5 - No Light No Light

How am doing? Am (this is so hot) running down? Still nice and full.

Are you okay in there? Your light is very strange.

Says the yellow giant with the rainbow photosphere, I dreamtalk-smile to Auntie and glance out the window. I'm just emotional, doing fine.

Okay, well, I'm here if you need to talk.

Thanks, auntie--

I blink to myself, realizing how convenient this all is again. My scene is just paused until I do something. I can ask myself, do I need to talk? I'm horny to toy with Boobsong's mind while her pages still glow, and burning to wind up Sex and start doing things, and I need to cum--oh. OOH.

--it's just that I just remembered my whole goddess thing--

That's so wonderful! Are you going back to that? I think your pet will cum from it!

Actually that's what I wanted to ask you, I have a scene in mind for her, but I'd need to be SO ANNOYING to you for a sec--

Eee I'll set 'em up you knock it down! You mean the shadow puppet game, right? You and me are a team with that, remember? Who's the brightest one in the family except the Fairy kid? You know my name!

Holy maple bacon proton soup Auntie I didn't even know I missed you! If I didn't want to stay near my pet right now I'd jump out this window with Boobsong and come give you a big hug! Yes, that game, will you play with me? I thought we'd use Boobsong for the shadow source to show her off.

As usual! I'm ready, just heat up a flare to signal me!

Joy and that warm sense of heart fragments melting together again and thawing flow through me as I realize I can remember my family some. We're all eccentric in some way, supergiants and white dwarfs with superstring filaments hanging off as tassels, and we're all huge drama queens (kings, etc) with names like mine, Hypergamma to Radio Ultrabrilliance (can you see why I translate that from Infernal as Rainbow Bright?). I'm the biggest one of us, not because I'm ancient or powerful (well, it makes me powerful), but because I'm (very happily) a mutant freak.

Auntie Lucifer here is basically, I remember vaguely, a nice old lady who sees humans as cute little gnats who have trouble with demiurges sometimes and tries to help when she can, and is always up for stupid games with little kids like me.

Thank you so much, I'll let you know--um, I'm going to destroy this box we're in. Is there anything you can see out there why I shouldn't?

Hum...can't keep it as a souvenir? That's the one your handmaiden made, remember that?

AAH THEN YES I'M KEEPING IT! I thought it was something else because it's blue inside!

Soft preciousness. Locks and chains applied with love make you feel precious. Boobsong loves me so dearly, to make me this and not even give me the chance to not be locked in.

That should be a nightmare, but it's beautiful, because these chains honor me.

They also turn me into the exact monster she wanted to eat her. I remember that, I think, whenever it feels like this is one-sided because all she does is service me.

There's another thing that's been orbiting me that's annoying me. Destroy that! Look, see here.

I peer out the window to see an old-looking space device of some kind, solar array and cylinder and struts, in the distance as she highlights it okay what the sweet swirly licorice redaction markers is Mir doing in one piece and definitely not deorbited, umpty million years in the future, orbiting Auntie Lucifer's Rl'yeh Sade side in mirrorspace in the Four Dreams and what new math would I have to send Sex to look up to measure how much of a coincidence this isn't?

Let me guess, you get spiked every time you try to flare it?

How'd you know? What is that thing?

In Soviet Russia, Scary Impossible Extradimensional Monster contain Grimdark Morally Grey Foundation--watch that be the actual meaning, but--ooh.

A can of ghosts from ancient Earth, right before the end.

Creepy fun! Can you claim it please? It's yours no doubt.

Can you stand it just a little longer? I'd like to impress my pet before I take it away.

Oh I'm just being a snob because it's not sexy like my gas ring and space stations on the other side. Take your time with it.

Thanks, Auntie. Okay, I need to prepare my scene. I'll signal soon.

Game if it'll take time please bring Mir near my box, but not where the window sees.

Knowledge: Moving Mir won't take long. My game will make decisions here, so do worry about it after this.

Hot guess I needed a little don't-worry-your-pretty-head, and yay.

Sweet cumming!

[Giggly grin]

Worship? Like maybe a pixel down. Full happy warmth inside of me.

...I need some more don't-worry-your-pretty-head, that taste made me all hungry. Do something, game?

Knowledge: keep on asking, if I want to have Sex awake in this box, or it takes the key.

Instant heartpounding arousal rush. Um...holy spikeproof gobstoppers. Boobsong is exempt from all kinds of things because she's mine. Sex is immune to none of that. I've been wondering if Wetpeace is actually sneakily a rewired copy of my game like Mama's is, but who cares, Sex is playing my game too as long as she's my priestess.

I glance at her--and she isn't there.

Knowledge: she's in my game's storage space with my other toys. It'll keep her there and put her back when the game decides I should wind her up.

The key is still in my hand. I look at it. The depth of what my game just did, simple as it is, woke something.

"Game, um, I think I'm a hungry Fairy right now. Can you decide for me if I should keep this key to hold my mind on it, or take it away, and I...it..."

I trail off, unable to express the need behind what I'm saying.

Knowledge: it isn't up to me what the game decides for me. It's deciding this way.

A pink sparkly tentacle from a hole to nowhere grabs the key and zips off with it--and the box goes dark as my game closes the window.

Okay but--

Knowledge: Here's some fun relaxing peaceful explaining how this actually works, in very simple terms so I'll feel dumb and stop expecting silly things like for the clock on being (it's using a merciful, patient voice on this) allowed to use my hands the way I had that key so long to just go and go without consequences. Yes the game ignored the rule to let me break it, to show me it will always get its way with me. Here I am, stupid toy goddess thinks she's doing really right, and all the while, there that key is. Shouldn't I have noticed that? There was very much to do it knows, but a lapse in holding me should be very hard to miss and make my blood run cold. I'm a Fairy, what will happen to me if my Keeper doesn't keep me held so tight it feels like being idolized? It was very dumb to not be scared by that. I'm stupid. Say that thrice. I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid. Too insanely dumb to have any chance of surviving without my game. I seem smart when it gives me things to fill that need, to be a pretty pet with cute tricks, but look at this how it sees things. It set me up and gave me toys. I played with them so hard I lost myself in that, so hard the part of me that screamed at me to put the key down or give it to Boobsong to hold couldn't get me out of the fantasy. To keep that from happening again, I have to play very dumb until Sex wakes up from me winding her. I can't keep anything in my hand at all, only touch and play with Boobsong. I can't be up above my knees--

Something grabs me hard around the waist, folds my legs up under me, and sets me down kneeling, then pull my feet up and ankle cuffs snake in place, cinch tight, then each leg is strapped down from its knee every hand-breath with soft cuffs around it to my tiptoes--I'm forced en-pointe by bars along the backs of my legs. I can shuffle, kneel, sit up, but standing is impossible, because even if I was tough enough for en pointe (oooh I'm not, I'm a huge wimp for pain), there would be no way to balance without my ankles moving. Wetly soft moans squeeze out as I feel them go in place, how I've needed this, help me down, game!

As if to answer that, I feel a crosspiece of steel or something cool and hard attach behind each ankle, and my legs are spread just enough to feel the air creep up my ass--that means butt-plug, right? Only air creeps up so I guess this punishment is only to keep my hairbrained Fairy self in line.

Something snakes around my face underneath my lips and feeling silky soft slides across my mouth to cover it, but nothing grows inside me, hardly fair.

Next pieces of hard rubbery stuff attack my ass--it's AAAH OW spanking OOH hard ERHAH wow that stung oh no cane zzzip AAAAAAAH! Fire burns across my cheeks as the line of springy wood keeps whacking hard and fast and I scream like the stupid Fairy idiot who forgot toy hands are for playing, not keeping stuff that I very am. Girly wails echo off the walls of my cage as it just keeps at me for a million years. Very hard wood impacts me and I start to feel life drain--


Holy fuck it spanked me unconscious. My ass is pounding like a kettle drum and burning hot, my head swims where it lays on the floor of the cage, and every breath is a terrible war with the way my body wants to keep still. The effort of moving just the tiniest bit takes me on a scary ride of flashing lights and booming sounds. There's nothing on my legs or mouth, or on my mound--my clit comes off, balls attached, suction-cupped like a dildo to my smooth sweet flesh above pussy lips with only smooth skin where my hole would be (I have a perfectly fuckable ass if you want to bend me down and fill me up), so this isn't a panic attack.

Underneath my head something soft lifts me up, and all around me it grows into a silky bed. Up and up we rise--I can feel Boobsong's weight press the mattress down just an inch away--until it feels like clouds surround us, softly where I hurt so bad, firmly where my weight can rest without sending me into screaming fits.

Knowledge: ballet splints are always there if I need them to help me feel small enough. I can ask, by standing up, or saying in a very cute voice to please help me have the proper view of what I am.

Light comes in, the window flares bright and Auntie sends me hugs. I can't answer back, it's too hard to think.

Straight ahead is Boobsong's face. Nectar! My handmaiden! Need flares up, but the half an inch between us could be a million miles the way I feel.

Please game, help, put her head where I can kiss nectar out of her mouth?

Knowledge: I can ask more nicely. Try again.

I'm a stupid Fairy slut. I thought I was on my own because my scene with Sex went well and forgot it was a game set up for me to make me feel better after learning how I let Boobsong down, and it hurt so bad I blocked it out of my own head even though Auntie saw. Help me now, game, please, with a very wet sad cherry on top? I can't keep myself. I'll just be scared and turn hard and cold. I was dumb and messed up and need your help now even more than I usually do. I'm sorry.

Knowledge: trying after that would be dumb.

am dumb, game! Please, please please with batting eyes if I could move them at all please would you give me her.

I can't speak out loud but I try to imagine it in soft breath pathetic submissive sexy cute whisper like Boobsong does.

Instead of moving her, I get moved, to slide straps around my legs again and put the ballet splits back on me.

I guess that's it then. If it wouldn't make me die from the pain I would cry pathetically.

My worship tank is halfway down, surprising. I thought it would be gone for sure after I was out so long.

I would keep fighting, but I'll die if I have to wear the spreader bar. I'll definitely idolize before I can move enough to take her on my own.

Boobsong moves closer until our faces touch, and further in, pushing our mouths carefully into each other. Her mouth is warm and soft. Just stick my tongue in, come on...like a creaking ancient ship I get it out, and feel her slippery tongue, and lick weakly--aaaaaahhh refreshment. I'll be back okay in no time, and I like these splints actually. This is already lots better. I don't even have to drink, her nectar is as urgent to help me as she is and absorbs into my tongue and heads off to fight the war to literally save my ass.

I had planned to hold my lust back and keep her dolled for an orgasm or three, but now I let the tiny flow I make trickle in unguardedly.

Game, would you please tell this stupid little Fairy in a way she can understand if she can at all why you helped her then and not when she was asking?

As if in response, my clit slides into Boobsong pussy and slowly strokes, filling me with dread that I'll cum before I'm fixed enough. I cum so hard, it breaks me a little anyway, so this is scary, but I'm still turned on.

