4 - The Only Winning Move

Energize rabbit fun. Horny toy available any time. Rub goes off when the yellow shirt fails. Yellow shirt is her battery. Find the battery hatch on her under-arm. Two batteries inside her now. Third battery inside your purse. Find batteries everywhere. Effects with different types. Charger see special friend. Giving soft hurry hint when new squeeze off.

New beat fun. Holding inside of her is battery source. Beating and hurting her, new squeeze off, will hurry up battery.

Horny roster fun. Give a motion to all creatures she can be. Battery obtained by each form gives effects. Form takes five pleasant juicings to make up a battery.

These are awesome-sounding games and exactly, precisely what I was thinking of, which is the clue.

Trembling, needy painful memory unfolds from a place in my heart that's clenched like a fist bleeding from its nails cutting into its palm.

It's been written all over her this whole time and I hate myself for anything being able to make me forget it...no. I didn't forget. It got turned into a nightmare of not being able to take care of her right and my heart clenched around it like this to protect me from the horror of not being able to do right by her. The lie told to me that did it was so simple, so small, and it's no wonder as soon as we started here the Rl'yeh Sade plunged me into the most intense demonstration of the truth I could possibly take, and now knowing that I have that feeling you get after getting used really hard that says you had better not have failed to get everything you wanted out of that just to keep from leaving me with a few new cracks.

Rl'yeh Sade--not the Dreams as a whole this time, because Rl'yeh Sade in particular is the one that doesn't let silly stuff like not tearing your soul apart get in the way of your deepest, truest joy, show me a bottle of the superglue I build RC planes with when I think that, about the cracks, and I feel weepy, want to run my hands over myself like that'd somehow let me feel the seams, because what they were doing with that squeezy force through every part of me while we were statues was holding all the pieces of me in place while the glue set.

Earth's mythology and a lot of other ones seem to cast Rl'yeh Sade as hell, and it makes people scared of it in a really boring way instead of the fun way it wants you to be. Maybe Sex's freakouts for 'simple' things seem silly to me because Boobsong and me have been to the real hell, the one where stuff like what happened to our most important kink happens.


7,000,037 years ago

"COOL!"

"WOW how big is that it must have space for EVERYONE like the whole planet Earth could fit I bet!"

It feels like we're at the Science Museum and looking at stuff at the gift shop and buying astronaut ice cream all at once times a million billion trillion (trillion comes after billion) maybe even quadrillion because I'm riding Heartsong who's turned into a pony right now and we've just come out of a cave to see the biggest Space Shuttle ever on its launch crawler. Heartsong is right, it must be like Unicron's space shuttle or something because it looks bigger than I can even understand.

"Fly up, let's go see!"

FLAP!

This is one of the coolest things we've ever found in the Four Dreams, but it's SO BIG it'll take us forever to explore or even get there this way!

"Prah closer!"

PRAH! Wait where are we I didn't mean to go anywhere inside!

We're in the elevator of the launch tower, and it's going up! COOLER THAN COOL! It's not tall enough for me to be riding Heartsong so the Dreams put me beside her standing up when they moved where we were going.

That means this will be cooler than just getting closer, but how can it not be?

Outside--hey wait, that's Earth! We can see it through the window of the elevator, through the launch tower frames going by outside.

"Turn into a girl again and hold my hand."

Chaaaaaange there. Where hand take it.

I walk up to the window and put my face against the glass.  We're going up REALLY FAST! Right outside the close frames are a blur. I thought the big ones far away were just the elevator shaft but they're not they're the real launch tower. It has to be really fast, though, because to the other side from the Earth I can see the shuttle's open cargo bay door with it's blinking warning lights like the radio tower on Green-top Colleen carried me down to get to Maine from the Strawberry World and if you look at two things right next to each other you can see how big they are and this Space Shuttle really is big enough to put the whole Earth in its cargo bay, so that means we have to go like mach fifty to get to the top before I'm old and grey!

Suddenly the Space Shuttle zooms by so fast it looks like it's normal-size and we get to the top and the doors open on a huge mission control center with mainframe screens and control panels and big windows looking out over the Space Shuttle and Earth.

