26 - Take My Hand

The fifth system is the transformation system. It can transform my body with permanent or temporary shapeshifting to turn me into things like the Top Priority Goals I saw listed rewards that would reshape my body. It can turn me into a mermaid or birdgirl, if that would help the game play me, and shrink and expand some or all of me, but I can't say what I want it to do, the game has to decide it, without taking requests.

The game carries me through processing about losing my skills. Gently and carefully it lets me think about how far it can take just keeping me from using them--that will stunt any growth, but it's not possible for them to decay, so I won't be losing them totally.

The game tells me I'm mistaken, silly, and that's fine. I don't need to be right, and sometimes I shouldn't be, so it let me feel very confident before telling me I was wrong to show me even though I stupidly expected to have found something Lyra's superintelligence missed, it's okay and even calling me stupid doesn't make the game any less likely to care for me, and that being smart doesn't mean I become more of a person, or that being stupid makes me less. Lyra is much dumber than me, and she's definitely a person, and the game knows I'll take an abstract sword and fight people who say otherwise, so why not think about me the same way?

Lyra's superintelligence made her very very sad and she hated it. She missed being my silly little cocksleeve every second she was making this gift for me and she didn't mind, but she put this part in to make sure I could see how just getting bigger and smarter and more complicated forever isn't the way to be happy for everyone, it's not the way for her, and she and my seed-ghost agree it won't be the way for me. I'm still going to be clever and have much better spatial and logical reasoning than almost every human even here in the Four Dreams, and be wise and emotionally intelligent, but I'm already bigger than the size I'd be happiest at so I'm going to be slightly smaller than now. It's not going to hurt or even be uncomfortable, but the game isn't giving me a choice either, so she didn't want me to panic to see my skills slipping away. It won't make me too dumb to enjoy things like Legos and Star Trek, just keep me from carrying so many burdens.

The game says I'll feel better once it starts happening and I can see how it changes me, so it's not going to let my mind dwell on this, but yes it can make me forget skills. It's not like episodic memory, which just adds more memory if you keep writing new ones. Skills change as you use them, and if I use a skill wrong in a very precise way after not be able to use it for a very long time, the game can erase it from me. That's how the skill of using a calendar is going away now.

The game lets my mind free.

My eyes can't water, my heart beats the steady pace of a statue, my motionless lungs can't gasp, mouthful of cum or not I can't cry out, but inside I--

Slippery pressing warmth squeeze my cock, there's a sense of sliding, and--

QUICK GODDESS!!

Somehow I understand what's happening, even as the sudden motion after so long just soaking in her pussy makes me cum, and slam the order into her, a barely-formed thought, and her hands leap out of mine--

GRAB GODDESS COCK QUICK!

SPIKES TOO LATE HHAAAAH

In my rush I've leapt to give her an order with no free will in it, the better to respond quickly, but now before I get the chance to stop her her urgent pursuit of my free-sliding cock that's somehow fallen right through the harness to shoot out of her and thump on the table frees the cum in our kiss to erupt over both of us, covering both our faces and chests.

NNN HAHH CAUGHT

Spikes why can't it go back in what the spike wait the harness is still on me why???

Mommy I can't put it back! Nil!

I almost tell her to forget it and focus on what surely must be leaking out of her, but--no time.

My mouth then! Just keep it there until I'm done and do your best to keep yourself from leaking!

Fuck okay stuff...raah mouth open please game?

Masturbatory, Lyra-flavored weird joy touches my lips as she maneuvers it awkwardly, one handed, the other clutching her cunt to control the damage, and my lips move to accept my own cock a few inches, just enough for Lyra's urgency to push it to fill my mouth and press back my tongue, spurting hot cum against it, the pressure pulsing in my mouth.

I don't even get to suck myself off!? My lips can't even clamp, but Lyra seems either knowledgable or desperate enough to hold a pleasant pressure as I throb, face burning, cum dripping down me, swallowing both my own load and that first real look at what it is I'm caught in, filling with the stretching pressure of both inside me until it seems I'll burst--how much is there?

But, and I mean this to both things, it's terrifying, and crushingly humiliating in the inexorable helpless washing-away of what I thought I was supposed to become, and it feels, somehow, paradoxically, overwhelmingly, impossibly wonderful, freeing and steeping and held by, love.

"Have you two been holding that cum inside yourselves this whole time!?"

All I can do is gaze at Lyra sweetly holding my cock for me, forcing me to drink myself, but she glances toward the door as Rada's voice sounds.

This will be interesting...

"I'm sorry Rada it fell out and the harness was still on me somehow it's my fault--"

Hey! Not your call, cocksleeve! Tell Rada now.

I barely manage the dreamtalk through my weirdest orgasm yet, but if I can't even fucking promise to meet someone for coffee we're going to at least keep this lack of personal agency thing consistent.

EEP MOMMY I--

It feels so good, though, like flying--

Aaah tell Rada!

"I mean Rada it slipped out through my GOddess' harness I'm wearing and I do feel bad but I'm just my Goddess' cocksleeve and I can't say sorry that's not my call but when she can talk again my Goddess might say it or not?"

I still like your...present, it just showed me...our relationship.

Finally I've subsided enough to think. The game even swallows for me--good--so I know I won't make a further mess, though I can feel the hot column of it through me stretching my--cavity? Throat?

The game moves my tongue and mouth to show me how to expertly, lovingly, suck and lick the last dregs out of a cumming cock, and, so help me the actual flesh is worlds better than Rada's silicone and it's not just because I'm also getting the benefits of my practice.

If I'm doing this game make me look and sound like it's going to make me cum all over again.

"MMmmmmfh...mmm..."