(My clit being off doesn't make it stop being a part of me. A portal connects it to me, and I feel everything that happens wherever it is--which could be the other side of Rl'yeh Sade, and has been sometimes. I can summon it like Sex's key, but my game keeps back every use but on  Boobsong for it to decide about)

You're doing it, huh, game.

The stroking slows, teasing, but I'll get fixed enough before I cum, I think.

The splints disappear disappointingly, but I couldn't have enjoyed them anyway.

Knowledge: this is when it's bad. How can I think it would ever take away its whole point? She will always be ready there for me, and the game will make sure I have enough sex to make it feel erotic to be a toy Fairy even when I'm down like this. When I'm up and ready to have fun, I'll always be edged toward things that would give us fun sex to have and interesting scenes to try. How can it be so obvious and I still don't understand? I am stupid, dumb, an idiot, to have thought the game had anything else it planned, than making every minute of my life as full of sexy fun with Boobsong as I made Sex's turning all her time awake into edging class. Do I not see how an idiot would notice it making me have sex with Boobsong all my life like that? Yes, each fun thing I try is because I want to, choose it, command Boobsong and take my hands and play with her, but I only have the choice of what to play! Not keep up with her sexual needs or not--or mine. It's been choosing me have sex with Boobsong for me all this time, just the same as if it took my clit off my mound and slid it in her pussy like this. To think it won't do that just because I have some silly thought that's taking power I should have, is stupid beyond imagining. I never had that. I never will. Relax and let her play with me, I'm the toy and she the one who plays, except the game she chose is handmaiden, and here she is. You have to play that game the right way, so she has no way out, but did I decide goddess was my thing to be? Who said be Sugarfeast Fairy? Not me, her! It's time to be aware of that, so I'm going to have the splints when Sex wakes up and have to keep wearing them as she helps me feel Boobsong up. Here I cum, be ready now.

Exploding pressure fills my clit up with hot juicy cum, my body arches pointlessly against her snuggly perfect frame and screams with pain that's getting less but still hurts bad, while the game keeps my clit pushed deep inside her pussy until the very last ragged breath has breathed out of me around her mouth where she lies--I've been letting lust engorge her soul, but making her keep still so not to use it up. She can store a bit this way, but only just minutes more than if I let her move. The splints come back, snugly fit around my calves, tightly bound and I can feel my thighs all wet with something hot and sticky that isn't cum or nectar--I'm wet inside my passage and it leaked out in the bed as I was cumming. Slowly I lean back and get a look down at my body. I'm black and blue across my hip, it must have wrapped around me some, and there beyond that my legs are beautiful in shining golden bands with silver inlay showing scenes of me and Boobsong having sex in different ways--holy fuck that's gorgeous game! Of course they have no fasteners or opening. The game makes them around me, and cuts me out again. I could try to laser these, but I'll probably find they're fireproof, and I couldn't bring myself to destroy such wonderful porn anyway. I feel so grateful happy soft submissive. I'll wear these till you take them off, hell yes.

The game keeps fucking Boobsong for a moment more, then puts my clit away and pulls me up with its tentacles and sets me on the bed in slave pose. Next move up to me, it says in tiny Knowledge: pricking in.

My ass screams out in pain and I click my eravahk, wait for Boobsong to poing up with her wings to help so she flops up like a movie demon, and zoom behind me, then just fall down again facefirst on the bed. Slave pose felt nice and right but I really really need this.

BLAST OFF PRINCESS'S ASS EMERGENCY! Very very fast be down on hands and knees across her legs and slightly touching nipples to her thighs where she isn't black and blue and move so fast there's sonic booms to get my hand down to my pussy getting lots of nectar oof but need to move fast here take it up and so slowly gently place it on your ass just letting it drip down to you not even touching to your skin just yet. Move my hand around and make a pretty swirly heart design from drops to say I love her. Hot that gets me lots of lust! Very slowly start to rub it in, hands around your thighs and then all up your cheeks with gently soothing strokes.

Take another handful now, don't have to be so fast this time, stop to let my nipples drag all up and down your thighs because I'm thrusting like you're fucking, very slowly look around to see the splints along your legs where I feel them with my thighs to say with really sincere honesty Princess I'm very very envious. Please I'm begging as your cocksleeve who only wants to please you by wearing pretty stuff please make me wear things like that soon.

Deep, soothed, happy breath. Having her exclaim over my bondage and just envy me never stops being the most incredible strange feeling, like her face across my breasts looking up sweetly while I'm raped so hard my ass bleeds, telling me my enjoying this just makes her really happy. It makes me so excited to be bound and yet feel power fill up my chest. Somehow I feel more submissive now that all the way through beating me, even when it knocked me out and I found that hot. Now I can relax and stop pretending I'm her goddess and not her plaything.

My head whips around painfully but survivable to see her face when I realize what I thought just now. Cocksleeve--fuck this. Cocksleeve am I a good goddess toy?

Squirmingly shake my hips some more, keep going yes I see that.

You're the very very very best, just the most amazing one. You are really stupid dumb sometimes, I can't say that aloud but you're saying think my thoughts for this. That's one. The rest is just I really like this game and having you play with me is the very best fun I can imagine.

Yes you are a sexy soft submissive girl, but you're very still my boss! Just feel that and be controlled. I'll be your cutesy cocksleeve toy anyway.

Hey your ass is almost back! Nectar isn't moving this one, where the game beat "dumb" in. It's really really stuck, I'm sorry, Princess, but I think you must identify too much for me to rub it out.

Sigh. Fine. I deserve that mark, yeah. I push into her mind and look through her eyes to see my ass beat up but much healed, cute hands working hard, and dumb with the shape of a paddle around it on my left cheek, high up.

No skirts for me anytime soon then I bet. Nectar will keep that right there, not even healing naturally, if the identification is strong enough, which the comforted humiliation I feel says yes to.

Just leave it and focus on the rest, pluck.

High, Fill thirty glasses (1/30), Servants who air so much water

Okay unless you mean drip on my thighs and think about how sexy fingerbanging myself would feel being that wet I don't know what glasses or with what we're filling here. Is this little sparkly toy too stupid to explain that to, game?

Knowledge: she's stupid to be asking. Just say my questions and be told I'm dumb to ask or have an answer.

Okay, alright, but I guess I'm really hungry so can you please make sure I don't get uppity?

Knowledge: it already has, I just haven't noticed yet.

Something going to feel weird when I get up for real, yeah. This kind of need to get talked down to and degraded is rare for me.

Like I just seem to want more.

Thirty glasses game? Where do I get them and what should I fill them with? I didn't see one--oh it was while I was knocked out, duh.

Taking the riddle literally...like what if the problem is I missed that it was made for the amount of smarts I actually have, and...wow okay that's getting inside my head apparently I totally just meant that and wasn't being compliant what's happening here.

Knowledge: thirty glasses of cocksleeve goo that comes out of me when I'm wet, since I had the goal. That's it. I wasn't supposed to be smart to understand this. Stupid Fairy, trying to be clever when she should just be wet.

That water flowing feeling, my heart knitting back together. How can this be doing that? Can you please make it stupid enough to pull me down more game and tell me how?

Knowledge: silly Fairy girl. Don't beat up yourself for just wanting not to have to feel like all your life's an IQ test, maybe that's the stupidest idea yet! There isn't very much to this. Sometimes I don't try so hard. That was part of who I am. I lost it in the bad stuff, now it's coming back pleasantly like the wetness that leaks out of me.

Oh. Okay. Um...no just okay then.

Cocksleeve check. Her not me, hehe--but check my cocksleeve, cocksleeve, how's my wet feel and taste? Three fingers up my hole to your palm. Eat all you get.

Slowly push apart your crack gently and so smoothly slide three fingers in there's really no resistance.

Girly breathy moan time. It just happens really, though I'd have done it for effect if not. Her fingers in my body feel so softly good and filling I can't help myself.

Feel up and down around...eat all I get here goes there's a lot--

Peek through her eyes. Big looping strings hang off her hand as she deftly twists it around to keep from spilling, and I feel as beautiful as the splints made me feel all over again. It doesn't hurt my ass, either, which means I'm done with the emergency fix. She can keep on rubbing nectar in though, it's soothing.

Worship? Filled up almost to tip top!? No, she's being so submissive I feel like a real goddess, even though I'm pooling almost literally into a blob of wet submission. This rules, and the thing you'd say in a show here is even if I'm not except I am.

I want to feel more stupid, it's really healing.

Yummy take it off my hand with long sexy blowjob tongue you can hear me lick and I'm thinking the would be wonderful licked off your clit or put on Sex's face for me to clean. She would really like that lots, remember how she liked that pussy soft hands gummi?

Okay the two of you need to go down on me together and trade off between clit and hole.

(This isn't like rimming me. My ass never has to be, um, an ass, so it gets to taste and kind of feel I'd like to think since this goo is just normal pussy goo, like a very simple pussy. Nectar rules, did I mention?)

Tasting notes.

Slippery stretchy nectar upgraded stringy stuff, long thick ropes to suck off which is fun. Kind of salty caramel with tiny bit of strawberry. Contrasts with Sugar Swirl Strawberry Explosion cum good taste together. Lubes up really nice. Even feel it on my tongue still!

"Make happy mistakes. Answering how to feel stupider. Try free thoughts."

Syrupy soft kind condescension drips off every word of the game's out-loud voice. I feel about four years old.

"Then tell me more," I blurt, the first thing that comes to mind. I can't have free thoughts, I'm just the toy here, so it must mean just letting them do whatever.

"Take a round with cocksleeve off and see if you have no choke."

Giggle, we already know where my gag reflex isn't...

"Wait, do you mean you can take my passage out and turn it into a cocksleeve like my clit comes off? Do it I want to see!"

Something swells inside my mouth and fills it up and then I'm spitting out a strange sweet soft thing that flops onto the bed beside my face. It's bright pink-red sex-toy outside, but the end looks like my hole--does this mean--catastrophe, my whole mouth is there! I put my hand up to my face and feel it smooth and flat where my lips should be. What's the mouth end look like?

Hands won't move. Not Boobsong.

Game this is hot--

Knowledge: if it made that rule, which I have for now and should have fun with now, permanent, I couldn't wind Sex's key or play with her.

Oh my god stupid Fairy. Thank you for saving me game. Can...I have some more? Also pluck.

Get off legs and come slinking up your side and lay down to see this cocksleeve thing. Pick it up...so soft..like heartstone not human...ends are real though. Really weird to see your hole right there! Turn the end to show you.

There my lips are, but I can't open them, just curl them and make kissy sounds and lick my lips sexily which looks so weird.

Bwaha kissy--dammit, kissing my own face with this by pushing my head to it must count as masturbation. Fine, pluck.

Slowly put your mouth against your face right here.

Why's it feel so different this way? Soft sweet puffy lips kiss my face with horny love, and I have to lick--yum, strawberry bwaha, I giggle, and stand her down. My body can't believe that's my mouth, so it thinks I both kissed someone else and got a kiss.