I run right in with Heartsong, because why NOT it's the Four Dreams. Cool, all the control panels are even kid-sized! That means we can play with them! As we get close, a control station with two mainframe screens in the middle of the room suddenly transforms like a Transformer and the screens fold down and out to make a table that lowers down into the floor to be in a little pit with stairs all around going down and in the middle of it is--weird that's hard to see! It looks clear like crystal but so perfectly clear it looks like it's made of the world instead of being made of glass or something. It's shaped like a square kind of tapered pillar with a pyramid on top.

Suddenly there's a Federation computer beep and voice:

"Preparing Earth to depart for the Four Dreams."

Then an alarm sound!?

"Launch control pillars five through sixy-nine--"

Lots of error beeping.

"Cannot install launch pillars. Emergency. Install pillars manually."

Red alert sirens sound! Before I can get too scared the Dreams show me the part from Transformers where Spike is being carried into an acid pit and he's telling Daniel to knock down the acid cover by transforming his exo-suit into a gun--

"Hammerform, Heartsong, quick!"

Tail up yay you're grabbing it changefasthurry HAMMER!

As soon as she's ready to swing the Dreams show me a cute My Little Pony with a bow on her head like I have getting down to jump high, and then a light shines out above the weird kind-of-invisible pillar OH THAT'S A LAUNCH PILLAR OKAY!

Don't fail me now, wings! I foomph them out and run at the pillar and instead of going down the stairs jump up and flap so we'll fly across and raise Heartsong over my head yell YAAAAH! and hit the top of the pillar where the light is as hard as I can and it's weird instead of squishing down like a cartoon or smashing or going in like a nail it kind of splashes out from where I hit and shines with bright brilliant light then seems to harden and like go sideways to every dimension like Prah-ing with Heartsong sometimes and disappear--


I'm not saying Earth is hell, but it sure can be when stuff like our game being twisted that way happens. I think it's wrong to make people live in a place where stuff like that can happen when the Dreams exist, but if I could just wave my wand and make a candy that'd turn all those worlds into parts of the Dreams we wouldn't be in this mess. What Rl'yeh Sade has been telling me, though, is that this isn't Earth, and it's safe here to play games like we're doing with Sex right now, and that here you can be as vulnerable as we were standing there in Happy Chains and even the selfish possessiveness of strangers like Sex here will lead you to happiness--and tables that turn so deliciously for everyone. They say mostly doms play the scenes they want to have done to them, and what did Sex do with Boobsong and me?

Now I want my game back. Not The Game as in the one Boobsong made for me, my game, as in the game I was. I've been making the wish for it this whole time, by what I've been planning for Sex when we're done with this, and I could just say Rl'yeh Sade I wish now, but there's a better way. Rl'yeh Sade I'm making my wish by the game I'll be making Sex play after this. I trust you to sort out what's me playing the scene I want to have done to me, from just my getting off on the idea of having Sex as a cute little trinket I keep and wind up for a few minutes of fun when it amuses me, or to show off to my friends.

...and now we'll find out if I'm wrong about that last not being a part of the scene I want to have done to me. I really don't want it to be, but the thing that makes Rl'yeh Sade so scary and hot is, if I'd get off enough on the violation of having it happen anyway, even as a temporary thing, Rl'yeh Sade the Deep Haven or Loving Abyss or however else you want to fail at translating its name into English won't let me miss out on it just because it has to rape me into it.

Rl'yeh Sade (I feel it come to the foreground out of all the Dreams gently touching my mind) responds with a psychic vision of...a Cray 1 supercomputer. Huh? I mean okay Rl'yeh Sade is definitely super at computing this kind of thing and at the end of Sneakers Michael Douglas had to play statue-almost to get past a security system in a room that had a Cray 1 in it, but I've never known Rl'yeh Sade to fuck my mind that little at a time like this.

Royal seer interpreation, flip.

I see very strong old beat up machines getting nicely fixed and made into displays that you can try them in. What if this is us right here? Classic computer that got really harmed and the Dreams found it in this shipping box and said this is too precious to sit away hiding here and they fixed it and sent it to a place that's as nice as our living room for Sex will be and people can come see our museum display?

