copying, it's temporarily detaching from the idea of number) and we're flapping in place now, but the sky is just full of them, everywhere, standing on nothing or cradled in clouds or meeting loved ones who appear from nowhere in as many ways as there are people. Some look our way and wave or blow kisses, and one by one they all disappear to better Dreams than this edge of hell until the sky--the conflation-jump collapses the rest of the way and there they are, both of them, riding Boobsong in front of me this whole time. The one in front is small and has brown hair, and the one in the middle is a little bigger with red hair. My arms are around them in a flash and I lean to say in their ears:

"Don't freak out. You're safe. We'll figure out everything. We're going someplace nice now."

They both just sort of hunch. The front one holds onto my hands, good. We're not in the Painted Sea, so nobody's toonshaded, but they're inexplicably wearing Princess Calla dresses from Gummi Bears--whatever, they're here.

Dolly, I can't even. You--we--well I guess we sure did never shoot where we could use grenade this time, huh?

Sure didn't leave a single BoB dead!

That's for sure. Good job, Acme Station. Good job. Let's go home. Can you find the way?

Conflation destination set PRAH!


...and we're on the runway in front of the nicely-parked Sparkledust.

"Hold still," I murmur to my two stock-still handmaidens, and then click.


AAAAAAaaaaall BIP dolly.

My handmaidens look around wondering as we sink to the runway and Boobsong flows out from under us and becomes a doll in my arms again. My arm is still around them, so I give a squeeze, and carefully let go, ready to do whatever if they run, but they just step apart a little, keep staring around silently.

"How are you feeling?"

I make my voice as gentle as I can. They both turn around. Here in the Painted Sea, the taller, red-haired one looks like she stepped off a Rider Waite-Smith tarot card, while the smaller one is one of those winter paintings with the glowy lights--shining prettily in her eyes, in her case.

"My arm hurts but I'll take that to where I was. How'd that huge machine become your dolly?"

It's the redhead, curious and bright-eyed.

"What's with your arm, show me. My dolly's magic, which is also how we're all cartoons--your eyes are fine. How about you?"

I look at the shorter one, but she's looking at her hands--

"Why am I a Thomas Kinkade painting!? You get Disney but I'm just Thomas Kinkade. That's mean."

Okay, engage I know perfectly well how this works but I refuse to dignify that by understanding it. Confused face. Glance at redhead, who seems okay really, and isn't presenting her arm.

"What's wrong with Thomas Kinkade? The castle's oils a lot like his style."

This sends tarot girl on a holup-spree of looking around again.

"He's all...stupid heartwarming paintings for grandmas blown up twice their size so you see dots when you look close at em."

I grab her hand, peer close at it.

"What're you doing?"

"Checking for dots. Hmm, nope. Maybe I should do my microscope thing, make sure you're the original."

"What do you mean? Can I be copied? AM I one?! Maybe you should check, here! Do it!"

"Relax, you're the very first you, I promise. For real though. I'm Disney animation, you got me. If you're stupid heartwarming paintings for grandmas--um, actually if you say something like that one more time you're probably going to find out a whoooooole different meaning to for grandmas--anyway, Disney, what's Disney who's it for."

I start to gently fidget Boobsong's nipple while she answers:

"Um, like, little kids, and--I mean--"

I twist hard suddenly to get Boobsong moving.


What a perfect little squeak for this. I look down at Boobsong in my arms.

"Oh? Whaddaaya think Boobsong the Succubus, are we for little kids?"

I grab her boobs tight as she answers.

"If we put on clothes and--oh that's right, have to only wear Starlight Princess stuff, and she's not for kids anymore!"

Light-in-her-eyes stares, bright-eyed and open-mouthed, at our antics.

"There's all different Disney Princesses with all different things having like animal companions or talking to silverware or being a mermaid or whatever. What if there's one who's thing is that she's super horny and incredibly kinky? Wouldn't that be fun? Come on, what do you want do to with Thomas Kinkade? Maybe he should be Thomas Kink-aide when it comes to you? You're not blown up double-size, so your art looks awesome, now what're you going to do with it? I mean it doesn't have to be a sex thing, that's just me kind of making everything horny because obviously I am the Disney Princess I was just talking about, but I have to admit a Thomas Kinkade orgy would probably look pretty awesome on my dungeon wall--hold up, do I have one!? I think I might have one! I've gotta go look for that anyway this is the Painted Sea and your art style says something deep about who you are but it's up to you decide what, little miss light in your eyes! You know that's where you got the light, right, like you should probably check your nipples too because that's where would wanna glow but it really is looking so pretty in your eyes."

How did I just do that, and also this is horrible strategy, but I just can't do the ease-you-out-of-Christianity thing anymore, and I just have to have faith the Dreams arranged me to get the two who could take it back after I snap.

Tarot girl has found the monolith, and is at the battlement, looking at it--good, distraction.

Light-in-her-eyes looks like she's about to try and peer down her bodice, then looks at her hands and arms again.

"Starlight...keep telling jokes like that! I know something and your humor's reminding me!"

AAAH! UMUMUM no chill dolly.

"I mean what do you think, dolly, all kinds of  possibilities with oil paining, right? That orgy painting sure had some happy little trees in it!"


"Rembrandt the one where it's all dark and you're glowing from your mouth? Really illuminated that man yous dicked!"

"I'm getting the impression you forgot I'm a Lesbian, dolly! I mean let's not count my blue period--I was a boy for a while," I explain to light-in-her-eyes, "made me really blue. I got better, obviously. Even avoided inventing Cubism!"

"That's what you say, but this Boobsong watched you get boxed like five times that night!"

"What can I say, I like to work with a tight canvas. I have to say, though, Sis' boyfriend might've been named Jackson, but he sure wasn't the one swinging brushes, oh no, it was Sis who got my pole-off. Cause Pollock. Get it. Yeah me neither."

"She was amazing! Like a tide of pink and white explosions when you came from that scene in the Waifu! Really anime-ted you that time!"

"Holy gummidicks I could go for some strawberry ice cream now. You know dolly, from that place with the white bowls with green on them? Anyway romance advice, light-in-your-eyes, never ever get hen-pecked when you can get hen-tai'd--and Sis sure tied me good that night, didn't she, dolly?"

Light-in-her-eyes is laughing raucously now. Banzai!

"EEE that place! Your Boobsong loves that place! You should see the menu, it's thousands of flavors, all right there in the open! You're right though, she had a way of making sure your eyes closed after the doctor checked on you. Really made your mouth wet, being choked that way! You were a dandy whore-hole she thought, your Boobsong could smell it!"


Light--shiny--fabric silk. Silk? Satin. Uhm. She claps her hands to her mouth to cover her exclamation.

"Holy fizzpopping flatline fruit-roll-ups, that was a knockout! She really--I mean that dildo! Let's just say the name of that soup cans painting should be some assembly required. This is supposed to be fine art, though, and it's sliding into doctors. Let's put the Hieronymus kiBosch on that, yeah? It'll be hell to follow this routine, otherwise!"

"The doctor sure slid into you, but that was her arm, Mommy! She just couldn't keep her hands off your line--or your balls, those either. That was the most relevant your dolly could think of for that joke. So much for you Boobsong's perfect streak. She must have been lost in the ice like that Thomas Kincaid painting."

"Starlight--Rainbow! Rainbow what's happening where is this!?"

"YES!" I grab Snowlight into a tight hug and finish the routine:

"Dolly, I think you put the light right where it needed to be."


Hug so tight. She squirms and I let go but she just wants to look up past my boobs.

Kiss me, her face says, so I lean down and do, and she kisses back real hard with warm little lips, puts her arms around my neck and tries to climb up, catches her skirts around my middle, falls back, looks at herself like why the hell am I wearing clothes. I seem to remember climbing was standard procedure for her because she's short.

"I'll explain everything, don't worry. Sum up you got lost in hell and we rescued you along with um, everyone else there I think maybe. But we were coming for you two. Everyone else is inside. Figure out where we are yet?"

Damn right I'll enjoy doing this seven times.

Snowlight looks up, then looks at me, face intense.

"The Painted Sea. And I'm not journeying."

She swallows.

"Yes. This is it. Welcome home. Figure out what home yet?"

"Rl'yeh Sade, obviously!"

I gently put my free hand on her head and turn her until she can see the monolith.

"Gummi orchards, that's--"

Her head tries to move, so I let go, and she turns all around, looking.

"You tricked me with this runway and Sparkledust! I thought this must be Heart Home, with the Spaceship Club!"

"Nope! So, talk about your stay in hell, or forget it for now?"

She whirls back to face me, eyes wide, but says nothing.

"You're safe. It's--"

Instantly hugging tight again. I think I remember her being one of those people who knows full well the have the build that makes you think they're a kid while not making you not think they're an adult (all my handmaidens are nice and breasty, for instance).

I pet her head. She just hugs. She's about the same size as Boobsong's girl-form.

"Better question. What kinda booze or nog or hot chocolate thing?"

"Buttered rum please. Make me forget I just wanna be stupid now."

"Holy bubblegum heels if that's not an everliving mood. Here. Fucks you up good and as soon as I say you'll be dumb as a post--I need you just a minute longer, to help the last one. I'm sorry. You're the only friend she has right now--everyone's memory got wrecked, mine included."

As I talk, I step back and hold out my hand and bubble up a hot buttered rum with a side of peacefully unthinking bimbo potion that'll last until she sleeps it off (or I antidote her) and without any silly nonsense like diluting the rum. She snatches it and starts chugging.

"Okay, stay close, but enjoy that."


Warmly capped aah.

You're so cute. You make me feel warm.

Tarot girl is still checking out the monolith, but she turns around when she hears us coming.

I hear an aah and glance at Snowlight to see my game taking her glass away as she licks her lips cutely. Good girl.

"I guess your arm's not too bad--"

"Starlight is some kinda memory thing. Makes you remember. I heard you saying it. I've been saying it, but it's not happening. I heard the jokes, and you talking, but I still can't remember this. I know that I'm missing it because I can feel the hole in myself, but I can't find the things that go in there."

See how impressed with you I am right now. See it. Hardcore. Go you.

"We'll get you back. Do you believe we know each each other, and that you're safe here?"

"Yes. I heard the other friend--you, hi, sorry--make out with you. Are we lovers too? I don't mean to be presumptuous, I--"

Stupid worked the last time. Probably should have been stupid the whole way. I come up and put my arm around the small of her back and french kiss and oh hello you're enthusiastic with your eager little tongue pushing in, that's very hot of you! I dance with her soft lips, licking her exploratory tongue-tip happily, then pull back breathing hard making sure how awesome that was is plastered all over my face.

"That was wonderful, but I still don't remember you."

"You sure remember how to kiss! That's your answer, though. This is tricky because my memory's messed up too, but I had the instinct to clown for Snowlight here, and it worked. Speaking of which, Snowlight, go inside and find the others and then get stupid. Everybody else is in there. My door's around the left side of the tower-top there."

She squeezes me, and heads off.

"Am I stealing your friend? You're in a weird position but if you kissed that way you can't be too scared of me."

"I don't feel scared at all. This is home, I know that, heart--yow!"