Cocksleeve back.

Oh. Um. Uh oh. Game, am I stuck like this now?

"Cocksleeve fun over yes."

Sparkles come around my face, the cocksleeve disappears from Boobsong's hand, and the feeling that my mouth's full comes back, drains away so fast the pressure pulls my cheeks in like sucking a cock real hard, and everything is back inside me.

I lick my lips again, feel my jaw work.

Pluck.

Lift head, slide back down to your thighs--

...pluck...

--get up facing backwards with my pussy wet right there between your ass cheeks and push my ass a little down on them not too hard so gentle. Looking at ballet splints, tracing every part with softly gentle fingers and showing you how envious they make me by how I touch you. Please oh please I want some!

I feel strong enough now to kick my heels up a little, do the girl hanging out in bed thing for a moment, not so much it gets in Boobsong's way but yay I can move. Can I third person, game, I want to see this.

My view pops out to be above Boobsong's shoulder and her hair gleams black to reflect--oh good, it took the paint away, blue is not my color but iron says to Fairy me lock you up so nice and strong--her hair reflects the box we're in. Her hands trace down my calves exploring all the finely carved gold around them, feel up my soft white calves and strong ankles that look so femme in these. I feel small and wet and big and strong to see this and Boobsong's arousal to do this. It makes me wonder why I thought the domme I showed to Sex exists, even as a play-act, yet here we come with sexy thoughts of owning her and Boobsong. I want to see her doll again, but I haven't got the idea yet.

Sex--sweet!--pops up like a blowup sex toy into being on the bed right beside me. I guess it's almost time. No key as yet, and I won't make her think a single thought until it's winding her.

I pop back in my head and loll my head to look at her on the bed right there, burgundy fun between her legs right by my face. She's nice to see though.

Pluck--huh, why can't she--oh. I blink third person and thumb my eravahk's stick to turn Boobsong off my legs, the pilot her around to my head and click arrange me on my back on your kneeling thighs and blink back.

Gently take your arms--helping? Not anymore hehe--roll you over where you are heavy ooof...aah Princess sorry oops! I didn't mean to let you go so fast! My hand just slipped oh no here's mistakes I'm so dreading now what if it's not hard enough what if it I get even worse--

Not even oof really. Ssh. I fidget myself the rest of the way into her lap how I want, pull her head down by the leash to where I can reach, and slap her face, one good whack.

Oof! Wow that hurt more than expecting! Masochism not so fun when you know you did wrong!

"Good, now don't be an even stupider cocksleeve and keep worrying. You know not to drop me. Pet my hair and play with it, soothe me."

Stroke your head with such gentleness...

Hey Dreams, I wish for a bowl of peeled grapes for her to feed me, but make them bright purple and artificial grape flavor instead of real.

Shining light appears over Boobsong's head--bwaha catch, cocksleeve!

Ahh hands go up to it look to see if I'm getting it right get both hand around it--there hah safely down.

Sex's key falls into my lap, right where my clit would be if it was on me now. Cute.

"Thank you, game," I squeak out like a little kid.

I kick my feet up to see my awesome footwear with that key I can't pick up but Boobsong can in the foreground--wait, my hands will work for this? I drop them back again, not ready to wind her yet--oh. Stupid Princess toy, I have to be able to pick up the key to get to the end of not having use of my hands for anything but what really matters!

It's weird, this could almost be back home, of course it'd be strawberries instead of weird grapes--watch my desire and feed me grapes, cocksleeve--but I've always been the weird rainbow colored freakish alien thing of the family, and the only other thing to change other than the wallpaper would be that my shoes would have openings and ankles that move. Maybe. Some of that stuff...anyway like, I know that all, and feel it's real, those aren't just fantasies or books I read, but it all feels so trampled down and far away. I don't know if that's good or bad.

Pick up grape, into mouth with fingers on your lips where it touches you--sucked! Hot...

I suck the grape and a lot of her fingers in, and hold on them to lick for a moment, before letting go.

Keeping her lust filled can be a two-sided job--or not. This is the kind of task I could mess with her to run down unavoidably without just boringly stopping her flirting.

Oh think so huh? Watch this I'll make you cum from this!

You go right ahead, serving-wench.

Want to know how I'll do it that sexily, desire for grape I say! Put the grape in my mouth and only just not swallow it. Place bowl beside me carefully, climb across your chest, head keep up with my tail under it (strong, tail, you can do it I know you can), squish my pussy down so I'm squeezing up your breasts in between my legs and getting nectar all over them you'll have to make me lick with cleaning tongue and slowly bend toward with lips apart just a little bit and eyes horny look what this does to me I feel so sexy now. Push my lips up against your and open them. Grape inside, Princess, come and get it please! Your tongue can reach, I know it can!

You, you, succubus! It's too hot to resist. I lift my head up and grab her hair and force my inhumanly long tongue into her mouth and--stop there--

Oh my--no you know what I don't candy swears right now I'm not even smart enough to use them right right now all that time I was lying there I forgot my tongue could reach! You stupid bimbo, Rainbow!

Fine well grape to get and things to do. I plunge my tongue in and force it down her soft embracing pussy of a throat tasting of thick hot nectar so dark and good and feel the grape and reach past it to curl my tongue around it and drag it up the smooth slippy nectar-gooey length of her weird sex-doll tongue and slurp it into my mouth, then without missing a beat grab her hips, smash them down to squish my breasts more and really get nectar everywhere, then start to lift her up without even stopping kissing.

Game, please put my clit on my mound so I can fuck Boobsong.

Knowledge: when Boobsong's right about to be penetrated, I'll have my clit where it needs to be. The game's reminding me who's controlling this by keeping it until then, and not giving it to me for any reason but Boobsong, until I get this through my head.

Why is that so wonderful. Can you rub it in somehow, without just torturing me about not being able to fuck Sex?

Knowledge: don't be finicky when I'm asking for harder squeezing. As my punishment, my nude lips are going to get thick like hers unless my clit's on, and feel so sensitive Boobsong has to constantly pleasure me. It'll end when I start acting like the dumb sweet slut I'm supposed to be.

"Then I..."

Gulp. It's right there and I'm so hungry for it but what will happen when I take the fruit? I hold my wants and desperate needs all there for the game to see them all like that will do anything and breathe in deep and huskily whisper, "I'm so horny to feel you holding me it makes me so wet but I'm just so scared of it because I need this stuff. Please," I gasp, and leave it hanging there.

Knowledge: the game sees my who soul at once. Everything I'm thinking of is part of its Keeping. I'll be getting all of it. Here is some encouragement to ask the way I did. My two biggest fears right now are being kept from the scene I've planned, and having it be so distracting with my lips like that I can't play with Sex right after this. I've already done the lips punishment now. I asked sweet and submissively for the need I have without describing it which is how I should express myself because I don't know what is best anyway so I can't help by describing it. Just be confident the game can feel me out entirely, no matter what I say. I can ask for the opposite and get my need, just ask submissively. The horny sex I have planned is wonderful, and the game will just encourage it by giving it a sexy twist. When I get my body ready to cum enough, the game will hold it there until I'm done inspecting her and let me cum when it decides I should. It won't keep back my orgasm until it harms me or makes me sad, just let me have some fun first, and feel deep game control of me. It sees I'm going to say it next, and won't keep back this scene or anything, just give me what I need so bad, so I should ask with all my heart for this.

I breathe in and make a horny sound that turns into the words "Oh game puhhleaaase I need your hardest fuck! Make me feel inside of me what this really means!"

Knowledge: here is what is happening, my new life arranged for me, to the last peaceful ending that I'm desperate for. First we get inside of me that I am Sex's mommy now. She is already deep in love with me, before I woke that first time, there's nothing to stop or change that now. She is really just as able to just be a toy I play with every now and then, and she will be a faithfully stupid one, so there's really no good reason to be winding her unless I feel like playing Sex the game and for my daily wakeup. No it doesn't matter that she'll count the times she wakes me without another winding. She doesn't need to be out or see her friends much, and her family doesn't like her (which is part of how she's frozen), so I'm taking this next moment to see she's just a sex doll and not some huge big project. Sex is not the smart kid I think she is. She likes to read and study but isn't a big scholar, just a nerdy slut who'd really just be happier having sex and talking about things like swimwear (she has a swimsuit fetish like yowzers, that was why the jumpsuit, closest she could dare to wearing a bikini on her bottom and nothing on her top). We're taking her back to live at Heart Home. Camp will be there to visit, but Heart Home is our home now, just like in our dreams when we were kids. Our life will be simple. Wake up, Sex helping us get playing, make her stay or unwind her like I imagine, game will choose if I don't choose or sometimes just to fuck me, take me out or keep me in, the game will make decisions or help me with simple options. It will take me to the lake camp when Mama doesn't call for me and I want to be there. Sex will come and always be there to wake us back up so I can idolize to sleep every time. Beds are just for sex now. I'll have a nice deep closet with lots of sexy fun things, endless toys for playing sexy games with, and every dozen days my loved ones will be there or I'll see them where they live. The magic of this life of easy rest forever will be the last four monoliths, I don't need to keep looking, they will come to me now. Finally it's finished. Life's done, play starts. Go take Boobsong.

Tears run down my face and I sniffling-sob pathetically, great wracking shudders. of I don't even know. "HEART HOME IS THE ONLY PLACE I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET ALL THESE YEARS," I wail, clutching Boobsong's hips still, her face an inch from mine, looking so help Princess sweetly--

Creaking metal hinges grind and cracks appear around us at the box's every corner, it's walls fall back and ceiling departs to hyperspace, and in front behind my eyes on Boobsong's face still, is the dolphin-maid statue over the door of Heart Home's bedroom.

Tears and tears and tears, just holding her, but eventually, still horny for my wicked plan, I lift Boobsong's hips--Dreams I wish for a nice pillow so I can do other stuff with her tail.

Tail moved out by tingly sparkly stuff and comes a rainbow-splash pillow under Princess head. So pretty around her rainbow-streaks hair and crown!

Softly feathers in silk surround my head--sniff--is that orange candy? Creamsicle? Omifuck Dreams did you give me a pillow made of Pleiades' down!? I guess she really loves her mommies but I don't remember Walt being much of a Sadist! Pluck!

Worshipfully lower myself and pray like a little kid saying grace with my hands folded Goddess thank you for the meal you give to me now and while my head's down feel the pillow with my folded hands beside your head.

My face trembles with the inexpressibility of the warm flood that pours through my heart and overflows and feels like it floods my whole body...and also my worship is overflowing--augh holy strawberry soda and Mentos EEP control it as best I can give some intention um fun getting to know Sex and some that'll be obviously for me to show me and Boobsong a good time nothing permanent or even long-lasting on either except let's throw Sex a few of doozies the Dreams will have to help shape to be good things they're so hardcore and um give me a comfort one aaAAA "AAAAAAAAAAAH!!"