The warming water of thawing soul like when I retook my Sugarfeast Fairy power seems to flow through my heart and I shake, weepingly, the key heavy in my hand, feeling like such a stupid slut to have thought I was making bedroom eyes and shaking my tits because I want to get held down and fucked when what I was just doing is moaning because I'm already bent over the table with the cock halfway inside me. Yes, I'm making the wish of the scene I want to have done to me, and Rl'yeh Sade has been letting me because expressing myself by begging this way is part of what I need from this, but it's would have happened without all that, or rather, there was no way I was ever going to not do it this way, nor can I stop, even knowing now. No matter what I say about what I mean by what after this, I and Rl'yeh Sade will know what's actually true about this game, and even if I didn't now owe it to Sex to finish what I began with her, how could I stop doing a scene so sexily awesome that everyone in it is loving so deeply? I was trapped from the very first moment of thinking it'd be hot if this squeezing force got tighter--well, okay, probably a long time before that.

I don't want to be wind-up, but somehow I know Rl'yeh Sade has something way kinkier in store anyway. I'm making squishy-sub eyes at you, Deep Haven. Mindfuck me with foreshadowing or let me squirm wondering, just make it fun.

It shows me the hook you use to hang a Heartwarming Wreath on your front door when the season comes...holy sparkling mulled cider, that's got implications. I could read Boobsong's interpretation, and if you fuck me with more clarity I can't stop you, Rl'yeh Sade, but I'm going to enjoy squirming on the teasy dick of just what that means--AAH! Heartwarming, the next holiday after that is Sugarfeast! Dreams wait I can't be in a museum I know you'll take care of me and we won't just be a statue and stuff but Dreams I'm not done there are still four more monoliths and I have to get back we have to get finding them please it was so much fun and that was the real reason to do it but don't let our work--

They show me the hook again, and then a hanging bundle of colorful Sugarfeast baubles like you you RRRGH what did those mean they're my mistletoe but this is me it's not kissing something else like my candy does--it's not important right now. The feeling is what's important, because the rest of the vision is Boobsong's face looking kindly up at me as I melt down into sobbing, and the turning four-sided shape of the monolith made of the vision.

The last four monoliths are here, in this strange distant future where my whole world is a memory, because the last experience to bang into the dry cracked sadness of Earth's foundations, is the peace of being finished and having nothing to worry about, not the very smallest thing, ever again, so permanently and totally that you'd have to just be a statue that can feel the easy peace of its existence, and yet still getting to be yourself and enjoy the things you love. It's not in the vision but it's woven through this whole thing, what I'm supposed to think about how it can possibly be that they can still help a world that's a memory so long lost a Venus as nerdy as Sex here with all the libraries and archives of Isla Virgo to hand couldn't find it until she got herself into this predicament. That's not something I get to see. My job is to be me, and enjoy being in the reality the Dreams present to me. That's the only way I've ever found a monolith, I can remember that part. Accepting it feels wonderful, like sliding down onto a very needful cock with strong hands putting me right where I'm supposed to be when I'm all nicely ready and wet and slippery inside, so it feels like my body is unresisting water around it okay yeah it's a good thing the place to get that charger is from Isht Visht and Mama because after this all I'm going to need to at least give a few blowjobs.

I could swear someone I know called that having a cigarette, when after some really intense topping you need to (neat, this is a teehee now) unwind by sucking dick, but I can't remember them. Yet, I think with resolve.

Now, with all of that in mind, we have the context of where I am and who I am and what kind of fun I'd be into for the really important question I have, the one about the thing that was the center of everything.

Seed-ghost, status of Succubus game.

Waiting to open fist.

The first thing I can remember how hot it was the first time she told me about it. It be fun to just open her to the page and relive that, but it's important I remember this, I think, because like I feel that icy-warm melt of healing like taking up Sugarfeast again and imagining being a museum piece when I remember about this.

Moving those frozen, shredded fingers feels like grinding them the rest of the way to bloody slush, but when I get the hand to open--memories erupt, a tangled whirlwind--

She turned me into a goddess by making me need people to worship me or I just become an idol of myself. It bursts out of my heart like an orgasm of exploding out from being trapped under ice in a frozen lake and my heart races alright and I almost cum standing there with my clit pressed between me and Boobsong--FUCK!