"Oh those are the meanest. For me it means I'm trying to remember in too serious and grown up a way when my real self is the silly bimbo you just saw making jokes at Snowlight there, but the key is probably different for you. It just means you're getting pinched on the shape of what you know when what you have that's probably tender and vulnerable is another shape. Anyway, I was saying, maybe it's just your art-style, but my instinct with you is--okay if me being scatteredbrained is going to do it you'll be back in no-time. Before I show you this, any guesses why you got the art style you did?"

She looks at herself, then at me, serious.

"Pamela Coleman Smith Tarot deck. My favorite."

"Yeah. Now why the snarlygrape sweetpotato pie wheels of fortune is my occultist friend the one having a hard--oh. Okay. I'm being coy to not remember for you because the more you can do the better for you, it's like physical therapy. I probably should have been more coy about the lovers thing but I couldn't take it, I'm really into you apparently. So I've been helping friends escape the clutches of Christian hell, at least they think it is all night, and it's been rough, but not as hard a time as you're having. Why's my occultist friend having such a bad time. I bet you can figure it out. No big if not, just trying stuff."

This is sure making her come back to me. We loved working through esoteric puzzles like this together. Boobsong and her--is that right? Of course I think my succubus should be all magical, and she's no slouch, but...I think that's this girl actually. Huh.

Tarot girl taps her lip with a finger, then her face lights up.

"They all have horrible upbringings! Christianity's a nightmare to them! As soon as you gave them a place that would break them out of it, they came screaming like their hair was on fire. I'm harder because I'm brought up a witch. I see this place, and say wow, the astral plane is awesome! My heart feels yours beating hard for me. The only thing I'm missing is my factual, episodic memories. Even your succubus companion is cute to me--though that dragon shapeshift is something else! Did we escape number to bring all those people with us? Where was that place! The Christian hell is--I mean it's not real, right? Some father spirit isn't watching over this waiting to send me back for my wicked ways?"

"I remember you. You like this stuff to fuck your mind, don't you! Look up. How much space up there do you think a monotheistic god could manage to take up? If he really went all out."

She stares straight up, laughs a short laugh.

"Alright, that's that fear allayed."

"Mindfuck the second, let's put the hell thing to rest. How many people have to have the same nightmare before it's not myth anymore?"

"You mean Christianity created hell. Oh my fuck that's terrifying! How was I there!? I'm a cradle witch! I had my first athame at seven!"

"I have only guesses, and I don't want to go into them unless we have no other way to fix your memory. More mindfucks? Something hot to drink to go with them?"

"Yes please to both! Can you just make anything? Are you a harvest goddess? It's something, I feel that--OUCH! There it is again!"

Hurry. I make myself an obnoxiously artificial strawberry hard candy right in my mouth, come up close and make sure she'll smell the strawberry over Boobsong's grapesplosion, and breathe in her ear, "Not every sacred thing springs from the earth or grows like a living thing," clacking the candy on my teeth the whole way.

I stand, grinning so I want to pop to see that face that knows an occult riddle when it meets one. She chews it like I'm chewing the candy now.

"You're a goddess of candy! No--yes? RRRRH my heart screams when you make candy sounds!"

Clutching Boobsong with my arm, I hold out two big handfuls of wide-open, just-show-her-an-interesting-good-time candy, practically falling off.

"Go ahead. Freely given."

She looks at them, but doesn't move her hands. Smart cookie.

"That isn't dangerous, but...I'll have a wild time, if I take one of those."

"Now you're getting somewhere. Do you know what kind?"

"Very strange stuff will happen to my--body--and mind? It's a way to get...out of my viewpoint...but it really works. You might not be ready, you warned me that, the first time I ate a piece. You were right, I said, and asked for another one. There's a tour bus, behind you, in my memory--hey, I remember that! What's a goddess need a tour bus for?"

"Have you noticed my other car, yet, really?"

I nod over my shoulder to Sparkledust. She looks up at it, heads over that way, so I hurl the candy over the battlements to spice up someone's Heartwarming, and follow her.

"The A-10 Warthog is--wait a minute, I'm the only one here to be a witch from the cradle and maybe--OUCH!"

"Your schema's the wrong shape for the truth inside you. Where're it hurt? Can I possibly have this airplane? Maybe this is a riddle, I mean look, it's a videogame."

She peers at the wing near us, close. Not being in a rush, I can see we've taken off most or all of the hardpoints for bombs, which probably explains why I stomped those ghost-A-10s so easily: Sparkledust will be one of the lightest A-10s flying. Tarot girl's voice is very curious when she answers,

"It's texture-mapped--what's that word? I remember this stuff because you taught me! You're what...technology, not it, you like it...escalation. Change. Change! Progress and change! You like machines because that's the Earth--AAH!"

She looks so frustrated.

"Okay listen. This is awesome, but I'm remembering you, and...I think I should offer this choice. I think we can keep going like this, calmly rationally figuring out each riddle and putting each brick back into your wall I was drawn on...oooooooor..."

I come slowly closer, letting my irises glow in that ambiguous way that could just be Sea-light, lean close like I'll kiss her.

"....I can bend you over and fuck your mind over and over and over and over until your heart cums so hard you remember everything, and we can do it riding across that sky up there to the top of the Perfect Isles and down to the depths of the Deep Haven and I can show you the real astral plane where stars live--"

I light my whole self up gentle golden daylight, not so I'll hurt to look at, but definitely bright. Her mouth opens wider, but she stands her ground.

"-- and we can do it all in this one night even if that takes a thousand years and when we get back they'll all be waiting for us and we can watch a Christmas Carol in whatever movie version ever you want even ones that're lost to history though I personally recommend the my little pony one, and you can sit there with a hot drink in your hands that's as much or little of a wild ride as you ask me for because I'm in a very generous mood tonight and you can laugh until you beg me for healing candy for your aching sides at how fucking boring Scrooge's spirits were...but it won't be the smart way. It won't make sense or get your memory back the quickest and safest. The only thing I promise and I say this with absolute sincerity meaning happy and fun and lifegiving and soulhealing for you, it'll be the fun way."

She's breathing hard, just standing there, and then she leaps up and kisses me with her probing little tongue again and I make myself hot, not burning, just unnatural, then break the kiss and step back two steps.

"Shall I take that as a vote for the fun way?"

She just puts her blushing face down and nods, smiling awesomely.

Okay Dreams can we work a demonstration of how safe she is into this?

They show me a catwalk. Push her off the edge--ooh. Okay. Gulp. BE VERY NICE!

"Follow me."

I grab her arm and lead her over to the end of the runway behind Sparkledust, position her facing me near the unguarded edge.

"Lesson zero. Basic safety."

And I shove her off the edge with both hands.

Or rather, try to. They go not-through her like Sex's cleaver and my fingers. I clamp her with my glare instantly, intense and terrible.

"Reach behind you and take my hands and then look at this. Careful, you're right on the edge."

Eyes wide and panting, she cranks her arms behind herself, reaches up, I move mine down a little so she can reach them, her hands find mine, her palms are sweaty but she gets a shaky grip and holds tight, trembling, and, to her credit, looks down at my arms going not-through her without touching her while being in the same space.

"Do the whole riddle, and then we move."

She gulps, but thinks.

"Your arms and my chest are--this is impossible--not like going through each other they could be insubstantial all kinds of ways, it's impossible. There your hands are, holding my hands, through my body, but your arms and my torso aren't in the same space, I see one and then the other but never both...how's this happening...we just escaped what human beings think logic is. What's that mean for this...what would happen if I fell off of this, I'd fall and die, but what would happen here, I'm in the astral--wait. You're a star. The real astral is where you live. This is human paradise. I remember! When happy stuff can't come from things, they just don't happen here! When logic fights with that, it loses, like it's losing here! No matter what we do with this, the one thing that won't happen is falling off this edge! You tricked me with that careful thing! Okay, we're moving, that's the riddle, right?"


And I take my arms out from through her and bear-hug her as tight as I can push us both off the edge, let us drop a scary half-second, and flumph my full-birght wings out, and flap back up high above the runway as she squeals and holds onto me. I flap us over Sparkledust, so comfortingly hog-shaped below, grin to myself thinking how my candy hog is still a billion times less scary than Grandma's, and land us right in front of it where I can hang from the gun and lean my head against a barrel thoughtfully as Tarot girl catches her breath.

"So what changed?"

"You have wings! I didn't know that, but you did! Paradise can scare me, if it's happy! That was awesome! Show me something else!"

"Wellll," I purr, snuggling Sparkledust's cannon like I'm trying to multitask cock-worship and chitchat, "fair's Fairy. You do me, now, but you'll need a little more than an edge to make the point with me."

Game pppplease?

Here she goes!

Tentacles hold up a flight stick with a big red trigger on it, in front of Tarot girl. She stares at it, wide-eyed, looks at me lolling my head against the gun barrels, puts a hand up, almost takes the trigger, then shakes her head.

"I'll be blasted as much as you are! Blanks or not, that thing'll smash our heads to pulp with shockwaves--you taught me that. All about this airplane. Said I needed to learn fearing metal--AAAH!"

I can see your schema's hole would be clever to say here, but somehow, it doesn't even seem fun-mean. I wince for her instead. Game let's be nice now.

"That looked bad. I think we need to get back to that hot drink thing. What'll you have? No scary stuff this time."

I even stop being weird with Sparkledust's cannon, and give Boobsong a cute kiss on the top of her head to get my dolly on, because I'm surprised to find that one was--no okay I'm still traumatized from trying to push my handmaiden off a cliff, and then actually doing it (falls scares me, bad, which is weird for someone with wings, but falling isn't flying I guess). Maybe no more games like this right now.

"I'll take eggnog with nutmeg. AAH! Oh my fuck, it's just eggnog!"

I hold out my hand and bubble her up a completely normal eggnog, with nutmeg on top. It comes out in a somewhat worn stoneware diner-mug.

"Totally mundane just eggnog with mundane nutmeg. Not even interesting enough for a cool cup."

I grin ironically as I say this. She takes it and sips.

"I know why that hurt you. Have a good drink and then my pink friend will hold it for you if it's feeling helpful."

When she stops drinking, a tentacle takes the mug for a moment, she looks up at it, bemused.

"My life includes tentacles. They're very nice and extremely polite unless you're me."

"Do you have a tentacle fiend companion? No, it...that's...a machine? Somehow? AAH it's that same one! My schema's wrong with machines somehow!"

"Not bad. Okay I know what we're doing next but we're taking the fun way. Ready for the next lesson? No falling off stuff or artillery that violates the Geneva Convention if you use the wrong bullets this time."

She just nods.

"Lllllesson one. When they're not being used to oppress you, and never can be again, stereotypes are totally fun. So, witch, how ya gonna get skyclad?"

Tarot girl blurts out an ironic laugh to hear this--is her name just--no, too specific. Hmm.

Game nice generic one pretty please?

Tentacles fit a handle into my hand, and I hold up both hands, letting our binding hold Boobsong to me.

"The easy way," I hold up the bodice ripper so she can see what it is and how it would work.

"Or the fun way?" I hold my other hand palm-up and make a screamingly bright thread of every-wavelength from it.

"Remember, I was totally going to do it with the gun."