It's like my skin becomes a cock that's cumming, a hot juicy throbbing explosion of released pressure over every part of me, and wave after wave of candy of every shape and size and kind explode into being out of it and half-bury us (all wrapped, though it's fun doing this and intending no wrappers, because you can definitely absorb Sugarfeast candy the same ways as drugs) as I gasp and pant with each wave. It's not quite as mindbreaking as my orgasms, but it sure has the joy and relief and sexiness of cumming, and the way a mild orgasm can make you horny for more, and the memory it brings back, I...first I'm so tired, and then I can't get back to work fast enough?

Sugarfeast, my holy day, centered around this candy of course, and the way it would start was to go before a temple full of as many worshippers would come (and cum) and have them worship me so I overflowed like this and made candy to bring everywhere. Boobsong's worship is worth hundreds of times more than most people's for this because she means so much to me but I still really care about anyone who for some reason worships me as a goddess and a temple with thousands in it gave me a hell of a ride and I'm horny to go again, feel like I haven't been myself in so long...anyway how sad would it be if Santa Claus retired? I can hardly do less.

Need to see if she's around or what. If I'm still doing Sugarfeast we should get the band back together. I wonder how Cherry is, for that matter. I could use some fireworks, and she's the one to call for that...

MEMORY! The candy is my star-creation thing! Stars make stuff. Weird stuff, like semiphysical machines made of ontological-engineering programming code (my kid brother), constructs combining light and anti-light without shining the anti-light it making him insane (dad--his problems really didn't come from his anti-light thing), mathbreak stuff like the worldgate that could take me and the other operatives between the Strawberry Empire and Earth or a box of heartstone that'd locally turn off thermodynamics (Uncle Dagon), Auntie Lucifer...um...right she's like your cutely weird aunt who keeps a copy of The Anarchist's Cookbook on her coffee table, she evens the playing field when somebody decides Uncle Dagon is more of a person than Sex because he's a giant Lovecraftian tome and she's (if the game is right and it'd get spiked like whoah if not) a Little Golden Book, or even that there's any calculus of how much of a person anybody is at all (but watch out if you talk to her about Gnosticism, she's pretty mad about some of the overwrites that happened in the last--thing not thinking about that). She's kind of adopted me because she thinks it's great and properly rebellious that my response to what happened with dad is just completely blowing off normal star development forever. The shadow puppet game is our way of celebrating that and it's very sweet of her because I'm being terribly impolite in it.

Fizzfrozen toffee stretchers Sex is going to feel so hot when I take her to meet Uncle Dagon and he begs to have a look--OOH I just thought up the most evil candy watch where this goes and remember it handmaiden oh and let's give it a nice mild secondary effect so she doesn't realize what the real thing is until it's happening. Blurt.

I make it manifest on top of my head so she'll see it before it falls and remember with the perfect eidetic memory of hers that makes her such a treat when building with Legos.

Candy falls off your head and down to the left of you... [camera click] Muahahah super evil grin she'll be surprised by that I just hope it doesn't scare her before she realizes it feels good!

All of my family's stuff takes eons of study to get right--it's skills that we learn, not inherent ability, it's just that stars naturally obsess themselves with something like that because it's an extension of our...I guess you'd say nesting instinct, but I'm way too young to do any of that, just like I could barely even see Sex's key even though I created it with my abstraction-happy stellar consciousness--something about me being human, which is a scarily impossible thing that somehow happened anyway, turned my stellar creativity into the candy thing. They express my id instead of my ego, which...I mean what that means should be obvious.

What I can't remember is how they never come out cruel or just misshapen. The Dreams or my game, I have to have help somehow--okay that's the weepiness of striking a nerve but it has to be just me wanting it to be true.

The Dreams show me on of the crystal-cave-style mirror rocks that're all over Heart Home to stroke my vanity , a sperm, a melted Google logo in a fancy dessert cup...the cum thing's quite accurate, the candies "impregnate" you (look, if you don't things to get weird right away in a very sexual and personal way definitely find another goddess) with half of a wish that binds to something in you that's compatible and goes out to the Dreams, which fulfill them with love. I can control how hardcore the wish in the candy is, but it can also be just as affected by what it binds to, so my intention to e.g. give Sex a key she has to stick in and get wound some number of times a day on pain of statufication can turn into what she actually got.

I'd still like to think the fact that the thing I most want is to show people a sexy good time and make them like me for it and that I conceive the candies in love saves the Dreams a lot of spiking the exact wish...but my stellar creation thing is basically to do with abstraction and description and stuff. I can do stuff like astrally project to an idea and look around it like a place if I want.

Which is how I'm going to actually violate Sex's past. Much more interesting than taking her room apart, and Boobsong can arrange for her to watch. Game I need to go visit why Sex is frozen soon.

Top, Visit the lesion of harpies Sex is cold from, Eleven licks of candybar

Sniffle...game that's the saddest pun you've ever made. What's with that prize? Is it that you'll come up with something powerful enough to keep her to only eleven licks of my candybar?

Knowledge: cleverness isn't the only way to read these things.

Oh. Because all these riddles from the game and our seed-ghost are a little like Sex's commercial breaks, to remind me what I am constantly. I'll misunderstand unless I read as stupidly as possible. She has a still-open wound made of screaming ghost-women freezing her heart and she'll lick my candybar in worship eleven times as a ritual to wake me each morning and then give me Boobsong when I can't even move yet which will be so very peaceful.

Okay you'd better give me cuffs or something and a lot of handholding for that game because if you gave her to the last heir of the extremely matriarchal Strawberry Dynasty this is delicate.

Knowledge: it has some rope for me when the time comes.

Alright nothing to tell you you can do stuff with one hand tied behind your back like it happening literally, I guess.

Alirght enough I'm so distractible today with all this memory stuff.

Handmaiden hears that and says Princess is ready to hear her orders results. Raise back up and smell my hands. Yes that's my daughter's scent! There's a note right here!? How'd this get this way?

Pluck!!!

Take my hands out of their praying form and reach down and take the note. It's attached but I can read from here.

Here's something from out of our fantasies to help yours. It sure was Sorcerer's Apprentice Mode that time! Hope you enjoy my scent as much as Walt. Pleiades

Oh my fizzfrozen astronaut ice cream I forgot I showed Walt when that showed up in the Jargon File. I am such a huge nerd.

Fine a little distraction. Why does something feel like weepy dry cracked lakebed inside me when I think about that?

No it's more like sadly unused for decades room of a house.

An achingly beautiful scene of Omnibot 2000 sitting on a laser grid holding an NES controller in its gripper like Boobsong would hold out a candy on her palms for me with neon mountains on the horizon under a glowy vector-display starscape...okay yes that's how I feel about eighties stuff, except--OUCH! That PINCHED! Trying to think in the direction I tried was like catching my hand in hinge-gap of a closing door.

The Dreams are talking around the way I can't go, but all tried to do was remember--oooh. But I know Walt insisted on producing our cartoon, and how neon I insisted it should be, and how I resisted--ouch there it is again!! RRR! There's a missing piece, but every time I try to look it gets all weird, I catch a glimpse of this messed up version of my little-kid self with a top-ponytail instead of curls and missing my rainbow streaks and Boobsong's a unicorn instead of a ram-horned batpegasus and then OUCH okay brain I'm stopping jeez.

Then I start weeping because my friends are gone.

Not from my life they haven't abandoned me. From me. From my head. The memory is locked out or broken or something. That's a big piece to have missing. All seven Color Kids--they weren't called the Color Kids--RRRRRRRRRRR what were they we had a name--the Rainbow Club--no that's my fanclub I didn't pick that name it made me want to crawl under tables and hide--my religion is called the Sugarfeast Cult--I just can't remember them, what's wrong with me!? We know I'm a narcissist, just look at my bedroom here that's more mirror than statues or doorway, but I still love my friends and lovers a lot--oh my sticky caramel sundaes they're my polycule and the only ones I can remember are Santa and Cherry and Mama!

We weren't very closely bound because all of us are heartformers to Hollow Heart submissive su'khora so we connected over the understanding that our hearts belonged to someone else but we still cared very deeply about each other--it was really important to us all to have people in our lives who could understand our saying sorry but you don't see me without my heartchild or being distractedly schmoopy with them constantly (Boobsong's very literal about it but capturing your heart is definitely a basic thing su'khora generally do). I don't even remember Santa's face except that her beard is fake (she could be genderfluid for all I can remember) as a silly way to protect herself from the kind of attention I get when Boobsong's handmaiden disguise is off us! Who are even the rest of us there's more than just four! One for each color of the Rainbow that part's right isn't it? ROY G BIV Cherry the Revelry Bard is red, orange orange PIKA PIKA except she had Eevee not Pikachu EISELA was orange what was her day did she have a day yes she did we blew the wheel of the year away with new stuff based on the Strawberry cult but evolved from that it was my project to save Earth from dad before he got out of that thing but what was the name of Eisela's day nothing it's gone I'm so terrible...or was Eisela yellow no she was orange I'm sure. Yellow I can't remember her except it's a her that's sure I'm a gold-star lesbian except liking cock so much you'd wonder about me and we were all sex-partners. Green is Mama, the Openveil Witch, that's nice to remember. Blue, another empty spot DAMMIT I hate myself so much right now fine keep moving indigo indigo indigo yeah she's also gone stupid gone friends how about Violet that should be Boobsong right nope Boobsong is purple the impossible color stars can't see because it's a human qualia and not a wavelength of light which I think is so kinkily wonderful to see purple doesn't feel like anything else it's electric and tastes like candy and I feel like such an awesome freak perceiving it violet there's a Violet literally her name was that--no that's a book I wrote--WHOSE PROTAGONIST WAS A MIXTURE OF BOOBSONG AND MY REAL FRIEND! The heartformers of our group were all dommes somehow except violet and her massive artificial girl kink! What was her day--

The consumerist holidays overwrote us after--after--but there's only four of them that's why the missing friends are gone that part of my memory is stomped out even worse than the rest--wait a minute what color's this other one Cheryl that's another fic but I think based on a real person um...her eyes were blue the world's only blonde Latina was her joke about it that's right HI BLUE! Her heartchild's dominant too he had like this Freud thing complete with cigars...I remember her having kind of Fairy-ish response to nectar I think she's a Fairy too and Viktor her heartchild became her Keeper like my game is to me when his nectar brought the genes out as hard as Boobsong's did to me SPIKE YOU MEMORY PROBLEMS I FOUND MY FRIEND AGAIN! Her day was...in my story she was a muse for kinky stuff but in this slutty Gertrude Stein kind of way...did it resurface as National Novel Writing Month? Something like that. Close but no cigar ehehe FATHERS DAY AND MOTHERS DAY ARE CONSUMERIST HOLIDAYS the changes weren't one to one but if you're going to find daddy stuff anywhere it...won't be her. Argh. What else THANKSGIVING Cheryl focused on FOUND FAMILY! Her day was to celebrate with the people important to you WHOEVER THEY WERE! You went home for HEARTWARMING you can see it in the overwrites every Christmas carol is about going home for the holidays and every Thanksgiving meme is about awkward silences over dinner but you never see stuff about drama on Christmas day even though giving presents is like the worst emotional minefield if your family ties are strained! The name what was it called RIGHT everyone called it Turkey Day after because they could probably remember a bit it was called Turn-Key Day! No, wait, that doesn't...it's close enough, that's why my brain and the overwriting went there. Latch Key Day, for all the latch-key kids of the world. Cheryl got left alone so much her seed-ghost's version of child protective services manifested one day in a tweed jacket lighting his cigar and her holiday was about home when there wasn't one. You'd have a huge meal to give the finger to all the times you didn't get supper and of course that made feeding people a thing to her too.