Down on your knees silver priestess YOU GET YOUR HEAD TO THE FLOOR AND PRAY YOUR PRIESTESS DEDICATION PRAYER TO ME RIGHT NOW!

SSssnnugling against every part of you move down my goddesses' shapely soft midsection holding onto her clit for a sec and just stroking it slightly with my fingertips as I let go to put my hands on the floor out in front of me and lay my head facefirst in between your feet and raise up my ass to show how my tail is just standing straight up like a horny cock saying fuck me please.

Please take your succubus to serve and devotedly pleasure your every desire Goddess of Sugarfeast--

Hands up above my head making heart-sign.

--Rainbow Bright Starshine! Make me be your toy that you play with to pleasure yourself and--

Let a moment pass while I shake my hips super sexually.

--turn me into your sex doll just to see my face as I realize it's happening and let me stay like that for a million years if that would please you best and never ever play with me except because you're wanting me in that moment. Hold me as a doll you keep otherwise, take me everywhere, never put me down. I will do anything if you give me that, this is my solemn oath. May the Dreams uphold me in my promise and spike me hard if I waver the slightest bit, I wish with all my heart please hear me Dreams.

My breath comes in ragged gulps, prickles stand out on my arms and legs even though I don't have body hair, my clit stands like an iron rod over the heart-shape her hands above her head are making. I was desperately low on worship, about to idolize, leaving Sex so long, and not making Boobsong do anything. I've been getting away with this so far because it was Sex's worship that woke me up in the first place, and she didn't stop worshipping, just fell in line when her goddess started commanding her.

That's a turn-on becuase I like being a statue a lot, and because being turned into one the way it happens for me is incredible. I described what was happening before, but what no words can reach is how good every part felt. The most incredible hunger flowed through my limbs as the force that was just holding me still came inside and made me a statue, an itch to have it go through each part of me I'm not even sure needing cock and then getting it is better than--and that was just that one phase. I'd have to need it lots, at least.

Sliding my clit into Boobsong's mouth, which is going to happen soon, is truly incomparable, though. Just a little more...

So that's the trap. I get lots of warning in the form of both feeling unworshipped and the fact that idolizing takes a good, sexy, enjoyable long time during which my mind is free to order Boobsong down on her knees like that and bring me back, but, it's very hard to get me to once you get me there!

So all that's fun and nice, but it's not the important thing, just the urgent one.

On the way to feeling the almost-dry lake of fire in my heart, I saw the whirlwind reassemble itself into the game we played, the game Boobsong is the way I'm a game of Goddess for her to play.

Boobsong is my Succubus. Yes of course she's su'khora, but when we went through the worldgate the first time to that bizarre world that could throw javelins to the moon and bring them back again but had never seen a working black mirror, and I smiled see people shriek in dismay at Boobsong, we were surprised that instead of AAAAH DRAGON it was AAAAH DEMON! What was scary about a familiar spirit? The answers to that question as we grew should have offended bitterly, but somehow, just like Dragon in the Strawberry World, they entranced us.

When we were Unveiled and it was time for sex, our seed-ghost made us the most incredible game out of the weird distortion of Boobsong's real race Earth knew by the name Succubus.

And then, most importantly, gave us no choice about whether to play it. That gave it the force to shape our life instead of just being something we took out for special occasions. That gave it teeth and show us how good being bitten so you can barely move can feel.

Literally. This is where my Goddess game came from, the inspiration it gave Boobsong.

Here's the game. Boobsong's my Succubus. She's su'khora, an emovore, yes, but as luxhi'khora she's hardwired into my heart like my blood pumps in her veins instead of her breathing for herself. As long as I'm alive, so is she, always feeding with my light all around her.

But the game of attracting sexual attention to keep moving is fun, whether you're the one giving it or inspiring it, so our seed-ghost made us a toy version, just like a radio control airplane, to play with, because though we were old enough for each other, at twelve we were still kids really.

...right?

In my RC club on Earth there was an airline pilot who decided to take up model planes. He practiced every weekend for the five years I flew with that club, and never graduated to solo flight, even though he flew full-size airplanes for a living, because if you make the plane six times smaller, everything it does happens six times faster, and flying an RC plane your "instruments" are the sound of the engine and what it looks like it might be doing from way down below, not a cockpit full of avionics that costs as much as my crown.