"You mean you were going to let me! Fun way!"

My game takes the bodice ripper, and I cross my arms over my head, and--

Okay so I'm totally about to make lightsaber sounds as I turn my light on, right? PSSSHOOM and slice her dress off.

"Set phasers to yum!"

Like hell. That's way not stupid enough. Game fun collateral damage please? Another silly-ironic laugh from Tarot girl gets quiet real fast as I slash two ragged handfuls of every-wavelength laser across her front so her dress is just destroyed entirely except a silly silhouette that falls down behind her beautiful, pale, freckly, soft, shining in the Sealight skin.

"Whoah. Um, you'll...want your eggnog..." I make a show of not taking my eyes off her body as my game hands the mug back to her. She stands there, holding the mug tight, not blushing exactly--oh no there she goes hehe.

"Okay. Just got skyclad. Call up your inner aunt great aunt Gertrude and ask her what witches do next after this part on a moonlit night? You know, Christian aunt Gertrude, black sheep of the family!"

"Um...dark magic. Gay sex. Lots of gay sex."

"Definitely inevitable. Threesome with a succubus is how I hear it usually goes."

I snuggle Boobsong with both arms, very dolly-like, and Tarot girl actually just looks hornily at her. Good for you! Happy grin to see you make that face!

"Where do they do such things? Tell me when you get the riddle here, not that it'll stop me."

"Oh, under moon and stars at midnight on midwinter. Which it feels like. Is it the solstice?"

She looks hunted, like she's expecting pain.

"Actually yes I think. Huh, I thought that would bite you, too. Interesting. So like, outside in the cold?"

"Yes. Using dark magic to warm themselves--"

"As if! Hottub's thataway."

I point past her, and she turns, holding her mug carefully, head thrown back in a silent laugh, and I come up behind, but she waits until I'm right there, and then dance-grinds against me and Boobsong both as we head along the battlement around my tower.

"TA ta ta TA, TA ta ta TA, TA ta ta ta TA ta ta ta TA ta ta TA," I whisper the Starlight Princess theme rhythm as we dance.

"Where are you taking me? That's journey-drums!"

"Right now, the hottub."

And I arm-in-arm her up the steps and into the water, get my usual spot in the middle with her beside me.

"Figure out what's wrong with nutmeg?"

"I think...nutmeg's--OUCH! Yeah okay, my schema for nutmeg can't fit it somehow? It's just--oh! Journey! Nutmeg's a journey herb! You have something with--AAAH OH MY FUCK!"

"Okay new rule. All swears from you must now be silly. Cuss it up, but less oh my fuck and more holy spiking clitwaffles or fizzfrozen cumdrops. Yes this is helping you."

She puts her empty nog mug on the tub--well, starts to, before my game takes it, and gets properly supersnuggly, unprompted. It's nice have an aggressive one. Never wondered if she was interested...

I put my arm around her, down to her butt, she gives that horny face again.


She trails off like she's handing me her leash--gladly. Though I'm starting to get the how do I involve Boobsong-s.

"To answer your question for real, usually there's a place people go when I sing that song to them, but we can't do it right now, for a reason that'll make you smack your forehead when you realize it. So, instead, let's do us a tarot reading. We're off to visit my Uncle Dagon in the astral, but first we need to know what you should say to him to get maximum fun out of this."

"Your uncle Dagon."

"You called it, I'm a star, just because most of us are asexual and parthenogenic doesn't mean we don't have family ties!"

"Your uncle Dagon. Like from the Lovecraft mythos."

"We can go see my Auntie Lucifer instead if you'd rather, but she just lives here in paradise, don't even have to climb out of the looking glass, it'd be a much less interesting trip--although you could see her and me play shadow puppets, that usually impresses people."

I see her face, is that starting to get knowing?

"I swear to you on the all Dreams of paradise I'm dead serious about everything I just said."

"Your Auntie Lucifer!? You have be making this up on me--oh. I feel--that's not fun, here. Family is hard for you. You wouldn't make these up. You like them, but--AAH."

"Yeah that's a really hard one, if you were going where I think you were."

The Dreams show me a fireman's jacket. OkaaaAAAAAaaaay...

"He's rescued now. All better. I did it the other night. He won't be calling, paradise won't let him or won't let me or something but it's right. It's weird, like, he's totally Picard after Best of Both Worlds, but I guess that doesn't unhappen everything, whoever wanted what."

"Yahweh. Your star-dad is Yahweh."

"Yeah, but I don't wanna talk about my daddy issues. I think we're trying to fix it but it's going to take centuries, so, yeah."

She swallows, but is quiet. I feel weirdly choked up, can't get in gear to change topics.

"What's your star-name?"

The Dreams show me rocket engines now, surprising me. Huh, if you say so...oh but do it scifi.

"Hypergamma-to-Radio Ultrabrilliance."

"You're riddlin' me again."

"That's literally exactly how we say it in stellar language."

"There's an English way to say it, that's not all, sciencey--"

"When you can see the poem in the way I just told you, your airplane headaches will stop, and I'll tell you what you just asked for. Either that or we'll trip over the button that makes you remember everything suddenly like a movie. Which has happened tonight, remember."

"Your sciency thing doesn't fit my witchcraft schema. You're trying to break me out of...the youthful confusion of Earth for good and outside for bad. You're outside the Earth. You came from the astral. Nature is a part of your world, not your world a part of nature. You have things that aren't part of Earth that are your sacred stuff! You're the external reality breaking into closed systems! Sugarfeast you called it! CANDY BECAUSE CANDY IS A SUPERSTIMULUS THAT BREAKS NATURAL SYSTEMS! Your candy changes people because Sugarfeast is the transforming holiday! It--writes over Ostara!? Wow, that's heavy, no wonder my head hurt! To say Earth has changed Ostara changed into candy fun instead of fertility to keep going the next year. We don't need all those people, we've got plenty, but we don't have the outside influence Earth needs to...escape itself...what's escape itself, you can't escape your own being...unless if you're a planet and the people go to paradise which you were on Earth to open a door to if you could get enough power which is why the tour bus! You were touring for worship! Well you got mine, Sugarfeast goddess! Oh but we're here now. Does that mean you did it? Why was I in hell then!?"

"Something really weird happened. I don't know if I did it or I'm dead or what. Earth hit some kind of--I don't know. Bad stuff. You and the rest of my family got thrown into hell. I'm not sure why, except maybe it was your escape route and the plan was I'd come find you ASAP. It...like I want to tell you everything, but I feel like I'm picking around this minefield of stuff I'm not ready to know or something--weird for the Sugarfeast goddess, right?--and like, it hurts or feels bad a lot like you're dealing with and I'm trying to just enjoy my time in paradise whenever I'm not doing something like rescuing people I love from hell. I guess I'm having my fun way, too, or trying to, but I'm really messed up inside and it's been a lot of hard emotional work getting back together and now we're here and I'm just like you are so much fun and having a fun time putting you back together the fun way. Oh um, awesome job, that's Sugarfeast, yeah, you nailed it so good I just kind of went on to the next thing."

"You're really an actual goddess. I'm sitting here in your hottub wrapped around you like it's just another--ano--AAAAH! Now what, my love life!?"

"You're involved with the Sugarfeast goddess. Your love life least of anything is going to fit schemas! Look at me carefully, how's my own schema-fitting going?"

"Well, you have that collar on--holy fizzfrozen...popsicle...warmers...does that mean you're Boobsong's companion!? That's her mark of ownership, right!? Yeah, I remember, this whole big thing, you...wait, but you nipple-tortured her into playing ventriloquist's doll for you, that doesn't AAH! Head I know yes this is not fitting my schema! Okay if you're the Sugarfeast goddess nothing you do is going to fit schemas. I won't be able to find who's the dom and sub in this. What else can you be, then?"

"Hmm, better do something kinky before you just figure this out. We are going the fun way here."

Before I can do anything with Boobsong, though, the Dreams show me a very mechanical-looking bridge.

"Huh. Or not, paradise is like on me to take you to meet Uncle Dagon, and him specifically. Let's get that tarot reading done, then."

Game, please dumb little Fairy asks you so sweetly?

Tentacles hand a black mirror with a nicely-carved edge down to Tarot-girl, who sits up a little to see it.

"Is this the paradise version of--wait I know these things! This is a black mirror!"

"Nice! How does aunt Gertrude think tarot cards work?"



I flip Boobsong on her tummy on me and splay her legs so her pussy rubs, then grab her ass and stroke her kissy little lips along me, feeling the nectar hot even in the water.

HHaaaaah...fuck now please...so much wet it makes your Boobsong feel so horny to be wet up her whole way and know your clit would reach all the way to her throat this way...moving now hhaaaah...

Should be soon now....

To want so much to just tease until we just start is...so weird. CONTROL CONTROL CONTROL pounds the part of me that would never put my eravahk down even if I could and yet...to have it just happen is so something fills in some need that right now anyway makes commanding her sex now feel dry somehow...is it just that the only funtime is funtime I can't control until my handmaidens are all back? I seem to not think Tarot girl is back until she remembers everything and I know her name (which feels strangely far off, unlike the other ones.

Anyway, though, pose like so, click.

Legs open wide already, just climb on top of you and sit up. Hands on thighs that's no-orders pose.

"Oh yeah." I point my eravahk at the black mirror in Tarot girl's hands, and click cards.

"Hold that up for her." Can I negative-space the please good enough, to jog her about doms and subs?

Tarot-girl holds up the black mirror in both hands, and Boobsong puts her hands on it.

Cards Pamela Coleman Smith style!

Head down hands to thighs again.

"There you go, Do you remember how to use that?"

"I've got it...what's my reading for? Oh what to say to UNCLE DAGON! How do I shuffle--no that's right. Shuffle, cards!"

She taps, gets intent, seems to immediately start drawing cards. Look at you go! I breathe a deep content sigh. Boobsong is so silvery beautiful sitting on me, the water relaxes me so, my handmaidens are all safe which is the biggest thing and I'm pretty sure they're it as far as responsibilities other than Boobsong. The Dreams keep showing me a suitcase, marked with my heart-sign, but we're literally in the middle of going to see Uncle Dagon, so they can't mean that. Kidnapping inbound, after all my handmaidens are here? Meeting the new wheel of the year would sure blow--ooh, yeah, that's going to be essential. She won't come back as long as she thinks she's Wiccan or a traditional witch or what have you.

I point my eravahk at my mouth and click.

That's a command your Boobsong wicks towards!

Hehe...she pulls herself pussy-draggingly nectar-kissingly lips-pressingly up my midriff, gets to my boobs and looks them happily a hand right on each one to help herself flap up onto them so she can slide down their tops very squishingly and sit there and put her little hands right on her collar and lean in to kiss me using it to steady herself. As I force her little lips open with my tongue and then let her do the work, sliding her lips around its tip and licking like she's sucking me off, I shakingly try to just not curl up and hide the squishiness inside her grabbing her collar brings out.