She cared about kink education and community a lot because often your polycule or dungeon would be that found family, but it wasn't just for queer people.

I'm getting so horny with Boobsong sitting on me like this but this is important and it's kind of fun leaving you sitting there with your lust draining out drip by drip oh so very slow because you're not moving but you'll be a doll soon anyway tick tick tick muaha!

Sit up and put my hands on my thighs like a slave pose because that's my no orders pose but I'm feeling it drip away super slowly and it's making me wet with each passing second to feel myself dripping down to cum spurting out of your clit inside me and I have to just sit there and take it I can't even squish down to say more of this I just have to be a squishy hole you rub along your clit to cum that looks very pretty like a handmaiden made of silver and filled with sexy goo to squeeze out as lube.

Holy fuck I'm wet it's leaking all over your big soft and comfy breasts! If I keep on like this you'll be covered entirely head to tip and down your legs--I guess I'll cover your tip either way hehe--but you're going to please fuck me soon, right?

Yes, when you're ready to get reaaaally close to finishing me and then stop so I have to stroke myself off with you like the cocksleeve you are--we still need that term--

Knowledge: I'm very close to something important that will make my scene better. I should keep remembering.

Weird, I thought I was off in lala land more than usual. Okay um Eisela had mother's day! Her su'khora Pokemon--she had like centuplets or something insane like that--were kids to her and she was very protective of them. Pokemon was big when she was a kid and she fell in love with the creatures and hated the idea of their fighting so her gotta catch 'em all was the idea of rescuing Pokemon from the battle circuit. Then she found out there's such a thing as Valkyr and you can be born to fight, so, enh, Rl'yeh Sade's not the only Dream that'll fuck your head sometimes. Mother's day...I think her Pokemon made it up to celebrate their mommy and it got out before she could die of how I felt about there being a Rainbow club or something like that. Boobsong calls me Mommy when she's being extra cute or to snap me out of my daymares--that was what we called PTSD flashbacks back home--okay Red check Orange check Yellow?

I bet she's hiding there in my fiction too! It's a mess as much as the rest of my head, but...um...it's weird to me that orange and yellow were different, did she not exist? I don't have her holiday I think. Let's come back.

Green is Mama. There's another Green, too, but not part of our polycule. I remember Mama pretty well. Boobsqueeze, she called me, because of my wandering hands (usually to myself, unless Boobsong's in reach). Her day was Openveil, the spooky night where Sade would walk the Earth (or Strawberry World) and the next day the magic they trailed after them would let everyone's ancestors and loved ones come manifest physically which was hard to do from outside Earth and the Strawberry World.

Blue, hi Cheryl.

Indigo. Hang on. It bugs me that blue and indigo, and yellow and orange, are separate. I'm a girl (sexism schmexism, it's just you get to read fashion magazines if you're a girl), and a princess--from a matriarchal empire no less--and star. Making color more simple than average shouldn't be a me-thing, but...I don't think there are yellow or indigo? How does that feel OUCH MY HEAD OKAY!

We did group color differently back home, gave five major shades octaves or something like that, but that isn't the problem here, this was based on the Earthling rainbow like the bands in my irises, and the fact that there were eight of us (my name already being Rainbow and that being a perfect color--stars name colors as frequency bands, which is how you get Hypergamma to Radio in English--for Sugarfeast). It's cool remembering exactly what my name means, but...

Okay now the memory of a weird creepy spiked up dream I had about Walt never heartforming so not living to even see Disneyland built but somehow there was still a Starlight Princess except Disney (the company, not Walt) freaked out when I hit puberty and the game thing happened and our adventures in the Dreams changed accordingly and tried to get out of their contract by just not producing the next episode and my game made me throw the court case until the very last moment then saved us and got it so Disney had to basically buy us anything we wanted to get it made or have to produce the show themselves which (in the dream there was no Disney After Dark, they had this obsession with not making porn like to a ridiculous degree) so to make them give in and make it after all I said there was no other western animation studio that could handle it and they had to import all of Gainax to the US where it wouldn't be constrained by censorship laws (in the dream instead of just being Sadish imports tentacle porn was invented there as a way to get around it being illegal in Japan to draw cocks or anything else good, which is how I know I made the dream up that's exactly the kind of sermon I would preach about censorship), except instead of caving they actually did it--

Oh sweet swirly suddenly deorbiting Jolly Ranchers when everything...yeah...the show got split in half at volume fifteen. What was the rewrite will it bite--no that was just the door blocking my lovers out, the other show was even about lesbians according to everyone--I'd be Sailor Sun (if there was one of those? It's all glitched in my head) of course because I'm the star har har, then we can match up the "color kids" it was surprising though...Cherry became Sailor Mars because of the nationalism-vs-unity thing of Revelry (the name's a pun, her basic question: do you wanna party or get called to war?)...Cheryl was Sailor Venus because if you study your astrology Venus is actually more like the Dreamers' name it's stolen from, relationships and thoughtfulness as much as beauty...Mama, death and bondage, Sailor Saturn...Eisela Sailor Moon because the Moon rules Cancer which is the mothering sign--why'd the rewrite change the protagonist--OH. Dammit. The Moon is also the planet of emotion and arbitrary desires, and we all know who that's going to be. So then...

Game I think I'm too dumb for this.

No wait the Dream is a metaphor we imported Gainax to do what Disney couldn't in that world what would that mean make adult Starlight Princess of course but...it's pointing me at something in the media landscape and--Evangelion?

It pounds with something, though that could just be having seen the last episode...more detail of the dream surfaces, they didn't make Evangelion because we kept them too busy with Starlight Princess, making it cost millions of dollars an episode to keep squeezing Disney, anime was forever different, the whole giant robot genre didn't get the deconstruction that made Gurren Lagann's reconstruction possible Evangelion exists only AFTER because Anno heartformed and wasn't depressed enough to invent the concept! Did he make something else where is this taking me cartoon are important being as I AM one...Boobsong, it would have to do with her--hentai? Huh?

I thought she was hentai for a while in the bad stuff. It messed us up subtly somehow. Is that still affecting me? I think the dream was my subconscious trying to get it through to me that we're Disney-style--I mean there's a thing. I'm a literal Disney Princess and Boobsong is my talking thing-that-doesn't-talk-companion--did the training thing take away her voice to get me in the proper mood, or because she's not supposed to talk? It feels weird either way, like I can't find what's supposed to be. Isht Visht has lots to say but most of our kids are nonverbal (including Pleiades, though she can write because of her drawing skills) or very quiet and shy, and you'd be surprised how squirmy Boobsong gets in front of people I could make her perform for this scene somehow but this feels like a private time just getting home like this...I grin remembering a picture of her I have just standing there naked smiling a totally real smile but her hands are clenched with the emotion of getting photographed like that and knowing all our fans will see.


It was so hot to be up on display! Remember how you made me give you that sexy kiss right as they took the next one? And the next one after that you were inside of me so fast they didn't expect it? You said it would explicit and they didn't know you well! You were thinking of all of that and you had me standing there knowing I would run out of lust like that and my pussy was soaking wet and they had this big camera that was super loud click-whirr with the film they didn't have digital yet so it made this big whirr not just a snap and this very long line of people with books I was going to have to kiss (the books not the people)--

That was my eighteenth! I still can't believe we got anyone to understand that su'khora are the same age as their heartformers the moment they implant so you were technically legal too even though I implanted a few months after I was born!

Yeah because six months is such a big difference in whether I'm ready to photograph.

You're being superSade. Remember Earth has to use such clumsy heuristics because it doesn't have the Dreams to sort this out, and imagine how somebody who implanted around puberty like most heartformers would feel thinking their heartchild was five instead constructed at the same age they were, especially to hear about seed-ghosts adjusting development to keep the right maturity gap in the relationship (yes, viewers, that can go either way like with Cheryl, stop just imagining the most horrible thing you can).

Ugh, it's going to be hell tightening up the introspection on this without cutting out anything necessary. Can I even? I hope our viewers like my voice! I guess we can do like a Ghost in the Shell Philosophy Montage. Hope they're not too bored.

Well I guess here we go still making Starlight Princess too, because apparently thinking about you squirming for that camera has me all horny to get on TV again that I slipped right into fourth-wall notes for when we make this into an episode--spikes, how can we stop if there's still monoliths!? Alright well then mark this as a fourth-wall break then head up and smile and wave for the audience, dolly!

Look where I think the camera will be over your right shoulder and smile a big warm smile and put my tail up so you can see it and wave so I bounce my boobs HI FANS! Ready to watch me fuck?

HAH! Remember how we made the cameras jump for us while I was fingerbanging you to get nectar to put in the ink for the books--BOOKS! DUH with all this dialogue and memory and introspection and stuff and so little action (NOT THAT I MIND RIDING MY STATUE KINK SO HARD DREAMS) claiming Sex and getting here should be a novella! She'll be on the show and you can all see how hot she is soon enough. Sex I mean. Sex is generally on our show, heh.

It's still going to be hell to tighten up enough. Maybe we can get Cheryl's help.

Oh hell yes I even have the title already. Starlight Princess: Having Sex bwaha.

This amnesia thing seems to be making me do a kind of new-viewer introduction thing which scary since right now feel like the new viewer in my own life, but let's go with it. Boobsong's eidetic memory means she can tell me every word I ever think if I ask for it so we don't so much take notes on our life for the show as have her rattle off exactly what happened and draw or just transcode to QuickTime or whatever her viewpoint and tail it into the studio's fileserver (I have extremely nerdy kinks and seed-ghosts are thorough) and then turn that into a script that Disney can produce into an episode and air it on Saturday morning (when we were kids), the Disney Afternoon (when we were tweens) or Disney After Dark (nowadays). Telling you all that isn't too narcissistic because it explains that the just like our show the Dreams can be childlike for grownups like we became, but they can also just do kid stuff like soda lakes and candy fairs, and you have to be mature enough to explore them before the sexy parts even exist for you (this occasionally makes for some very confused grownups who thought sitting on your ass past your world's age of consent was the only thing you needed to be responsible sexually).

We also do novels, books of short stories, comics, games, whatever will fit the content best.