And if the plane is coming toward you, left and right are backwards.

To me, all that is what I loved about RC. Watching the aerobatics I was doing happen from the outside of the plane was the point.

Our game of Succubus is like that.

Boobsong is a Succubus and runs on Lust, like this is a video game and there's magic points. She can fill her lust from anyone who gets off on her, but normally only mine is allowed to fill her. I can command otherwise...or not even give her mine.

In our game, a full charge of lust lasts her between thirty seconds and ten minutes. The harder she's working, the faster it runs down. If she wants to keep going, she has to flirt and exhibit and seduce and stop to do sexy things in the middle of whatever other command she had, make sure every toy handed to me comes with squeezed-out cleavage, every moment walking dances. If she runs out, she goes through a sexy-feeling dollification that leaves her paralyzed but posable, she can even walk or crawl if I drag her along with my leash or hands on her body, but even though she's alive and awake and her mind is fully there, even though the real power supply I give her that keeps her alive is fully online, she can't move a muscle, or follow any command beyond being read.

It's a game, though. If I play music, she can sing along, just as loud as I want, lust or not.

The game goes all the way. The letters of her book I read "glow" with phosphorescence charged from my lust like leaving a glow in the dark toy in the sun, but after a day or so even they'll go dark bit by bit until eventually all I can read of her is her cocksleeviest lustful thoughts, and then not even those, and she really seems like a doll, and she sleeps.

Her unreally-smooth skin and metal hair and bouncy heartstone flesh all ride the edge between doll and real so when she's stopped she seems like a spookily-cutely alive doll and when she moves she'll seem like a freakishly doll-like girl.

When she sleeps like that, though, I want her back so bad I could scream, so she never stays there long.

The almost-best part, though, both of our favorite rule but one, is that she has a...kind of terrible sense of how much lust she has left, especially since it's dramatically variable and she can just glitch at dramatically appropriate moments and find herself suddenly out of lust when I've just filled her.

And then I can have my fun. Or leave her as cutesy-hot and humiliated monument to her little fuckup. Or...it's awesome. This isn't a game about keeping her going. It's a game about bouncing off this limit like it's the fourth wall we're fucking up against.

There are all sorts of little subtleties. Tormenting her sadistically fills her lust at something like ten times the speed of just fooling around, but only works if I find the monstrous thing inside me that'll get a pulse of sexy joy from smacking her ass so it echos or twisting her nipples until she squeaks AAAH DOLLY IS MOVING NOW (it really helps that that's so cute, but makes her seem so strong). Sometimes she's harder to get moving than others and I have to work myself up until I'm in danger of fucking her then and there. It's a constant minefield of fun little stuff.

Our favorite rule is this, though: if I let her run down just to get off on seeing her go helpless, or giving her a command she'll need to stop and flirt to get through and then cruelly not paying attention, she'll stop and be a doll, and it's all very kinky. Same if she messes up and runs out before she means to. If, however, I just use her and finish what I wanted and let her just run the extra lust out, I get punished for using her wrong.

With her suffering.

Huh? Yes. She can hold me when I'm literally a sentient big bang and take the pain with joy, but the way she gets cold in those instances is the saddest thing in the entire multiverse, battery acid and toothpicks instead of the brutal-yum capsaicin spice of sadism, and it makes me feel terrible. She gets slow and shivery and looks miserable and feels miserable and I want to die for not taking care of her right. She can warm back up with attention and lust and be fine, but...the poor thing. There's nothing worse than seeing my dolly sad like that. Spank me with carpet staples while I kneel on a bed of loose Legos, rather than that.

So when I'm done using her, every time, if she has any lust left, I carefully "put her cap back on" by commanding her to lose all her lust like she'd glitched and dropped it. Doing that turns it into snuggly warmth that makes being dolled comforting and safe-feeling. Even a single drop left will keep her warm for hours.

It's hard to explain how important that is. It's the thing that makes us be player and plaything, not just lovers doing a roleplay. It leaves no out. We can't be nice. Boobsong has to be a remote-control dolly I power up with lust to play how I want, and then be clicked off and put away like one of my airplanes. There's no cheat of just keeping her charged and using that to make it like she's just a horny friend.