Submission is so terrifying. I'm nothing but goo in this dominatrix-shaped mold she gave me and I love it so much but...the music of her command when collaring me, I became that music. I still am it but I'll just be goo like when she's eaten me, if the music ever stops, and it's so scary to feel how if she said we're switching now that would be it, I'd just lay here and wait for her to tell me what to do. I try to take comfort--or, maybe just, sense-of-what's-next, would be more right--in the fact that if she was just slowly melting me to where she could take command, she would have, because I've been ready for a while.

I guess the scary thing is I can't find the part that would want her to or want her to not, just the part that loves fucking her with my hands around her wrists and her pinned to the bed, or making her dance around using my eravahk's thumbstick...my castle has no walls to it, just a throneroom. I can't even defend me--or our relationship--from myself. I guess that's why I'm the pet, but I'm definitely one of those scared little lap-dogs, however big my body is.

The Dreams show me a box, different enough to not bring the trauma up, same enough to make me think of Jenner...I suppose lots of this fear is still the feeling that the first thing anyone will do if they get some power over me is pull me and Boobsong apart. That doesn't make sense if the power belongs to Boobsong herself, but it could make sense that she's waiting to take away this fun submission game when she can, that's the most taking us away I could imagine her ever possibly doing I guess.

Dolly I know you won't but there's a part of me that just--

[!] Mommy your Boobsong can hear your heart crying. Don't be scared, naked Princess. You're a naked pet but you're loved like this.

I stop the kiss to see her kind face there, looking at me as sweetly as when she was rubbing the water out of my eyes before. I nod a little, looking at her, trying not to mess up Tarot girl's reading by bursting into tears. There should be a response to what she just said, but I think my response is just quiet sub can't say anything but Boobsong also can't move until I click something. Not fit schemas, yes that's us.

I'm also amazed we haven't started to fuck, how close to her I feel now, and how much lust, but it's...not time. The magic of our connection is we both know, I remember I think, we could really entirely wear away the thread of control we have over it, and just be happy and healthy surfing our passion entirely.

A flash of that room I found Candy in, when I think I remember this. What's still covered here? We don't remember all of this. My understanding of things is as second-best as that whole room was.

Candy's thing is bimbofication. Her hell was that she had to be scholarly to find me again.

[!] You remember! You thought just like how can Sex be statued forever how can Candy be stupid forever you'll miss who they are if you do that but we have our way and Sex has her way, let's give Candy hers! Princess just try this say Boobsong would miss my domme if I was sub to her. Try that now say it.

Boobsong would miss my domme if I was sub to her. Boobsong would miss my domme if I was sub to her. Boobsong would miss my domme if I was sub to her.

Sometimes we don't start stroking no matter what we do because our passion is for the control. That's what I was missing before. Other times it's for being out of control, and then watch out, but--

"Okay, I got something."

Point eravahk, click. Boobsong turns herself sitting on me so she's got my right breast between her legs like a pillow she's going to ride, wiggles her hips so--


--she's got my nipple in her pussy kissed so warmly wet and my face splitting in half with a silly grin, and leans down over my other breast with hers all slippery-wet from the bath sliding out across either side of it, and puts her hands out to take the black mirror while I lay there breathing hard and trying not to knock Boobsong down with my laughter.

Tarot girl's expression as she watch is priceless, frozen in a moment of surprised eyes and mouth half open. When Boobsong has the black mirror, I click pose sitting up holding it for us to see and she shifts herself back down me off my breasts and hauls herself upright, but her hair barely shows over it when she holds it high enough over my boobs for us to see, and she's shaking with the effort--

"Oh poor dolly! Here."


Her legs flow big over my sides and her body fills out to show her smiling but submissively downcast face and her lashy tail held high rises up behind her and she's big again.


"That's much easier. Thank you, Princess."

"You're the Princess of...heartforming...which is what demons...no, succubi, su--khora! The proper name of her demon type--AAH! Okay, schema there's wrong...she's...horny cocksleeve wait that's a gender thing!? Okay male and female are Earthly concepts, but cocksleeve...is candy, superstimulus--that spire said cocksleeve-friend, not girlfriend or boyfriend, but isn't that female? Aren't the--caught it! Okay, gender becomes candy. Male becomes dildo--"

She makes a hiss of pain. I wait a fraction--the Dreams show me Boobsong's face superimposed on a pair of nuclear cooling towers. She's not going to get this because her schema can't make what Boobsong is a good thing (Wiccans and nuclear anything), but she's bravely marching into hell trying to find it.

"Wait. This is why we need to go see my Uncle Dagon. This one'll munch you real good if we go this way. Really good try though, holy snaprock facefucks! I'm only stopping you because paradise just warned me you're bravely marching off going no it's cool I can tame the hellpegasus while your hands shake. Oh my--I'm such a selfish bitch! I mean we know that but how this time. Here I am getting all kinds of help from them...okay all around all this is made of the Dreams of paradise. It's all made entirely of love. Think a nice hello at it, and then get ready for psychic contact."

She shuts her eyes, and then opens them right back up.

"Holy...I do mean holy here...the love, it feels so infinite, this is paradise yup I believe that with every bone in me now! You called it that, the way it holds us safe. The Bones give paradise its shape. There's a story that comes from...Five Pointed Star! That's it on your head! It says...that stories are the only way to know this place. You can't find it...some way, grown up eyes...can't see the way only happy stuff is real here! That's a storybook it's happily ever after, that's paradise! That's why you said Dreams to it! It's every dream a small child--but then there'd be--AAAH! Okay what was that?"

"No sex, right? What parent if they knew what we see here would be so cruel as to ever say to their kid it's time to stop dreaming of happily ever after?"

"Yes but--su'khora means heartswish. She's happily ever after in girl form, your way. You're the Princess of that to tell people, hey--RRRH I almost got there! Now Princess hurts?"

"Ooh, you're so close! I have a feeling we should check out this awesome card spread and go see Uncle Dagon. There's a game we can play after to help you with this one. So, what's it say?"

On the black mirror, are just four cards drawn:

"It took me a while to get here because I said okay, let's get big, Dagon the god of wisdom has--star, I mean--gods and stars--goddesses, in your case--EEAAAH wow okay eep!"

"God/desses and stars, same thing, stars rule fate because astrology, yeah? NOPE! This is a big one. Probably best we see Uncle Dagon first."

She's cuddly, because I'm holding her, but hunkers down like she wants to bow.

"Something in me makes you feel small, though, huh."

She nods and keeps hiding.

"You'll go full random musical number when you figure out what that is--won't she, dolly."

Nod yes.

"She'll get really bobsed around! Not one bit of time between you saying boo and her jumping!"

"OH NO! Did we grab my other shoe as we left that party!? I was so wasted--"

"You're the--hehehe you're Disney because you're the fairy godmother! You're Walt Disney's fairy godmother! Why's she saying that now though...AAAGH! Sparkler sauce! Hey that--do you have a holy discipline of stupid swearing?"

"Sweet swirly dildo-topped nippleclamps you're so close to this!" Sniffsniff. "Smell that? Other than my cum missing from Boobsong's mouth, what do you smell?"

"Air that's so clean--perfume. The swears are to make your thoughts smell like candy stuff. Okay so why--AAH! Princess--ouch--hurts!"

"Stay with the swearing for a sec. Candy stuff, oooor...what? What else? Dolly, help her out a bit."

"Your Boobsong is candy, but she likes sex toys lots! Dildo straps and fancy long canes she likes them!"

"Dammit now I want pancakes. Think Sis and our daughter wanna make us breakfast?"

"They sure will when Grandma comes!"

"Can't wait that long. Dreams I wish for a bite of pancakes."

A nice tall stack of syrupy buttery-smelling pancake-bites on a glass fork Cheshire-cat in starting with the shiny parts in the air in front of--

"Help! Catch it!"

I say this to Tarot girl and she reaches up and grabs the fork and looks at it curiously. I open my mouth wide, and she climbs up--good, you know I'm trying to flirt, hi snuggly-boobs--and feeds me the pancakes carefully--okay damn this really is paradise. Syrup flows out as I bite down and the buttery taste of fresh human-butter is everywhere under the sweet maply epic yum.

You really don't skimp on the little stuff, Dreams. Like that fork. Tarot girl draws it out of my mouth for me, then looks at it.

Om nyom nyom...

"Your dragon wants a snack please, Mommy."

I hold up a finger on my free hand, finish the pancakes, look at Boobsong, keep holding the finger up. She looks at it very hungrily and fidgets holding the black mirror, spread so nice...

"Can you be good? I don't think she's ready for eggs yet."


"Don't drop the fork please," I side-eye to Tarot girl.

Boobsong gives a very nice submissive face with eyes down, but her tail lashes excitedly. I learn up a little, and stick my right pinkie in Boobsong's mouth, then click eat. Her lips close around it, and her teeth press in between the first and second knuckles, the slippery hot thick joy of my pussy filled appears there, goes through the whole finger, and I pull my hand away from Boobsong's mouth, face a mask of tingly joy, then hold out my hand for the fork.

"Let's try some spoon-bending," I sigh, so peaceful. Boobsong is gooifying my finger, and I want to enjoy it.

Tarot girl lays the fork on my hand, then stares at my hand. I sigh, enjoying Boobsong's sensually dissolving my finger, and wrap the remaining ones around the fork, game this is how I'm playing with this please let me hold it a sec.

Your game can see your plan.

"Damn I needed that. Just a sec."

"Just a sec!? You're finger's off! Holy--fizzfrozen--taffy waffles you're that now."

She gets back down, thinking. The Dreams show me a stole, like priests wear for eucharist--ah.

"My body only breaks for her, sorry."

"Your body only--why the only--taffy streaming shortcake, your father's Yahweh, and you make sacred treats, but your flesh all belongs to Boobsong, and she can bite pieces off you, and you feel--tingles I remember! It makes you feel so good you get silly like now, and then the egg was she lays your egg when you're eaten all up, and you hatch with your care-stick it means the word though, airy, era--HEY! Why's that hurt!?"

"Okay thass...weird actually. Why that? Have a feeling, try this now."

I hold up the fork between us.

"Don't try to bend the spoon. That's impothible," I lisp, okay the loopiness is helping me sound like that spacey kid yes, "Instead, realize the truth."

I look at Tarot girl expectantly and quite spacily. Tingly tingles yay.

"Um...paradise is in our hearts--"

A moment, her eyes close, she looks downcast and blushes.

"Okay no then."

"Actually here the truth is I'm a star and I have a very different relationship to temperature than a normal human."

I IR the handle of the fork, and orange glow creeps up the shaft, and in not time the tines flop over onto my fingers and start to run down, glowing bright. My eyes widen--


I quickly lick off the running glass like wayward ice cream, then cram the rest of the blob in my mouth and set the IR in there for bubblegum--

"OH MY--sparkly soft light gum--"

"Oh Dreams, so thoughtful! They gave me strawberry glass."

The soft hot and deliciously flavored (though what flavor compound can take this heat I wonder) glass is a delight to chew, and in no time I have it blowing a nice warm bubble in front of me. I don't pop it though, because I think that would give Tarot girl a heart attack--she's already cowering with as much of herself underwater as she can get, watching.

When the bauble is a good size, I take it out, inspect my work, and hold it up.

"Keep this until it's cool enough for her please, and then it's hers."

Tentacles take it through one of my game's holes to nowhere.