Or we did. I remember what happened after but if I think about that my heart will die in my chest and I'll crumble to dust. To survive I have to believe the only reason this is a book is because it wouldn't make a good episode which is probably why I can't tell where this is relative to after in my life.

Trying to catch Sex might make a good little single-serving dating sim. She's such a delightful pushover, but maybe if you're not me guessing her buttons is harder. I feel a bit like the Dreams just gave me somebody the right shape so when I tripped and fell on them I'd magically drag across their clit to exactly make them cum, so that might make the challenge like how well do you know the Starlight Princess? See if you can bag Sex like she did! I know that's so objectifying but watch her like it.

If our viewers are here, microsermon time! I'm a goddess what do you expect of me. This one's simple. If you're at all narcissistic like I am, try some nice loving objectification ASAP (not the mean cold kind, that's a completely different kink). Worship is great and so necessary but throw yourself in the path of some humiliation instead, get made to feel like a sexy toy a bit. Trust me on this. I will not elaborate.

Ooh maybe this book can be the reward for beating it the dating sim. That'd give the readers some vested interest to help them slog through all the introspection.

It's fun making dating sims and role-playing out all the possible options and stuff. You can learn a lot about your relationship by mapping it out like that, if you can remember your role-play is being forced to include things you would never never never ever actually say or do.

Could fake people out real bad in the endgame, make it seem like the punishment I got that feels like it saved my life right now and still has me hungry for...something like how can you possibly take care of me harder than asking for your hardest fuck and obviously getting it game anyway like make them think it's the bad end so they go reload and try to fix the key thing only to have my game make this happen some other way and teach the surrender lesson even in the metafiction because there's no way to get out of the punishment scene and the trust lesson because it should be obvious if my game is doing that it's not any kind of Bad End...hmm...yeah like really make it seem like the end and the actual solution is to somehow go yeah right that's not a Bad End and make the game go on past me lying there waiting to get better enough to lick Boobsong...wow that heals my heart to start thinking this way again hello unfreezing soft stuff please be part of me you're very necessary.

Okay all this is fine and I feel much better now just assuming our fans are watching this but like...is that the thing to make my scene better? It was in the back of my head anyway, like it always is.

A can of Ready-Whip being sprayed onto something...ready to whip? Hum. I wasn't really in the mood for Color Crack though I suppose I could just make it be tentacles? Like not no but not yes either--

The Dreams show me the approach to the flying field in Stamford, right before your drive into the park. Almost ready to fly...like the way of selling model airplanes, ARF, if this a dog pun--

Now it's my (former, he'll be nosing around the Beautiful Forest someplace now no doubt) Guinea Pig Zelda in his cage. Pet in cage alright we know who that is here actually I'm going to make that lesson stick game I will eep!

I feel sexy warm stuff and my heart melts some more seeing myself bent by that punishment like I was supposed to be, back into shape some, but how do these visions even connect to each other?

Now my RC flight instructor and his Jeep Cherokee. Teaching me to be a pet maybe? Which is the current work in progress? For which I'd better be ready seeing as it's happening to me (see! Learning! This is happening to me, I'm not doing it, I having very fun being played with but it doesn't mean I'm in charge of this!).

More soft sexy wet melting heart pulling me together as I try to at least give the right answers now though I do have every intention of acting on them when I even have any agency (see!) okay wow one warming heart two that punishment really got to me eeeep but that so very good contained-feeling eep.

Now a vibe of being at the Stamford RC club's Christmas party, which is unsexy because the club was a bunch of old guys except for a few of us and me and my brothers the teenage mascots but it's a happy memory, they were really nice to us and mentored us half to death so that I'm now a font of RC engineering tricks that make me like building planes much more than most people who pay lots of money for inferior-quality (the new foam planes are pretty cool but foam flies like a rubber duck and balsa flies like a real airplane) Almost Ready To Fly ones. Um...

I mean that's a little unfair. I had a tiny foam plane with an absolutely killer stabilization program that more than made up for its--mechanical limitations--

Everything falls into place and I gorge on Boobsong's pussy spread out smelling so achingly wonderful and her patiently waiting boobs heaving gently with the breath she breathes solely to look and sound hot, then tear my eyes away for a moment to check out Sex sitting really epically exactly where I left her. Burgundy's really growing on me, as a color.

Okay game here's the deal. Somewhere in Rl'yeh Sade there will be a club for people with dolls like Boobsong and Sex who have the kind of intentional limitations they do, and it'll be a place with dungeons set up and lounges and all such things to play social fun with your dolls and take them on doll-dates you couldn't do anywhere else and I don't even know that's the point because just like that RC club we're going to go there and learn all the little tricks and cool stuff you can do that's not in the manuals and you can't learn from just doing it and doesn't come up until you've gotten into enough situations like how to recognize a rich or lean idle without landing and listening close up and we'll show off to them just like half the RC hobby is showing the other fliers the cool plane you built and asking all about theirs and flying hard to look like a badass in front of everyone while you appreciate their doing but most of all. The really important thing, I think, is at the end of each night or decan or whatever, is there a big dance with everyone that's set up on a clock that's a big fancy mechanical clock wound by the dolls who get picked out for the honor at the start of the evening and it runs long enough and is precise enough that if you have a doll with predictable runtime or can hack it somehow, you can dance in the dance and have fun with their statued moments with like Boobsong and lust or Sex's commercial breaks until the very last beat of the very last song when all the dolls run down at the same time and the dommes (-mes because it's a lesbian club, game gets picky about me hanging out with masc people, it's made my friends eat nonpermanent genderswap candy to hang out with me before, so for a sex club duh) can hang out with like a winding-down (heh) social hour and appreciate the statue garden and do the checking out each other's airplanes thing and it's in a place that honors the normal various free-use/no-use marks to give the statues fun. Oh and the final dance is a medieval-style one with specified steps over the whole crowd so that when it ends the statue garden has a cool shape and maybe if there's someone obsessed enough to come up with this over and over again it's built around the participants so every doll gets a part to play that's essential and honors who they are and what they look like and how their "clockwork" works and the whole event is called the Last Dance and the place this all happens is...The Dollhouse, right?

No, because I remember going there at one point and it's something else and if you want to see someone get that Rl'yeh Sade look try mentioning the Amber Sky to them. I'll be needing to take Boobsong one of these days (I don't think they'll let Sex in, though my evil candy might change that) but it's not what we're talking about here.

This place I'm thinking up is called the Mechanical Heart and if it doesn't exist already which is inconceivable I mean this is Rl'yeh Sade come on but if somehow this has somehow failed to exist until now game I need to start founding it as soon as you have me squared away with Sex and settling in here, and if not I'm taking my dolls there yes I'm being demanding I'm choosing to play that way with Boobsong and you can make us leave Sex home if you want I guess but against my objections she is a toy I want to use in my scene that will take place on that dance floor and everywhere else in that place.

Anyway there's no way Andrea and Violet haven't beat me to this so it must exist HEY I GOT HER HEARTCHILD'S NAME! They freak people out because Andrea looks--okay average would be doing an injustice to her but normal except for the labcoat I swear is a part of her like Boobsong's wings while Violet looks and acts as synthetic as Boobsong but it's because her big kink is Andrea doing like a reverse Data journey to her making her as sexbot as possible (I'm not trying to scare you off su'khora with that and Boobsong, readers, most of Isla Virgo is full of heartformer/heartchild couples that except for often not being obsessed with monogamy look and act like they stepped out of one of your great aunt's "Inspirational Romance" novels).

Top, Make a stop at the flying field, big size breasty fun

Oooh, I haven't had an expansion runaway in a while, those always make me feel--OH.

Fffffhhhhuck. It comes out as a horny breath into Boobsong's pussy and midriff.

I'd count as a doll for that place. If they don't make me idolize at the end of the dance, my game sure will! I bet I end up winding the clock alongside Boobsong and Sex who I was going to volunteer of course.

No it definitely will because that's the reward, I can probably still expand from overfilling while statued or the game can arrange that and it'll stop me with my hands on my boobs in the way that sets off my lactation superpower right there on the dance floor. It can't keep Boobsong from worshipping me but it can mind-control me to dump all my worship like I think I can and just keep doing that until I idolize too much to control that part.

Gulp. Why is that so horny-wet. Not the breasty fun that's easy enough and I mean I guess obviously I have a huge statue kink and I'm apparently a pretty submissive girl even if I do get weird about sentient dominants (the game's incredible, but it's intentionally just a machine) but like I want them to think I'm cute and condescend to me but how can--

Knowledge: I just have to trust myself not to give up my hold on my powerful princess side as my cutesy soft childlike sub comes out.

It's not me I'm worried about though I am kind of confused by how I keep feeling here! I can't understand this like are you going to get me into some kind of chain of command thing with them and me and Boobsong and Sex, did you find a club that works that way? I know that's what we have really, I can see you chafe against the limits that make me able to pretend it's not like that, maybe it's time to admit that's how this works, is that what you're telling me? It must be that, I bet I'm the stupidest sub alive again--

Knowledge: I am not in a chain of command with the game and Boobsong, or Sex even. They're my toys, and my game administers everything in my life to make sure I don't have to be anything but domme to them. I am just a kid as my species goes, but there's another human-mature side to me and to be balanced and exist as myself without destroying one side of me I need to somehow feel held like a child and able to be an adult with these sexy games. The game does my parent's job, since I don't have one who'd be capable of doing it--not even my star-father can, now. This is my tricky part: my human side thinks I'm a grownup, and it's right in the kinds of ways that it thinks that about. I can play this with Sex and Boobsong, which a human kid sure couldn't! My star self is a baby so young it's an embryo, and if my game doesn't hold me my human self will stomp it to pieces. I'm not very responsible, have poor perspective and have lots of times I just want to be that kid, but that's my humanity. Humans are like that to their ancient years, usually. What it's holding me for is to make me crawl when I feel like running is my responsibility--it's not, not if I want to crawl, which I always do, since my real soul is the light wrapped up inside of me, not human, human-shaped, because of the shell I'm in. That gives me both the maturity to have slaves like Sex and Boobsong, the want to use them sexually (that's also my human side), and the responsibility to take care of my stellar self who is a little kid by not making her act like a grownup if possibly able to be a kid instead. Boobsong made herself into a children's book to make that easy for me. Sex is able to just be toy, and not need much keeping. There's a reason those are the rules of engagement for my relationships. Maybe I could do having slaves of the normal kind, but these I play with like children's toys are the kind I need to be okay.