I remember a time, autumn, Earth, out walking, holding her, in doll form because she couldn't walk with me if I wanted to space out and think about dreary cosmic life instead of keeping her charged, which I did that day. I wasn't ignoring her. We chattered and she sang along to my music and we hung out, I just wasn't feeling horny enough to keep her going continuously through a walk.

We came to a pile of leaves and her pleading to kick them and throw them around is still one of the cutest things she's ever done. I smacked her ass and made out with her until she was buzzing, then made her big and set her in the leaves and watched her kick them around and smile at me and pause every minute or two to show off bent over or come close and snuggle suggestively. She got stuck mid-toss, and I teased her silly pose a little before playing with her exposed pussy-lips enough to let her keep going.

And then we were done and I grabbed her and commanded her small and held her and capped her and she sat in my arms warm and cuddly on that cold day with all the peace of all the Dreams in our hearts, walking on and still hanging out.

This one little rule lets us have our life together, but forces us to drink every drop of it from the cup of player and toy, we get no other vessel to have it in, and that lets us relax totally into this shape. Either you think that's creepy and weird or horrifying, or you and your heartchild think we're sweet to imagine many people would share our freaked-out kinks, or you just implanted by reading that.

Also, if Boobsong's run down, and I idolize--that's what running out of worship is called--so I can't move to start her up again, the only thing to helplessly do is watch me slowly become entirely stopped like in Happy Chains. Then we're dependent on people like Sex right here to wake me up again, or the Dreams spiking me.

...and Sex isn't going to be doing any worshipping just yet and I don't want to move Boobsong now. How am I doing? Warm feeling happiness inside says that filled me up just now. I get a longer time than Boobsong, but still not long, that I can carry at once. Maybe several hours, sometimes, often, less, something changes it, something I can keep doing to extend my run between worshipping, I can..oh fuck...take sacrifice. Boobsong's pain, or keeping Sex from cumming for a few windings yet, would make me go a good long time, something they give up for me to stay...ooohh screaming fizzdropping flavor dots in a deep fryer she made me have to beat her up to sleep through a night and be able to wake up again!

There's a story suggesting itself, something I'm not sure if it's memory or just my horny mind going, that all throughout the Dreams are terribly lifelike statues and dolls of us--

Oh. Oh that's right. I don't sleep in beds. I just get idolized, and fall asleep like that, and when our rest is done and I've dreamed and thought and held Boobsong quietly and am satisfied to stop right there, that's the end, that story's done. Then we go another place where a worshipper with a statue that could be us prays the prayer Sex here did--do we not have a home to take Sex to? Have we ever been just relaxing, not being Sugarfeast Goddess Rainbow-Bright Starshine and her handmaiden Boobsong? Are we finished yet? I'm so tired, please--

Memories of the Camp, a vacation spot in a nice place in Rl'yeh Sade with fun things around and Mama and Isht Visht taking care of me, surface, and tears spring up. I was there, sometime, after The End somehow...it was indescribably beautiful, comforting, Boobsong piling up everything that ever made me feel happy and free and at rest, built around a reimagining of the camp at Grand Lake on Earth my family stayed at in the summertime.

There was a bench there, just right to fuck on, with a pot that held Johnny Jump-ups, our favorite flower, to sit and look at the water and the more Johnny Jump-ups growing in the grass around it, or just the right height to kneel Boobsong on the bench and take her from behind as my fucking pushed her face into the pot of flowers.

Before that and the abyss of time that passed during this last time idolized can come together in my head and destroy me, the Dreams show me a TARDIS. It can be any time, and anywhere, ten million years in the future like this or far in the past, we wake up, so don't be scared of not getting back there--how though? I don't have any worshippers there, and it's hidden...

Because Mama can. She can call for me and I'll wake up tied to her couch-room wall with Boobsong ready waiting to help me down, and Mama will keep me there for a while and see my wish to get busy with vacationing and take me out to the shore in my picture frame and get off with me under pretty stars while I writhe and squirm in her tidy rope, and then let me out to have my fun. We'll stay until it's just too hard to resist that softly hard arranging that makes sleep as a statue so erotic and relaxing, and become the Sugarfeast Goddess and her handmaiden again.