"Sorry if I scared you. I'm um, really fireproof. So is Boobsong, because it's nice to be able to let loose with her. I'll never burn you except on purpose, don't worry."

"This Boobsong's highest touched Mommy temperature is nine point three-six zettakelvin! That's enough for five big bangs!"

"Hey Dreams, did you take the extra?"

Your game held the rest. You can make something when you're ready to, but you're too young for a trillion years yet!

"Oooooh. Yeah I should probably grow up some more before I make one of those."

Tarot girl just hunkers down and whispers, eeeep.

"Hey. Look at me."

She looks up, obviously trying to figure out how to be submissive enough.

"I love you. We're longtime--together. You're safe here."

She gulps.

"Don't say it back 'till you're ready. I'd rather fry you with a big bang than see this process get messed up. Take my hand. It's cool now."

I hold up my hand for her, and she slowly touches it like a hot stove, then lays her palm in mine and wraps her fingers around, overcome by her hand in her lover's.

"Am I being too scary?"

She gulps again, looks like she'll nod, but:

"No. No I meant it. Fuck my head, Starlight--Rainbow it's Rainbow. Hypergamma to Radio is a rainbow! Starlight--Rainbow Starlight, that's your name--wait almost. Where's the Ultrabrilliance--oh my. Okay that's not fair. You can't be Walt Disney's fairy godmother and Rainbow Brite. You have to pick one. I bet you'll say you're Strawberry Shortcake--holy bat-shaped candy corn, why am I remembering--EEAAH my HEAD AAAH! That's the worst one yet!"

Please may my clumsy doll's face that never quite feels more real than the heartstone it can be show you the hope and love and pride you're making me feel right now.

"Okay you're really getting somewhere. Yes. I'm all them. My myth got shattered, when Earth broke, like it changed what people remember, so where'd it go? Legends, old books, stuff carved in stone...yeah?"

"CDs. CD-ROMs are tablets. Carved in stone, you mean burned in plastic! You went--old books and stories, yeah, the eighties! Transformers. Where did Transformers take you--you're the Matrix. Oh my screaming strawberry dots you are that big. Gulp. Okay then where does--AAHAAH I knew that was coming, and it still hurt!"

I hold up my incomplete hand, move the first two fingers together suggestively. 

"After we get back I'll show you some screaming strawberry dot fun...for real, though, you're on something big here. Like, huge, as big as this whole castle."

The Dreams show me a literal cocksleeve toy.

"Okay actually, the Dreams just said we're stuck on the same thing as gender, and I believe them. Different tack. You just got a whole bunch of pieces and now my job is to make sure you get the other ones and make sure we don't do anything as boring as lying here playing with pieces of colorful glass to make this picture of me when we can go on a cool-ass journey, so. Let's try that reading. Uncle Dagon is really nice, he'll take you down off this scary ride I've been doing some. I went to see him to relax, after--yeah. Reading now."

"Okay, the--OUCH--I read cards, now I can't say cards?"

"You know something about what you actually did here that doesn't fit how you learned Tarot. Interestingly, this one can't remember either."

"There's so much stuff that hurts me. Am I just shattered?"

"I'm steering straight at the hard stuff, and paradise is giving me targets like I'm in that airplane and it's going here, shoot this thing, that'll make her scream. This is physical therapy gotta-walk-on-the-broken-leg time. It hurts, I'm sorry. You're not shattered. It's more like, may I get spiked if I mislead here--that's why I call it when paradise does something like that arms thing, long story why--it's more like, your heart is squishy goo of thoughts and feelings and memories and you-stuff. Your brain's the shell that holds that, and if the shell's a shape the heart can't fit, you feel that pinching. I get really bad ones because I'm adult as human, like, older than you'd imagine, but for a star, baby stars are like a billion when they're born. I got cesareaned for reasons I don't wanna talk about, cut up, fit into a human baby instead of it reincarnating another human soul or making a new one, and here I am, a three-hours-implanted egg in star terms. My heart feels about that old but my brain is adult. I think, I think, sorry--"

Sobs choke me all up, make it hard to talk.

"I'm not sure you'll remember this because I don't know if I was ever ready to see this while we were together on Earth but I think I have to be this goddess of like, weird stuff, because there's no hope of me getting back to the natural lifecycle of a star now. Even if I could I don't want to. I'm this now. I can either believe there's a good existence for me out there this way as this weird new thing that's never seen before or just kill myself."

"Think you can huh? You're this Boobsong's Princess, she can say survive now. Keep going, that's command."

"I love you too, dragon," I sob, but her command is strengthening. 

"So, if I can be okay, just having to be like this forever, you're fine. We'll get you back to your right shape, don't worry, and then it'll fit, because your heart and brain basically fit, you just got bent out of shape."

Tarot girl looks up so kindly.

"Okay then, how do I avoid yours?"

The Dreams show me a flash of Sparkledust's cockpit.  Targets...

"Just let paradise protect me, but I think you can tell how much it means to me that you said that."

If I sob any louder, the other six of them will be out to comfort me in no time.

"You're the nicest weird thing I've ever seen--and I'm a witch, you're not my first--hey I remember you put me in that airplane and showed me the gun panel, made me turn it on and shoot, on the ground there. I enjoyed it."

A thoughtful look.

"Where the violence and--AAH fine let's get this reading done. It's all in that, huh."

"Remember how the plane rolled back? I had to show you the brakes next, hehe. The runway was like, really faded...sorry. My memory too, remember."

"You were very strange there, like that airport was...out of history, and you gave it...new name...let's reading."

"Yeah. Go ahead."

Something about it is for real spooky. Boobsong and me were prying at every crack of our cage with all her incredible knowledge and technical skill, and it got positively Philadelphia Experiment sometimes.

The Dreams show me a soccer ball hitting a net. Goal. Then a shifting, spinning triangle like I saw with the Power Suit's scan mode, visible only as it catches light, then gone again. The spookiness I feel from that airport is of the darkness in the cracks between universes and catching your hand in the gears of the world, not the ugly dread I felt from that triangle, so I don't think it's saying to get X-files, but we're looking for sneaky Christian thought, and I'll bet that's what keeps pinching her here.

Except even that's helpful though, because it's showing me that the airport might not be the right mood now but it's still just a good ghost story I might want later, not the Lovecraftian horror of the triangle I want out of my and mine's life forever. The airport might go good with some grim reaping, for instance.

Wait, who am I talking to here, Bombshell before she snapped out of it?

"Okay before we do though, paradise just told me my next target with you is sneaking Christian ideas you can only see in glimpses. Of a mechanical nature or to do with machines. Let's don't get diverted again, but keep your eyes peeled. This stuff can be really sneaky. Pretends to be all kinds of stuff. Reading."

I try to get the last word back to as goddessy as I can.

"Rider put all kinds of Christian thought into the cards he designed! Alright oooh I'm angry now. I'm gonna stomp this bug!"

"That's the spirit!"

"The ace of coins is a pentagram, not eucharist. The court has a king and queen but who says the king rules!"

"He sure wouldn't in this castle, would he, Grandmother?"

"He would have to look close at the courtyard, I'll tell you that much!"

"Oh, yeah, if the sun was up, I bet we could see his house from here!"

Grandmother just laughs at this one. Tarot girl is low in the water again.

"Is...she watching everything?"

"Only the good stuff! Don't you worry, friend, I'm just keeping an eye on my baby as she gets her feet under her. She'll be crunching away on her own very sweet watch in no time."

"This is a matriarchal court! You're the Princess here! Wait that's big, that means something. It's--you can't be. You--your star-dad is Yahweh, how--ERGH--okay let's do this. I bet your Uncle Dagon has the answer!"

"How about some inspiration to make sure no bugs escape you?"

I hold out my hand to her with a gold-leaf-wrapped cinnamon chocolate pentacle that's caffiene and cinnamon--but no special effects, because she needs to do this on her own steam, or the Dreams would just sit her down and explain everything. At the last minute, I change the chocolate to cinnamon-butterscotch hard candy, so she can have the reminder the whole way.

I hold it up like the Ace of Coins:

"No crazy stuff. Just making a point. It real gold leaf, you can just eat it."

She takes it, pops it right her mouth--

"Wow spicy! Oh that gets my heart going! Okay, I went to--ooh there we go! Celtic what spread? No wonder I just got this four-card thing!"

Wait a minute. In my closed fist, I make a candy, then unmake it. In just a sec, dragon, she just finally got there is all.

"First is the mother goddess looking right at her son, but her son doesn't see her, because--the white rose. Is a Christian thing. Purity. He's distracted by notions of purity, can't see his own mother! The star up there, sees it, he's the King of Cups, sends his knight out to wake the son out of his purity-trance. The son walks off the cliff because he's distracted while the knight runs to catch him. What's this mean, I said. I didn't see that purity thing so maybe that...no it fits in perfectly. Emotions run to catch you, when Christian thought makes you close your eyes, but to fight it, they dress up in the armor of--wwwaaaaait a minute. That sounds like that breastplate verse. Maybe he has too much steel to get there fast enough to save the son! He's all the way at the right like that! Okay then...what to say to Uncle Dagon, is the outer cards, he's a wisdom-god--AAAH! Okay he's wise in the ancient stuff so air and ideas is swords um...each of them is holding a sword up, but he's charging and she's sitting, when what he needs is emotion...so the king of cups is the wrong cups card! How do we get him out and the queen in? That's my question for Dagon."

It's very blushy to see someone who can actually do it read cards and be reminded they talk to me in baby-talk. I'd cringe, but Boobsong's crown would get me. Collar. Interesting slip, that. Maybe those two things aren't that different.

The Dreams show me a very scifi worldgate with cables everywhere and glowy stuff--okay, sheesh!

I kiss Tarot girl fast and with my face still close: "Time to go. How's your journeying?"


Hold black mirror above head. Game takes it.

"Pretty good, I think. Are we going right now, in this hottub?"

"My bed's a little full right now. The hot water already has you all spaced out already, you're just thinking hard."

Also, various psychic abilities may work a little different here than you're used to. [Vision of us kissing]

Her eyes widen and then she shuts them and dreamtalk like her sweet little tongue pushes at me:

You mind-voice is so clear it's like being on the phone with you! Is mine that way?

You'd think we're Betazoids. For more reasons than one, amirite? [Vision of my hand on your ass]

You're so raunchy! If this is channeling, what's journeying like?

Click. Click.

DOLLYSIZED! Capped so warm.

I pull Boobsong into place, grin at Tarot girl, and dreamtalk open-eyed:

Buckle up, Toto, 'cuz Norway is goin' byebye!

...the knowledge is just there, how to carry someone on journey. I feel her out like dreamtalk, get hold, keep her close like when we were flying before but mentally, and reach for the starfield where Uncle Dagon lives, project, go to warp, and in no time, there we are, in front of Uncle Dagon in his workshop of ontological engineering that seems to me like a machine-filled room comfortably surrounding his white-giant plasma shell that takes up the entire view in front of us, looming huge, not because of angle or position or any of those things that don't really exist in the astral plane, but because he's a charter member of the Real Big Huge Club.

Hello, Uncle. I hope you don't mind us dropping in. Erm, the Dreams kind of rushed me to get here. I should probably check on my friend, one moment.