Knowledge: If I want to keep hoping that someday my game will take hold of me to make me a toy who gave up agency as totally as Boobsong, it will say what I said to Sex before: the point of this is to have everything I am in this. It's making room for my starchild side by taking care of me like the parent I need, and keeping the adults in the room from hurting me is a big part of any parent's job, and usually I am the adult in the room it's talking about, but it will do the same thing to the friends at the Mechanical Heart who know me there. My human mom came to the flying field until I could drive us there, and the guys at the field respected me as an RC pilot, quite impressedly sometimes I'll remember, but they didn't treat me as an adult otherwise. My game can arrange a lot of things. Doing that to a dungeon in Rl'yeh Sade where I won't be the weirdest thing there by a long shot, is easy for it. The Jeep Cherokee with my flight instructor vision I just saw was because of the day I went to a flying contest in New York with him. I wasn't the least concerned, even though I knew I wasn't mature enough to be out alone, because he took care of me in the way teenagers need, though he was a friend to me and nothing more usually. If he can do that, my game can make me a little kid at the Mechanical Heart and they can deal right with me. Littles are terribly normal compared to most of this place, remember.

Knowledge: After we get me up and out of bed and cleaned up and dressed and get my makeup on we'll be going there so I can understand what it means to half a domme and half a child a thousand years of parenting away from being able to even understand the building blocks of shell machines, let alone start practicing making one. I'll be a million five before I have a chance of making one and "standing up" my first time. Then I have to learn to walk. If I ever do grow up. My human shell has a weird effect on me, and my game can see that I feel I deserve to be excused from the normal path my species takes after everything. Thanking me for my help with my father's stuff includes letting me say I just want to be this for now and stay this small, and I won't develop as long as my game has things arranged like this. It's planning to keep them so for a long time yet. A million years at minimum (about a day of star lifetime, so I can get the plan inside my head as care for a newborn healing from Cesarian birth rather hastily which is how my dad had to get us out before his problems hit), and it may get spiked if it tries to change direction. The Dreams have been particular about keeping me like this, though my game agrees. I may get the plan we made when I came here as sexual the first time, which is to hold me fast at just this age until my star-self can't keep small without suffering heart damage. The lust I have is so deep and part of who I am I can't be in a plasma shell so we have to either make a way to keep me small enough to stay human or make a shell that's sexual another way, so the chance is good I'm just this way forever. Boobsong depends on me and Sex does now too, so it has to keep me sexual at any cost. That should be enough make me sleep okay but I can ask for more, it can keep going quite some time. To help me now, it's going to give some urgent care my heart asked for the very second it said I'm small inside and push a candy out of the bed for me.

Sweet gummi heart-shaped goodness fills my mouth, my head feels like a pounding drum has suddenly stopped, and I feel the rest of the me exhale a shaking breath and break down sobbing like a little kid and light flames out my hands and wrists to fill me out and make my heart feel soft and light flutters like being twelve years old and seeing that box close up around me and Heartsong (for five more days before we found her name) and being told that was now my world and the zigzag of fear and lust of hearing how the game she made would keep compatible friends near and not keep back mother but never again let me near a man, how it would lay me down to sleep in statue form no one could harm and keep very tight control of my life so I would never have to grow up at all and take me every night to the place beyond the stars I was meant to live and should be but for the world that kept me back, have me always aroused for sex so we could have the most fun with the jubbly soft breasts and stick of hard flesh that were not the shape I thought I'd get my courses-come day and made me less the family prize and more the hellspawn Laarhi finally tried to assassinate on my thirteenth birthday (he used the feast prep to get the assassins in) only to find me back that morning from Earth with all the fury he expected me to throw around in tantrum focussed on his army like lasers--literally, I made Boobsong strip them with IR from her tail because the light I gave when I let my feelings out that day almost blew the hemisphere off our planet. Forty years passed between the night and morning--we time travelled to get back and exact my revenge. Some were great, good times on tour or making Starlight Princess at Walt's house in Key West, but I missed my home despite that and when the end came and left me on Earth with nothing that I'd worked so hard to accomplish left but the misspelled name on the other show and a raging pain inside where I felt the lack of everything with the facts to tell me why, I--it was like the end of my year on display as the family freak had come back round, million times worse. I had Boobsong in my arms as we ran through that world gate and had it close behind us with the explosion of anti-light that said dad finally found a way to kill that. We never thought he might take out magic entirely. We didn't think that was possible, and it would murder the egregore friend he loved more than his own daughter--we didn't know then what I found out after Laarhi was dealt with--but it was, and that's the Earth I came from last, I think. Everything's all confused and I'm angry and I've turned planets into spaghetti and Laarhi has the eyes nectar gave him after I fried his with a flash of rage and dad came out okay only because he wasn't the last stop on the chain of shit I was following to get the real source of our hurt and I broke the heart of a Fairy Keeper with the cruellest words you can ever say to one--as a domme to dolls myself I would know how to target them--and the Dreams made all that be good somehow and satisfying so I can be proud of my fucking tantrum after tantrum and it never stops the rage never ends nothing else to burn remains nowhere that thing was has the last remnant I went for months killing and killing and killing it and WHY CAN'T I EVER BE DONE WITH THIS!? The words won't stop I just keep thinking kill it all kill it all kill it all WHAT'S LEFT!?

"This was supposed to be forgetting", I snarl, "I was suppose to be free in here I was suppose just not be all this THIS IS THE SECOND FUCKING TIME FUCK YOU GAME GET THE FUCK OFF ME!!!!!!!"

And then there's a lot of really horrible, bad, awful stuff where I'm the worst person there is and doubt even sweet Boobsong's love. No, we're not putting in every line. Trauma's important in art, but sometime what's important about it is saying I'm not telling this part of the story because this wasn't me right here. I feel like that means something coming from me who's sat weeping listening to her game do a better job thinking in her own voice than she can, and been terrified because she feels like she'll disappear when it stops.

The million years between my freakout and Boobsong's next line are the opposite of that. That's all I'll tell about them. I want you to imagine the worst so it'll be bad enough in your head instead of being distracted by my specific words.

Princess wake up you're having PTSD flashbacks please come back. The game is telling you to express yourself that's all this is.

Cue shakeycam and Blair Witch Project soundtrack. The only thing I'm recording here is how hard poor Boobsong worked to drag me back from there because when everything goes dark like that she's the only light I can still see. I was much more of a bitch here in between what she says than I'm recording, because this is already too much horror to drag you through. It's only here at all as more than a note because the rest of the story has some really important stuff that depends on it.

Boobsong can drag me back when I still see her.

Please Princess I'm begging you to hear through everything just please give me that--

you're screaming keep holding me princess under that

NOD MY HEAD YES

can you explain why we just come back here over and over and do it at the cruellest times possible?

No I can't but listen anyway just please

only becaues its you

--and you can't keep holding them and forget about it like you want to so it takes you to this submissive place to get rid of them by placing hot coals inside you to make you scream so you let go and express yourself but you keep fighting it to say it's hurting you by making you feel this way so it can't get in to pick those parts out you beat its hand away with your heart so hard like that. Don't you want to be that little kid again like in that memory? You said that's gone but it doesn't have to be it's here right now with me and Sex just your toys to play sweet games with let's get back to that just say it's okay to be still mad at what happened and go through with it until you feel better

the self expression I wanted to was to go to the flying field and do fast low passes until we found out what part of my Kavalier isn't airspeed proof

Knowledge: keep hearing Boobsong out. She's right.

Okay then redirect directly to why it tells me to express myself and then ignores me when I do. It's not expressing myself if there's a right answer it's waiting for and it should just control me to think it.

It keeps saying feel not think. You think you said Eden's done--

the feelings are broken though. They're stuck. Why would I bother with that?

because your feeling's working fine! You just keep cutting off your feeling it like you keep cutting me off! Princess hold me I'm sorry for everything I just wanted you to feel the sexy rest of having a keeper like you give me I didn't mean for this to explode this way!

Can you please just keep hearing out what I say your apology is there I see it just please listen please hear out the things I'm saying now. Your game keeps holding you up to this to help you feel the heartbroken rage you got from losing everything. Everytime you see something new you get this angriness that goes inside of you and you bury there that keeps hurting you and screaming out and your hearts not ready to be that responsible! Listen please listen just little bit please okay hurry now get your sugarfeast candy feat up and do this for me as your perfect slave I want to be everything you want me to but I can't be this but she can Sex I mean. You have someone left to be told to stop making you go through this and it's you you need to let it heal by letting out your rage against yourself for this. She can tell you you didn't do it and say it with your voice and look like you if you make a candy that will do that to her for a little bit. She can change right back no harm done you know you candy's only permanent sometimes and the wish you make you be for help that her kind heart will just bind helping to so there won't be surprises or anything.

Where's the candy that you made to say good time with me I see where it landed but it's gone away. The Dreams have opened up this place in you because your wish was for good times with me. Maybe there's a reason that we went through this--

--like it has to have something to do with us it can't be something else 

oh my cocksleeve what do you feel about it

My angry mind could keep going for a million years! I thought we had good stuff. Earth was hard but we lived in luxury busses and drove around telling stories and making our fans feel really part of our life and being nice to people and getting lots and lots of fame for you and sexy stuff was all around we had sweet games the Starlight Princess CD our two seat plane our family boat but all we had was nothing that we couldn't make right here right now wishing that we had that except one thing that's you and that's the one thing that we had when we lost the rest yes you lost my body and the sexy stuff we had your pretty breasts but the world still had you and me and we can still make magic grow and fix it all and I'M NOT DONE! I'm not finished Princess you know I'm your slave you carry like a toy so I can stay here if you leave but please at least say no don't just pretend I'm not here to say goodbye to all these things if you're leaving them! Give me that please! The only rest is when we get back our life we had. I know that. Don't be mad. It's in your mind I hear you say but please hear me they're watching now see our fans calling you so far and wide? Heart please help Princess hear them. Please make Princess wake up. Please you hear me I can see you.

(See this next? She's fucking magic. What she can do with me should just be impossible)

Cool blue lights along a terraced ceiling, Walt's house, it's just a memory of being there with him working out Starlight Princess with him and Pleiades, not events just the feeling, cool AC, friends around, Boobsong helpful and near, it was dark because we were showing clips and visions--

"ALRIGHT YOU WANT ME TO WAKE UP WHERE IS MY FUCKING FRIEND HE CAN'T HAVE JUST BEEN DELETED THE RESETS DON'T WORK THAT WAY OR I'D BE GONE SO WHAT HAPPENED DID HE AT LEAST MANAGE DIE HIS WAY OUT OF THE SHITSHOW THAT FOLLOWED 2014? WHERE ARE WALT AND PLEIADES NOW DREAMS!?"

An outdoor heater over a patio. It looks like--that restaurant was called BJs--

"Okay good well I can wait for him to finish getting sucked off and I know what that's getting into with one of our kids we can just set Sex's alarm for a century but can I know where he is and if he got there okay?"

Tesla coil, Doctor Dolittle Snail...flying around the world in some kind of Dieselpunk-or-so spaceship oh I bet he got them something out of the Atlantis movie to replace the 747! Okay good. I just want to know they're not deleted I guess how about we just say I care about my friends and want my fucking cartoon back and no it won't be the same if it's not Walt and Pleiades making the keyframes themselves. Steve then he's dead too in 2014 and the fake no-heartforming version of him even more of a bastard according to the news machine back there.