Dreams I'm still so tired. Can I know there's an end? Can somehow idolizing and sleeping just wake up at the Camp again one day or something? That's insane, these adventures are wonderful, and yet...

Sex (the girl), and a finish line.

Sex is the end?

Then I sob with whatever the solemn opposite of heartbreak is. Ungrateful bitch, Rainbow, look what you have here! Dreams I...Sex is going to cum and cum and cum, and if just the emotions don't literally bring her off I'm going to damn well arrange for it, when she realizes just what a gift she is. My mind explodes with all the ways to set our alarm clock I can think of just in these few moments before I get what I'm waiting for with Boobsong. I can idolize any time now, just to feel it happen. Even if she wouldn't in a heartbeat promise and wish for a spiking to scare the dark, I don't think my whole extended star-family including dad would be able to stop her fulfiling her fetish with Boobsong and me sooner or later.

The question isn't whether she'll be good for this, it's what the very sexiest way to implement it is!

...and if we're not quite done being the Sugarfeast Goddess and her handmaiden, well, everyone forgets to set their alarm sometimes...

And then all this theology and thinking of alarm clocks raises other memories from another life and I'm pretty sure I have a handle on what's frozen in Sex's ice and why it connects to her keyhole (oooh snuggly pillowdrops how satisfying to have that not be a euphemism and yet be hornier than if I was talking about her pussy). This is going to be delicate...but that's boring right now, and my handmaiden's just about where I want her, it's time for the fun stuff.

Am I getting too low on worship to do this just yet? Still nice and full, and it's a horny soft thing to have to check like that. I feel good to have this need, even though needing other people to like me terrifies me.

Without even raising my hand, I click eyes here on my eravahk--there's a reason her dedication prayer says what it does about seeing the look on her face.

Raise my head and look up at you with my eyes half-mast very sexily.

The smile seeing her like this spreads across my face is as inescapable as anything the goddess game does to me.

Well, handmaiden, here we are again, isn't this nice?

But I don't make her answer me for a moment, just to savor the passiveness of her mind. Lust runs down much more slowly when she's just sitting there, that's why I was able to muse so long and have her still able to look up.

In a normal relationship I might say something like "very nice worship by the way, filled me right up", but there's no need, like she said in her training guide, and moreover, it feels good in a way not to.

Oops, it's happening I think, better focus on the experience.

(talking to statued Sex has got me over the cumbersome book metaphor, I just move Boobsong's mind like it was my own)

My head feels weak but because I'm moving it just a little bit runs down the last. There my body goes, still soft peace filling everything, muscles stopped and can't move again.

My eyes half mast going down and then up this feels so good I can't--YES you're really letting me I can't take orders now! I can feel the part of me that responds to them just stop like wheels that slow down very suddenly. My face is just showing all of this, I can still move a bit from my neck up and when orders go I feel so wet it makes my eyes get big and horny like an orgasm and that's all I can do I can't make horny sounds or anything so that makes me feel wetter than ever now and I put my tongue up soft like to suck you off because it feels good and my mouth is wide from feeling this so it's perfect if you want to use me next as a cocksleeve toy either way you'll get a nice hole to use no matter which you pick. Here it goes again my face is stopping next. Muscles that keep holding back my heavy head feel such weight on them I can barely keep this up but I will I don't have choice in that--it feels wonderful having no free will you should really try it some oh wait you have. As my face goes soft and peaceful stuck in this cocksleeve face I feel so beautiful it makes me want to be like this eternally. I know you'll wake me up again but really would be fine if you never did. I like that thought. I like to think that I'm just this pretty toy you carry everywhere--here's the last of it! Oh please neck please go it's so tiring to keep holding it while I'm running down aaaand there it goes AAaaaah so relaxing to be dolled again!

Now keep holding me. That's all I ask of you. The only thing I need is that.

I'll just keep waiting here for eternity. My head is empty now. Just empty-pussy head.

...and her mind fills with a soft quiet like the end of a record. I can keep focusing her on the experience, but the experience is silence now.

Which is the point of this, so I hold her to give her some conscious time of just being a sexy doll looking so. Beautiful.

[sense of the vacation camp]

Exactly what I want to see.