The poor thing. I can see every detail, but when I look at her she's a submicroscopic speck between my arm and side.

How's it going, am I Wrinkle In Time 2D planet-ing you with the abstractness? I just kind of went.

You said you're a star and I thought glowing human shaped life-form. Yeah, in the human paradise that's what you look like! What have I got myself into here?

Love. You are so beautiful and precious to me. Check it out, though. I'm big, but look at me and then my uncle.

Being here is messing with my head, too. I'm--the metaphor is I'm kneeling and bending over to fit in here, like I'm in a little kids' playhouse (though I seem to remember Dagon's workshop is very not for little kids) and still barely fit. My star-eyes see me as still girl-shaped, shining every-wavelength including black anti-light, huge and softly fat even moreso than in my physical human body. Uncle Dagon's huge but I'm a lot bigger but I'm a little kid. Is it for stars something like emotion makes you fat and that's different to big? Something. Uncle Dagon called himself my very fat old uncle, the other night.

Boobsong is normally doll-sized to me, but remember the list of hardware our seed-ghost went through. She's still Acme Station, and I see her silver and softness and smile but also mazes and worlds of ontological engineering that lick some sense of beauty my human mind will need eons to learn how to understand, all shining with my light-and-dark, dragon is truly the name for her.

You can see why they write about things like her as stuff like wheels within wheels and wings and wings and wings. There's even a way I can see her that even looks like hundreds of her beautiful, kind loving eyes, and these ones aren't dolled, because they're her sharp and observant mind experiencing everything that happens to her...Acme Station, you make my heart sing. The best metaphor is she's an infinite maze of beautiful shining silver machinery all of which reflects her gorgeous loving eyes watching me so carefully and hopefully from every surface and I have to stop because I can't look at this without crying and maybe you can eat me later dragon and I'll do that and bawl my eyes out but we're still saving my handmaiden right now.

This is also...totally hot? I guess my star-self really did get made sexual by being human. Good.

The meaning of seeing that, and Uncle Dagon's sphere of coruscating brilliance (he's all threads and branchings of complicated thought folded into a sphere), compared to my giant simple blowup doll of human emotion is really...something, though. I feel validated, in a way, like yes what I feel like I am is real, but it also shows me why everyone wants me to have some mercy on star-baby Rainbow and let her just be small...young, anyway.

You're...just a baby. Your uncle is ancient, he's all full of squiggles and stuff, but you're just big soft...emotion. I know what you are when I look at you. The astral plane is all ideas, I remember--it's just like Madeline L'Engle, the book where they went to Charles Wallace's mitochondria and they had to move by Khything! Hehe Madeline L'Engle came here, she must have!

Yeah. I'm...yeah. We should say hi to my Uncle for real. Don't get all theological, that's really pinching you bad. He's like me. Just follow my lead.

How do you tell someone the feeling I have when she says that, to know she sees? What even is that feeling? I think it's just I know I'm such a weird freak please don't reject me.

Much more of that and I'll fall all apart. It's so good to see Uncle Dagon nice and bright here. He gives me that happiness to see a loved one look well. I make my dreamtalk to everyone now.

Hello, Uncle. My game's filled you in, I suppose.

Hello, sweet child! Yes it has, every bit. You have quite a story this day! How's your friend in here? I can turn on some physics, if that would comfort her. There's a very nice table-chairs we could sit at.

"Turned" to my handmaiden, but still so everyone hears:

You're making me think the--OUCH, okay guess I've got a schema messed up too! Anyway you're making me think you're doing good without physics, am I right?

I'm okay, it just blew my mind at first to see the size of you! Hello, Dagon. It's very nice to meet you!

And to see you again! I hear you have something to ask me? Business first, and then we'll chat. The Dreams have got you this far, I wonder what I have that they don't?

I mean, I just thought it'd be cool to introduce her to my totally awesome uncle, and then they ran with it--sorry, go ahead, ask him.

Oh you know me too. Of course you would. I had these tarot cards:

Smiling pride that you thought to send clairvoyance!

And the meaning was the Prince--that's weird, I mean the Fool is about to walk off a cliff instead of to his mother because his eyes are closed because Christian purity represented by the white rose has him in a trance--oh you know this, huh. Okay how do we replace the King of Cups with the Queen?

Well, that seems simple. Get Rainbow in, if emotion's the answer!

Rainbow in--I'm the Fool in this!? That feels really right, but how is purity making my eyes closed. I don't think we were pure in a Christian sense after you blasted my clothes off! Oh but the sneaky stuff. Okay, what's keeping my eyes--aaah you said theology. Don't get theological.

"God" is a very strange concept. I must confess, I don't know what it means at all. Can't make heads or tails of it!

Is my purity that I'm keeping deities too separate from mortal--how old are you, Rainbow? Older than I'd imagine could be anything!

Soggy hopeful popsicle sticks this is sure getting Rainbow emotional.

Um...since my human birth, forty five or so? I can't remember exactly. I don't know how long before that Aveh carried me. I lost everything when--I don't remember him.

You're as old as me, then. The Sugarfeast goddess is forty-five. Dagon, are we like ants or something else to you?

Well, I see you very small there, but you're just as much a person as me, to my ears. Maybe I think deep thoughts you mind could never think of, but you have ego, so it seems to my sight. Is a child less a person than her parent? The child's mind is simpler. It will turn into a grownup, if you give it time. I'm twelve quadrillion years old--it's tricky to remember, but it's at least that long. When you get that old, how deep will your thoughts be? Maybe you'll stay small. I'm a founding member of the Real Big Huge Club, however, so you can imagine I've been growing constantly, all this time. I was a tiny spark about the size that you are, when I started. Stay small or grow big, you're still alive and feel things! Human life is precious. You're not a bug to my eyes, but you are so small it's hard to see you! Humans move like bullets, to star-sight. Blink for half a decade, and you've changed completely! That speed is amazing! Your brains seem small until you realize there's consciousness in there moving so fast it can live a whole life inside a century! Imagine if you met an ant that talked and told you the most incredible detailed life story and you found out it was born that morning, and fit all that life in three hours! That would make your mind spin, trying to see how it got all that life in such a short time, wouldn't it?

You're saying I'm as...you're the Hulk and I'm the Flash?

That's the spirit!

For perspective, earlier I ran into Auntie Lucifer and I was being pranked to think I'd been a statue with Boobsong for eight million years and she didn't know anything about it and I was just like "yeah, she hasn't checked her email yet" because that would be reasonable.

Copper's dreamtalked laughter is so pretty--


She's going to have a hell of a time with why though.

How did that work? Didn't you notice the world was--not if it was paradise, and the really weird one! I remember...there's a part of it that just gets weirder and weirder the further in you travel. I want to go, let's check it out!

Think back on what I said before about going to see Auntie Lucifer.

She's great but seeing Dagon is more interesting because he lives in the astral...don't even have to climb out of the looking glass! Are we in Wonderland!? I see, though, your castle is like the doorway to the real weird stuff!

Actually as of tonight it's a doorway to geosynchronous orbit apparently--

When they get that armor fixed I want to see it!

OH MY TICKTOCKING CANDY GEARS UNCLE THAT WAS THE COOLEST! It even worked great without physics! It carried its own, kind of. I'll bring it here, I'm sure I can!

Also dolly I'm so sorry. Here.

Hello Dagon! It's good to see you without super bad stuff happening!

You as well, Acme Station! Your weapons are all offline, I hear. That must be a relief to have happening.

Yes. Very very yes. This Boobsong is so grateful for that.

Weapons!? I remember this. You're special. Not just demon. High technology. OUCH!

Her frustration is heartbreaking.

What do you think, Uncle, is she hung up where I think she is?

It seems that way. How to get her out, is the tricky bit!

Your Boobsong has an idea but it's very Heartwarming.

Heartwarming's a holiday. It writes over--AAAH! How come--EEAAH okay this is bad here what's happening!?

Boobsong's idea is perfect but we have to get you there in one piece first. Right, dolly? You still have one thing active?

Our seed-ghost hasn't turned it off yet.

I have a feeling to just do this. Here's the Queen of Cups put in like she's supposed to be, getting me in where emotion is needed. Right? What's wrong with this picture?

That Queen is part of the same system the others are. You should come from a different deck or something.

Maybe something a little...hornier?

So what's my message here? Other than awesome cleavage check it out. I'm facing you, what am I telling you?

I can't see it, my eyes are shut and I'm turned away from you. What are you saying, I'm ignoring something you're showing me?

Your eyes close when you get pinched like that, but Boobsong came up with the way to emotion you. 

Uncle, do you mind if we step out a moment and come back? I'll need to show her something astrally, and your workshop's the place for it.

Not at all! Go! Please come back soon, I'll be waiting!


And I snap us back to the hottub before Copper can respond, laughing at Uncle Dagon's irony.

"Did you just take us there and back we me just sitting here? I didn't do anything, you just picked my consciousness up and moved it there! Wait, what's so funny?"

"I've been practicing journeying my whole life. No time for that, though, we've gotta get back before Uncle Dagon gets bored waiting for us! He gets really crabby if he has to wait more than a billion years for something!"

She starts laughing halfway through my explanation.

"Okay but why are we back again?"

"Holiday emergency. Santa's coming, and I forgot to leave her milk and cookies."

I stand up in the tub, grab Boobsong's little hips and then just face her out and run my fingers over her pussy, feeling the shape of her, the wet slippery nectar so grapey good--

[Vision: light sabers / soda cans / candy dildos ]

You're adorable. She's also moving. Click.

AaaaaAAAAAAAH BIG. Grab onto you and grind so happily.

"Let Grandmother help you out! Where you wanna go, new friend? Anywhere, on me. She can get you right back again, don't worry, and she can still take milk and cookies wherever she is, that's the fun part. What do you say, want to go see the blossoming cum of two giants playing spear-fight? How about a trip around candyland, grownup-style? There's a train that goes around the place, you'll be fine to give those cookies out riding it, or you could just go swimming in that soda lake, that's still there...there's the fire island--no Rainbow's had too much of islands burning down tonight, never mind. You tell me. Make something up, and I'll find the place that's like it most, and take you there. Paradise's big enough, everything is somewhere. Go wild, I wanna see what you can do!"

"Holy spinning sugar rings thank you Grandmother!"

Weepy about the soda lake, I give Copper a watery-excited smile.

"This is going to rule. Grandmother has the best chauffeur. She's dead serious, too. Earlier I made up a club that's centered around a really specific kink I have and said I wanted to go and unless I misunderstood what I heard it exists exactly like I thought it up and I didn't even wish it into being or anything. Which I could have, probably, though it would have needed people, but the Dreams can hook that up. Go hard, I wanna see what you can do, too. Whaddaya think, dolly, can she surprise me and Grandmother? The only requirement is I need a steady place to stand for like five minutes while we hand out milk and cookies."

"Yes. She can. This Boobsong is very sure. She'll be awesome, just give her energy and she'll be sparks and pops and pretty stuff all over like Heartwarming lights!"