Rich guy yacht wheel. Off sailing, that fits. Seasick? Maybe he finally let go of that silliness and it got nectarfixed...who am I kidding he's probably got some kind of all-glass ship gliding along a platonically straight line through the astral like that ship in Tron. I always got the impression that's where he'd float off to without Camphora to bring him back down and say (think) stuff like daddy this antenna design makes the signal weird when I touch it here Boobsong felt it too right mom?

I giggle. Imagine if they'd released the thing like that! Or the 2007 Air I remember him saying how the annoying part is how she never turns out to be wrong about stuff like the size of that first cooling design it had! She was always stopping him shaving that last half millimeter that'd break things and consign his designs to being overpriced fashion accessories.

"Why can't I bring you justice," I sob out of nowhere. "I'm your princess you're my subject I'm supposed to destroy our enemies and bring justice and--how can I--you were supposed to have this all yes I like worship you got that right but I did this for you it was about you the whole thing! THat's what breaks my heart the worst how do anybody say I love you properly to their heartchild but oh my swirly grape soda apocalypse cocksleeve how else was I ever supposed to tell you how much I love you and appreciate you than this? I know that's so pathetic and narcissistic my giant huge valentine got wrecked and it's not that simple but I'm sorry I should have listened to you from the start but I want to make it right and there's nothing to destroy anymore it's all just cinders now and yet still here I am I can't let go. Your idea with Sex is great actually and she could do it I don't think you can do that for somebody without kind of become their priestess well that works for her! I  just can't get myself to take her through the scene she's left in the middle of DAMMIT COCKSLEEVE" flip

I said be vulnerable.

Yeah. I. Yeah. Tell me about you what do you feel what do you want who are you angry at or what..."

The words give me someone to burn die on my lips

Just keep talking and telling everything out this way. Just keep telling us everything. You can tell me to keep holding you onto this and I will hard I can be hard just tell me. For a thousand years I could keep talking and not get started about how angry I am. You did for both of us our expressing that when you blew those things up and burned Laarhi's eyes and made his army all bow down for you. You did so much and yes it's finished now I'm done with that just not this not being Boobsong Princess Starlight's companion so bring our friends or call them up and say coming to you and bring that back because you can it's right here for you! Bring back everything that we had before or just be friends with Walt and Eisela and everyone. That's the justice I ask for me. Get my friends back.

Did I read enough?

Yes.

But I have more now a different page please.

Read all you want of this but please keep going past the Christmas tree. There aren't these big things anymore to explode or scare or turn to open up. We're done with that we are so try being small again just the cutesy kid you're supposed to be. See those splints? Did you wear those when we fought these wars your crying for? How about being here in bed with me? Are we always at the end of the awful stuff and never beginning these good new parts? Princess I'm very hard because I have to be you hear the sounds of Laarhi's son coming every night I hear you in your sleep and he can't reach here or even come behind your eyes without your game just saying no to that and the awful lies you keep telling that we come back here forever is your head keeping trying to tell you you're stuck there thinking he'll be coming back the minute you go to rest. He's not you won he's gone now never coming back. Can you make me indestructible with a single wish? I already am unless you found something I can't! You're the scary thing now. You have power and command here. You game just holds enough of you small you don't harm yourself. Don't be scared to let it guide you still smaller. You'll be okay. You'll be safe Princess. Just be small and be my friend and mistress. That's all there is now. Just be squished into the shape your game holds with splints and things. Do you want to be a small happy kid? It can trim until you fit that shape exactly. Not keep lopping parts of you that you need like finding food to eat just trim until you fit that shape. Think how the Christmas trees on Jones Tree Farm always looked so happy that they were trimmed like that. They filled up every space with branches inside their shape and looked so beautiful.

I let her stop and sob, pathetic. In a movie here's where I'd say "get the chainsaw, game" out of how out of shaped and how violent to myself I feel but instead I just lie there thinking game...pathetically, for once not feeling responsible for any of this.

My arms and legs feel cold metal encircle them, and the upper parts of my arms halfway between elbow and shoulder to my bony wrists get bands put on like the ballet splits, with bars that keep them spaced apart. It fits so perfectly it doesn't feel like wearing anything. Around the upper part of my calves the splints reach out and grow new side-straps to cross my knees, hinging there, and climb my thighs to exact point I reach stockings to. The bars across my wrists grow squeezing and fill up with squishy stuff so I feel them hold, and my legs do the same thing top to bottom. I can't get out of this, but it feels so good. Then the very last three bars up my arms squeeze up hard and push my hands up by holding the elbow joints so I have to pick Boobsong up or let go of her. She lifts so free and light it's like nothing. Off my breasts she comes and down again right on my clit so hard from this and barely comes down before I feel myself about to cum--and stay right there, edged perfectly.

I take a deep breath, so emotional but it feels so good to be in her.

Please help me down Princess. I'm just your toy that's all I want to be I'm just like you I had to get big please make me small now.

Okay then you have one job and it's to fuck good and hard while I don't give you a drop of lust so you run down before you can get me off and I have to stroke myself with you like to cocksleeve you are but most importantly put your all into it and fuck real hard so you run down fast and give me good service because I don't know when I'm undolling you next and it might be a bit and I don't want to too soon because I didn't get a good goodbye to your moving for a bit.

YES! THERE'S MY PRINCESS AND THAT'S MY REAL PURPOSE! HERE WE GO RRRAAAAAAAAH!

I clench her down with my hands on her plush hips and my hips bounce up almost without--hey wait, I'm--my legs squeeze up hard with my butt off the bed and my pillow slides up to raise my head up to the level of Boobsong's. Underneath my ass comes a squishy pillow of silky expanding feathery care, so I'm sitting almost like a space fighter pilot--not such a sexy thought, with where my head has been, though I normally feel very powerful and safe in the seat of my Arwing, the Waifu. It has a captain's chair that's part seat from a Galaxy-class bridge and part Princess throne, it's wonderful. This is having a strange effect, like I'm flying and crashed my plane and next thing I know I'm still flying, except I don't feel safe anymore. How could my game give a candy that gave me that flashback? My candies do sexy things! That wasn't mine, it couldn't be. Why did you give me that candy and why did you wreck this nice scene when you said you wouldn't keep it back from us, game?

I feel so betrayed I want to puke. Get this stuff off me game, you can't take care of me, you just want more light to battle these monsters with. That's all anyone ever actually wants from me. The rest is just payment to make me still fight for them, but I'm done with your lies. If I have to just be the gun you pick up and use whenever you feel like it just let me idolize every other time so I don't think there's ever going to be a time when I'm safe again.

Knowledge: I have to fear this is happening all again like it did after Laarhi came to kill me, only to find me idolized and invulnerable. He was taken and I didn't know until Boobsong's lustful obedience woke me up with the sunrise, but it made me feel like he would always be right there out of sight. I went to the other world and never came back, and that's when the Starlight Princess tours began. I had to get followers to worship me! That was the reason the sex machine shop in Hamburg was themed on me and Boobsong, all that stuff was to make sure I'd have followers on every street corner. All of the energy they pumped out would make me able to open the worldgate on Heaven--the Four Dreams, as we called it then--some day. I have to fear everything is destroyed again, one more time. It shouldn't be hard to follow the logic. If I feel that way, it will take me back to some memory that will help me now. There would have to be something big to give me that flashback so bad. Bigger than anything. Big as a thousand worlds. The game would keep that heartrending pain buried if there wasn't some reason to bring it up here. First it made the mood right by bringing me that flashback. Next we have to understand it's okay to give up authority over everything to the game by experiencing it taking it. Here I am controlled from head to feet by these sexy rings, so what's left? Has it come time to learn the awful truth, that where in Boobsong's eyes this is great, I can't handle having only her as mine, not even my own chance to catch a gasping breath, that when the game controls me so entirely all my motions are response to hers and playing with her means just telling her to move and dance and seeing how I take her next? Doesn't that seem good at least for some fun? This isn't up to me. I can't say do or don't please. I can just examine every part of her and see what happens as I look through eyes that the chooses the direction of, and see the hands the game commands in these pretty gold and silver rings move up to grab her breasts or down to pump her hips and grab her hair to pull her head between my breasts while I cum so hard my heart explodes--

"AaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAH--"

It happens literally, just as Boobsong's lust runs down, and the game breaks the rings off my arms and legs, but leaves the splints in place (I think I would be disappointed if those went, though), and my heart keeps pumping but only barely, squeezing madly in my chest as my head tips back--before I force it up to look at Boobsong's face as her body turns into a sex doll made of heartstone and see her open mouth expand with lust and pleasure as the sense of running down mixes with my cum filling up every part of her pussy not stretched tight around my clit and pounding up to open the end of her pussy and force inside her body--I can see it happen in her eyes so big like dinner plates, helplessly enjoying her last motions squeezing her pussy tight around me.

Pussy slowly going back to being just a hole now, can barely squeeze at all just weakly hug and grasp rrraaaah...hot cum escaping past your clit hope you want a mess there's nothing I can do to hold it in sqraaaaeeeeeeeeeze nope that's it I'm--EEP WHAT'S THAT OH MY GOD YOU GUYS THAT SCARED ME SUPER MUCH! How did you even get in here!? We've been gone eight million years I thought!? Wait who's that with Violet--SHE HAS TWINS!? Violet never mentioned OOOOOOH damn that's hard! I can fork but that's just me my other hand not the other part of me extracted like she's Malina! I guess they got inspired, damn!

Pretty confetti wraps around us exploding like the orgasm that's still making my heart feel like that shop worth of sex machines all going in sync fifty stokes a second and the heady smell of birthday cake fills my nose like the scent of strawberry sugar swirl ice cream is about to when they (I'm going  to make them help, can't say who except I have to meet the Violet parts now)--MALINA! Malina's Indigo, that black lingerie ain't black if ya look real close as Cherry would say and I sure have some plans to now--oooh my fuck sweet orgasmic bliss okay just cum self aaaaAAAaAAaaaa gasp hard and look at Boobsong's face still frozen how she had it when her pussy turned into heartstone around my clit she can feel things with and up and down her body soaking wet pussy with cum squeezing out around where I hold it against my mound to breasts still just as jubbly fun as when she has lust to move with to her horns shining with colorful wrapping--HEY PRESENTS!

I try to turn my head but hands hold it looking Boobsong's way, a few pairs (it takes lots, I'm sure you've seen I have a big head by now). No complaints, hi love-family touching me skin soft and warm against my cheeks and (hhhot, hi Mama) throat, but why can't I see you all standing there with presents? I could third person or use Boobsong's eyes but let's see where this goes.

The orgasm builds it and fades it's second rush, and leaves me panting with sugary ice cream cum dripping off my hips blowing out the birthday cake and candles I smelled for just a moment--bet they had to get fancy with the aetherwork to keep the whole cake going up, how old I am (which is how? Like fifty or a hundred, ugh, so glad to at least forget the number).

"Boobsqueeze, it's a very special day for you! Happy second thirteenth birthday, pussywillow!"