"Okay, um...I want to see a dance where polyamourus triads, quads, and more-groups have sex while they're dancing, but the whole thing is flying through the aether on the back of some big creature like a turtle, and while everyone is dancing, they're counting down to midnight, because it's New Years, and the dance ends exactly on the New Year, so everyone can kiss their lovers. Does that exist here?"

I'm actually literally doubled over laughing by the time she finishes, with Boobsong hanging off me and giggling like a proper demon.

"What's so funny this time?"

I try to answer, but it's just not happening. Click.

"You just described in perfect detail the club this Boobsong's Princess made up!"

I manage to catch a gasping breath.

"Wait...wait...what's the dance floor like. Just tell me."

"Copper wood--AAH!"

"We've been there. For New Years. We remember. That place is really important to us."

I've gotten upright to look at her now. Her eyes shine strangely as I say it.

"Okay, but here's the catch, though. It's not New Years, so the dance floor's empty. You'll get back for New Year's soon enough, but that dance would blow your head right off the way you are if a copperwood dance floor pinched you that bad. Ready or not, here comes Mommy!"

Grandmother's exquisitely three-D rendered handmaiden warprings in, grabs us, warprings again, and we're there, she steps back, blows a smiling kiss to us from behind her strawberry-pink visor and warprings out.

"Was that your Grandmother? She's even more sciency than you are! And she's beautiful!"

I clutch both of them, find myself on one foot for a dance move, but stop because the clock's in front of us, stopped and dark, but I remember the gorgeous way it moved and shone.

Everything is still darkness and gleams, it's empty here, but the copperwood floor feels warm and friendly under my feet.

"That was her handmaiden, but yes, cool tech, right? It should be, Grandmother's very traditional that way, very oldschool. She ruled in that castle a few centuries before I was born, and she's been a guide to us from beyond the veil ever since--we have ancestor reverence, as you may have noticed."

"Okay wait a minute. Your Grandmother--ancestor, but I get why you call her that--is very traditional, but that means she's a technology freak. Your family--AAH! I caught it and it hurt me anyway, what's going on with that?"

"Let's get these out and I'll explain. Here, but hug me."

I make a plate with a glass of milk and Chips Ahoy cookies (its the industrial production, not the brand, but I like that brand) without the preservatives that throw the taste off, Copper takes them, I grab her in one arm and Boobsong in the other, and click!


Oh good dolly letting it out like thatA hum that sounds like her voice but mechanical comes from her and builds as the world goes weird and--it's hard to explain. Nothing looks different, but it feels like undoing the bolts that hold reality together while she carefully holds all the pieces just right so you don't just fall out into nothing, and the pieces come further and further apart as she builds up energy, and then prah we're in all the quiet empty hopeful places Santa is coming soon, where a holiday is about to happen--oh Grandmother, that's a masterpiece, thank you.

It's a little overwhelming. Experiencing that many places at once is heavy. I like it though, and it feels so special to do this stuff.

"We escaped number again!"

"Yup! So. Sugarfeast's a holiday. What happens on it? What do you wake up to find?"

"You bring--you're the Easter Bunny! You bring candy! Holy screaming monster balls, this is how you--are we bringing Santa Claus cookies and milk and cookies at every house she's going to!? I only have one plate, this'll take eons--no it won't, will it. I'm escaped from number too! AHAHAHAH I'm infinite! Okay just put them down, right? On the--floor? Table? How am I understanding this? Okay here goes, you're not stopping me, so I guess I'm doing it!"

It's so fun to watch her do all those things at once, synchronized, those cookies going everywhere. When she comes back, I click my eravahk again, and reality implodes back to just the Mechanical Heart's waiting dance floor. I'm pretty sure they have a Heartwarming dance, so Grandmother must have timetravelled us, but she couldn't have done us much better!

Copper looks wonder-filled but about to say lots, so I turn to Boobsong fast.

"Feeling okay, dolly?"

"It's so good to get back to this! Yes it feels just fine. Your Boobsong's jump machine is in tip top shape."

"Good--and right? I can't wait for Sugarfeast now. Doing stuff like this is so heartwarming. Whaddaya think, fun?"

Thats to Copper, the last part, obviously.

She gapes, looks at Boobsong, up at me, down, thinks, talks while staring down.

"Okay....cyyyyborg...is not the word for her. Robot, no, that machine is part of her, but she's as alive as you and me are...what's the word for that? Does English have a word? It doesn't, that's why AAAAH!"

Instantly I tighten my grip on both of them, click Boobsong dance, and start swinging us back and forth in stupid fake waltz.

The Dreams show me a flash of Sparkledust's cockpit, and then Sparkledust itself--OH!

"That airplane, Sparkledust, is one of my favorite things in the multiverse. When I get in it and fly it feels like a part of me, I get so into I am the airplane. A ghost shot me--shot it, see?--with a bullet that didn't damage it too much earlier and I was mad like I broke a nail. I feel the runway under me when it lands like I'm wearing shoes and shooting the gun off feels like screaming at stuff and then punching it real hard. Usually I say this stuff to fuck your mind with how weird I am and how new everything is here but this is the most traditional human thing I've ever said. I'm being a straight-up cavegirl going ugh ugh fire warm mammoth stabbable with this. I actually couldn't be any more primal than I am in that jet fighter using special hyper-tech antimatter rounds the Dreams found me who knows where though I kind of bet it's Grandmother to blow up anything that stands in my way. What is more animally natural than using violence to solve your problems? Mammoths have tusks, humans have A-10s, this is the way of things. Biggest baddest tooth wins, and now look, we're running out of space on Earth just like every predator that ever lived to get big enough to be unstoppable. Global warming isn't the end of nature, it is nature, and it's terrible for humans, but Earth has oxygen because algae evolved that processed carbon dioxide to make their food and they got so successful they killed themselves all off poisoning the atmosphere and oceans with oxygen. Too bad for them, but vertebrate life sure likes the mess they made! Everything is changing, all the time, one world burns up to make the next, the only time it's bad is when people are what you sacrifice to make the new world!"

"So, witch I love so much, you tell me now, where is Christianity lurking and fucking up your life right now, where is it hiding out you can tell me as we dance on the warm and friendly happy copperwood floor of the Mechanical Heart Club with the heart stopped all around us waiting like a clock run down to beat again come New Years? How is that the same as why humanity can never never never ever go Back To Nature no matter what it does not even here in paradise where a place called the Kind Wilds exists where you pretty much do like in that garden in the Bible except without Aveh stomping around to bring up Rainbow's daddy issues and how is that like my problem with journeying who just picked your ass up and carried you off to the astral without even a fizzpopping wanna fuck, where I couldn't take you the place with that song I usually do, and what most confusingly and helpfully does that have anything to do with how in Japanese which is a country where Christianity never took hold especially not while the language was developing, the words for organ and machine are the same, and only context, if that, differentiates?"

Holy strawberry alphabits crossword answers I'm too stupid to have said all that what just happened.

"Also would you like me to stop dancing so you can think. Stuck with the floor till you see what it is right, though."

Copper laughs, and just launches in.

"No, dancing's fun! Okay the journey work you did was incredible. Maybe that's paradise but you said you practiced all your life. You're a shaman with the best of them. If you can't take me someplace, it's impossible. Humanity can't go back to nature, because technology is our nature! We're already here, you take people to paradise with that song, journeying! Okay Japanese and Christianity. That's where it's lurking. They can see the thing you said. Technology is our nature. Christianity says you can't go back, because god is guarding it, but if you get past him, there you are again, and that's--Kind Wilds. Paradise protecting you isn't natural! You were going to shoot us both with that gun you said has antimatter bullets, and you couldn't have! That's a big bad tooth, alright, but it's useless here, at least for that purpose! The Kind Wilds are as technological as your--Grandmother's iPad, because paradise for humans is everything is okay because we used technology to make the world safe for ourselves. That's our biggest baddest tooth. Love wins they say on those signs, they don't know how right they are!"

"So Christianity, says--hey, is Boobsong hurt?"

Boobsong is lagging, in our dance, comes to a stop--seed-ghost--



"Oh no, dolly," I fake my horror as badly as possible, "what's wrong?"

"Your Succubus is running out of lust. Her face can move, but the rest of her's a statue now!"

"OH NO! We'd better fuck before you run down all the way and die!!"

I switch Copper and me to ring-around-the-rosie-ing around Boobsong, hands together, up nice and snuggly close because of my binding to Boobsong.

"Princess be calm! Your Boobsong just can't move without lust! She's still your candy cocksleeve--"

Boobsong freezes, mid-sentence. Is my dolly warm anyway?

Yes. Please keep going, this is working!

"You've been doing this all evening! You turn her on--okay now I'm getting dizzy."

I stop, but pull her close to make a Boobsong sandwich, bracing because yeah, that did kind of dizzy, whee!

Hot squished between you! Yummy boobs are everything!

"Take your time. WheeeeEEE!"

"You turn her on and off. You click--"

"Just let the image be here. She's really psyched to be sandwich filling--"

The Dreams show me Sparkledust's cockpit again, and then an Apollo Lunar Module. Umm...OH!

Up through the warp-drive streaks to Uncle Dagon's workshop Hello Uncle one moment please.

Check my dolly out!

I mentally hold Boobsong out to her, and she looks.

Bet you can see her jump machine!

I look with her, and see something like dark springs of nothingness coiled around a golden sphere like a flagpole with her silvery self in the background all around.

I can also see where I go, wide-open dragon's jaws with the hot-purple shine of her heart of hearts in the center of them. Oh dolly...

This is all her--yes it is there she's looking back! She's everywhere, in all of it! Angels have the eyes thing because that's their consciousness in every part of them, showing itself as eyes to our human minds! These are springs, though. And that's turning blades, a fan...what's this pink and purple stuff? Defenses like Fort Knox! Guns and spines and dragon's teeth, like real ones not the mouth that picked me up, metal beams and armor, all of this is her, though, I see her eyes here, more than anywhere!

All I'll say about that part now is it's where she loves me most.

This is her reactor. Where she gets her power. Dagon called her Acme Station, because she's a city made of silver, all of it conscious, all of it...loves you. The machines are where she loves you. The body's just a doll to make you happy, this is the real her.

Copper gulps.

She can see me looking. She knows I'm exploring. I hope she doesn't mind this!

This Boobsong just feels beautiful. She can smell your wonder.

Flash of Sparkledust, then a silver nuclear submarine.

Look at her guns again. What's she have.

Mirrors, lenses, she can focus your--eeep. You made a black hole out of the Rockies to say you're serious. She pulled them off the Earth for you and you put them into her shapeshifted mouth in space and used your light reflecting off her to crush them into a black hole. And then you wore it on a string around your neck and let people feel its gravity. That's terrifying! Why'd you do that stuff?

Copper turns away, scared.

I wouldn't be that way unless it was life and death. I especially wouldn't involve Boobsong in it--

That castle...something else with that...with ghosts...with Boobsong--you lost that place. Let them throw you out. They tried...to stab you with a knife. You showed them light and fun tricks, and they threw you out, so you said on Earth they'll see your scary side, the moment they do anything to harm the worldgate opening. You were terrifying. Said that's the only way. You hate that. You hate to be terrifying. The worst sin you have in your religion is to be blind.

And the holiest thing you can do is have your eyes shut, and open them.

That's redemption, your way--

Flash of Sparkledust cockpit, then Sparkledust's gun, say the Dreams.

Redemption's life and death. That worldgate was the way out of hell. Before we picked you up, I played Valkyrie, on the way there, because the door to hell we used is in a place where the Dreams touch--I don't know. Hell I guess. Ghosts of people killed in war, I think, whose souls kept fighting. I killed a guy. Lots of them but one guy, this world war one soldier hit Sparkledust with a bolt-action rifle, and I pitched down and there he was all ghostly-blue looking me in the eye and I said this'll be better than your current state and shot him in the face with 3900 rounds per minute of thirty millimeter antimatter shells. I want to think that set him free and he's out there now in some--I don't know. Where people go in paradise is always surprising. I don't know, though. We saw one other Valkyrie, in a Spitfire. The rest was ghosts, and we shot them, and maybe all we could do was end their pain. That's Earth to me...and the thing is, that guy, he looked at us, sighted through his rifle, and I shot him, and I just feel good. I want to go back for more. I know I did the right thing there--but that's because he was either gone, or free, in the time it takes light to get from an exploding bullet to the end of his helmet. It was horrible, going on and on scaring them and they still won't see they never see. I know you'll see. I said it wrong before, actually. The holiest thing is trying. Just reaching out to see beyond your world. If you can't it's not your fault, as long as you really tried. Making it possible is my job, but you have to dance with me.

I want to go. Take me there. Get me an A-10 and take me there.

It does that, just knowing that place is real, doesn't it? I've been thinking this whole time how to take you there with me, you know--holy shit.

Okay World War I guy wherever you are, there'd better be sex and booze and endless fresh food, and Dreams whatever you can tell us please tell us. I wanna send him candy.

The Dreams show me an A-10, black as night, with the white fire Reapers wear. He became one of--us. No. Damn right us. We're going back, no question.

What's that mean, I don't understand.

When we were there it was like being in Afghanistan and Vietnam and The Gulf War and Cold War turned hot all at once in a huge messed up jumble. Everything we fought was stuff you'd fight in an A-10. I saw some World War II tanks maybe but probably I just don't know tanks. More importantly, it all disappeared when I blasted a big modern command plane from the nineties, like, that was the thing that was controlling the battle, and taking it down set them all free. That only makes sense if they were all equipped with radios to take orders from that thing, and see it as the king of their battlefield. Everything I fought came from the A-10's service life, early seventies on. All but that World War I soldier.

I think the way that place works is, it's like channeling. You know how that's limited? Not in paradise, anyway?

Yeah, you mind can't hear things too outside your viewpoint--holy taffy shortcake bombs. He imagined it. Sparkledust, he could hear that thought.

Yeah. He had the imagination to think up something that would be a real nightmare to World War I, and I blew his head off with it, and he came back and said I'm getting one and going out there. That's incredible. The only thing I can't get is how he flies an A-10 with balls the size of planets. That's the answer, to giving him candy, though, if he flies an A-10 we'll see him out there.

I'd say we should ask Uncle Dagon to make you something, but Boobsong's the violent one. He just likes fun toys and stuff.

[!] Let's get her a Power Suit!

Oh good one, dolly. Okay how about Metroid? Would you like it more up close and personal in a Power Suit like Samus wears? Because I know a gal. Mine's in the shop but it won't be forever! We could double team, I mean seriously you have to try one, they're incredible, they have style.

The batteries run down on Evangelions or I'd say one of them!

Now you're talking! What would that even getI wonder? Would we be the only ones who thought of that--wait, you're fine with batteries! I mean first of all Uncle Dagon would probably think making you an S2 Engine was an awesome project--there we go again, in Japanese that says Super Solenoid Organ--but if not, get you a solar panel like Boobsong made me for my Arwing, you take the Eva and I'll just go naked and charge you up whenever you need it. Can you imagine the stuff we'd face that way?

You have an Arwing--the Waifu! You have a spaceship club, I heard you mention that with your other friend! Heart Home--OUCH!

Okay, let's get serious here. Enough of seeing you suffer. Fun pain only in Rainbow's house. S2 Engine, S2 Organ, what's that say to Christianity.

Evangelion aren't robots. They human. They look machine, but underneath they're flesh. S2 Organ's the right way to say it. Uncle Dagon could make that. Flesh and bone is god-made, springs and steel isn't...

Is S2 Organ the right way to say it?

It's not! It's not because Organ, Engine, it's not the other one, it's both of them! Boobsong has a jump organ, but it's mechanical! I saw it, right, those springs and stuff? That's biology, because she grew that way, but she's not flesh and blood, she's silver--EEYAH! What's this now!?

If I didn't know better, I'd say this was alive and fighting you! What has to be bad in this? How can you take Christianity's thought and twist it back again?

Evolution. She's created, not evolved. How's--AAAH! Okay you're right it's fighting me. I'll get you, bug!

The Dreams show me a hand holding a black eraser.

Evolution, creation. Nihilism, god's plan. Dom, sub. What's missing?

Third option. Third option how? Another plan. Just as infinite, but...her and your plan? From the end of time you came back in time to make yourselves that's the part of her...that's causing all of this...the seed-ghost! It's a ghost because it hasn't happened yet, but it still can have effects! Usually ghosts go the other way, they're dead but still keep doing stuff, but seed-ghosts are the opposite! That makes you unstoppable! You already won if she's here at all! Okay I want one.

You know I think I've been waiting like twenty years for you to say that? Let's rock and roll, dolly, we've only had one kid all night, we're slipping bad! Or like a whole army. But that was just one seedpod!

The Dreams show--

What's that mean? Paradise showed me an apple, all eaten. Oh I ate the fruit, but the seeds got left. Does that mean I can't have one?

It means you ate this dreamskin all up and didn't implant from it. Maybe Boobsong's not right for you, but I kind of think she is.

I'm in love with you. My heart's not giving up so I'm saying it. It's been pounding me since the moment you picked up on my interest and going louder every second. I can't have one of them because I have you! Oh my fuck that's presumptuous--forgot my rule oops, what happens now, will you punish me? No, you're a softie--oh. Um...I guess I remember I'm your sub now!

And your reward for remembering that is I let you off the hook for your rule this time, and your reward for being so hardcore through all of this so far is a screaming orgasm when we get your head back enough to really enjoy it. We're getting close, I think.

Okay then hurry up I want that orgasm! AAH--okay that's just attacking me, I wasn't even doing anything!

Another flash of Sparkledust, then a cartoon rainbow like a Lisa Frank sticker.

Uncle thank you, I'm sure we be back again, but I guess we're being flitty humans for this. See you in a bit!

Don't think of it imposing. You were barely here, in my eyes!

[Vision: hearts]

I zip us back to the Mechanical Heart's dance floor, bend my eravahk between my hands like the riding crop it is.

"I'm Rainbow Brite and Strawberry Shortcake. Are you trying to imagine me in black leather?"

She puts her head down and covers her face with her hands and peeks at me through embarrassed fingers.

"Maybe...you don't have any, do you. Except that one thing. That's not leather, though. Take me back to see it, it's there, right? You know the one I mean?"

"On your knees, you silly, you still just remembered I'm your--title, can you guess it? Still on your knees though."

My face is one solid giggle but I point my eravahk imperiously.

"Check the floor out real good. You don't have to like lick it or anything gross, you know I don't do that stuff, but I want you to see it good. This one's important. Yes I know the one you mean and yes it's there, and oh yes you'll be seeing it."

This is so healing doing that made me feel so young and fun. It brought back the voice I found when I marked Boobsong's face, but there's more heart in it, this time.

She kneels, on the other side of Boobsong, who I look down at, still frozen. Click, and Boobsong flows up into my arms again.

"Is that better, dolly? I know this floor gets so spicy." I murmur loudly, caring but obvious, and Copper glances up before bending down with her ass up to check the floor out.

What!? This floor is wonderful! Super warm and spicy good like cinnamon hot chocolate!

"Oh. Well I want to hold my dolly now but you can have the cinnamon hot chocolate for your feet back soon."

Copper listens intently to us, but keeps inspecting the floor. She looks up at me again, reflexively slave-poses, starts to look at the floor again and then goes back.

"This is how I sit for you. You make all of us--how many do you have--seven? How do you keep track of us? That's not the way it works, hehe, you're the dominant--no, title, Princess. You kept saying Princess to remind me! This is an ancient feudal thing. Handmaidens. You're the Princess, I'm your handmaiden. Handmaidens keep the Princess safe. We take your orders, yes, but mostly we're your guards and helping hands. Why did I accept that life...because the sex is wonderful, and you blew my mind away every fifteen minutes! I couldn't get enough of this! Okay and I guess it really does feel good down here."

She gets back in proper slave pose.

"Go. You--"

The Dreams show me a literal cocksleeve, and then a bunch of steampunk pipes and gauges.

"Your name that you forgot is your reward for this but you have to get the gender thing. It's on the other side of that. You're in the right place to remember it, though. Can you remember my gender?"

"You're a cocksleeve. I'm not, but you are, how's that work? Oh you're a switch, duh. Cocksleeve is a submissive female archetype. People don't have genders outside Earth, just collections of archetypes. Bimbo is another one you like. And...Witch and Girl are mine, and I have some Cocksleeve just a little in your hands. Boobsong is all Cocksleeve, except for Dragon. Okay what's my name then. Did I get the gender thing?"

"Good girl," I stroke her face with my eravahk's tip. "You have to guess your name, but I gave you all the pieces. Just wire them up right."

"I knew it. I'm...wire it up...wire it up...COPPER! You named me after wire, because to you that stuff is magic! And green is significant. You have a copper roof on your castle, that must have been expensive--"

"Actually I bought it at the lumberyard in Presque Isle Maine, I'm pretty sure. You're very very close now. Do you understand that floor yet? What's it made out of?"

"Copperwood, and that pinched--it's gone! Copperwood's like Boobsong! It's alive but it's machine life! The trees are made of clockwork! You wanted me to see this because...I'm...beautiful, like machine life, not natural. You said that I'm electric--hehe my kisses shock you! You were surprised that first time by the airplane, but you really fast got into it! You can actually touch high voltage wires and you said my kisses feel that way! Okay I feel good now. Zzzap MUAHAHAH!"

"Okay one last thing. Wait, is that your thing, not Steve Jobs'? You're friends with him!? What am I saying, of course you are, you're Starlight Princess that's your show you're--okay wait a minute. How the hell did you get Disney to make porn of you? I'm making that up, aren't I?"

Okay, Dreams, the beautiful, epic thing to happen now, would be if Walt just for no reason at all walked in and proved it to her because there's Pleiades. So I know you have something better in store but that's where my imagination gets.

Lights thud on suddenly, and Copper looks up.

"Well, there goes our surprise party."

"You know there's no point surprising her."

"Oh Rada already did that one. She knows the party's comin', and what's inevitable. Have your fun with decorations, but she's due back at the castle before midnight, or you all turn into pumpkins!"

"Are you guys really out there? Those must be holograms, they haven't moved a muscle since Walt came in!"

"Oh, hehe, I think they're just surprised to see us here."

"Booooobsqueeze, come get your present now!"