The breathy moan is exactly what I was thinking of. Hopefully it's working my face as skillfully as it feels like, and making me look as r--clutchslip--sexy-feeling as it seems.

Somehow I actually am enjoying this but even so there's some kind of backward nerve thing that makes being puppeted to wear the expression cause me to feel what it claims more brightly...and I have no doubt the game has thought of that.

"How did it manage to get out without you taking it off? That's what you've been wearing this whole time, yeah?"

Nod yes

Blushy humiliating I'm a cumtree...

"Well, I mounted her cock to the harness in the first place and did my binding right and checked it and if my strap fell free without coming off you I bet you got spiked. I was planning to pressure you when I came back so it's probably my fault."

Control of my body fades in, I crack my stiff knuckles and move my hands, go to take my cock from Lyra--and my clutch spins free.

Huh? If my cock doesn't count as a toy, nobody's does, and I've misunderstood this whole thing.

Goddess your cock is a toy yes and so are you but you must not be planning to use it like a toy.

I stare at her, still obediently holding it to my lips, feeling a freakish cold excitement pour through me. Somehow, I manage to give myself a parting kiss and pull away.

Cum drips in my eyes, I wipe it away--slip--no I don't.

Fuck.

The game kept telling me. It kept warning me I wasn't understanding. Can I even--

Something else, just as impossible as the rest, comes to my awareness as I brace myself to see if I can move my own chair: Rada's stockings and thong and garters are, somehow, unscathed: cum is all over me, and Lyra, and the table, but none of it has gotten that far down. There's quite a mess, but nothing like eight gallons around (except, possibly, inside of me, oof--but it feels like being full of something my body is, least of my worries right now made to be full of...).

If I move, I'm likely to change that, but if I stay put we can clean this up without me exploring sex work any further at the moment.

Which almost makes me try moving, but, that would be too much to face right now.

I sit there, breathing hard, perfectly able to talk, but not making a sound. I don't know what expression my face has, I think it's lustful-and-, but...

Rada is presenting us with a stack of rainbow-stripes towels, face out of my--right. I almost expect to have even this fail, but yes, I can turn to see that her face is kind.

Good idea but--please see me little one, see what I'm doing but can't find the...the...can't turn into a direct intentional order because I'm desperate no to need to...look at my hands...

Goddess yes I'm listening keep going you can do it!

This isn't playing exactly, but...please, have some mercy...trembling, heart pounding, I reach for Lyra's hand where she's holding my cock against herself, dripping cum.

My hand rises toward her.

Shift your cock in my arm keep my cunt still closed so full reach down and take your hand rraah!

Goddess you can always reach for me that's always allowed.

I clutch her slick fingers with desperate strength, and burst into tears.

There's motion, then soft terrycloth tenderly patting our clutching hands, and Rada moves up my arm, working gently.

"Take a breath, you're turning blue."

Oh. Right. I gasp, then manage proper breath. I seem to be done sobbing, though I think.

She's working her way up my arm, towards my head.

"Thanks."

You're still full, right?

Yes I have to hold my cunt or I'll pour out and it keeps trying to get up my throat but I can swallow it back so I really really want to Goddess omifuck but I just can't fit any more at all.

The situation should...Rada is being so...the game isn't moving mentally or physically...stop, self!

This must be the game having rewired me, but somehow I know it's not. 

Well, it is one way.

Lyra's just so tasty...I size her up.

"How much do you think would leak if you let it, snuggly?"

I say it out loud, specifically for Rada's benefit.

Lyra will have produced rivers of her own nectar, too, it's dripped down her thighs, but most of it still has to be inside her, which means...

Goddess did you want me to answer out loud too.

Yes.

"I think maybe like a half gallon, Goddess? I'm just your cocksleeve though I could be wrong it could be like tons!"

No. I won't. There has to be a limit somewhere. Even for me. Even now.

Even if it's just my own internal volume.

I don't know what Rada's reaction to this is--she's gently, patiently patting me off, and I daren't turn to her and see, not leash because she's partly working on my hair right now.

And half a gallon feels possible, and the rewards--from my tastebuds, audience, and the game if it has any sense of fun at all, will be worth it.

"Rada, thank you so much. Do you have a bowl I could borrow? Like, a really wide one?"

"Why don't you just wish it from the Four?"

Well that sounds like a thing that would have been useful to know about!

Goddess it couldn't have helped us though what could you have wished for to help us?

Point.

"That sounds awesome, how do we do it?"

"It's the easiest part of being in the Four Dreams. Just say 'Dreams, I wish you would give me a big wide bowl to catch my seedling's cum in' and they'll either give you what you asked, probably not exactly because they know how to make you happier, or they might not grant the wish at all in which case they always say why."

"Mommy try wishing to be given a safeword for my gift?"

"I..."

She's right though. I have to try it. I have to fight or I won't...it's like it won't be real unless it defeats me and there's no rescue.

I try, without perturbing Rada's careful ministration, to address the fabric of reality at large.

"Dreams, I wish you'd give me a safeword for this game I'm stuck in."

Visions, cartoonishly sweet stained glass, pass before my eyes: myself, trapped in stylized green tentacles as lipstick draws a mark on my cheek, and then a titanically huge, kindly faced, eldritch Space-Trilogy-Worthy Lyra towers over this vision like it's a doll, forms something around it, my stained-glass avatar is now encased in purply glass, and she sets me down, and the visions fade to my female face looking younger that even I have the impression it does now, laying on my side, eyes shut, cradles in a pale grey pillow, utterly, utterly peaceful.

These pass, and I come back to reality feeling somehow more settled, and nothing changes. I try to wipe my face again to be sure, and it simply does nothing.

That's it then.

"Dreams, I wish for a nice wide bowl to catch my seedling's cum with."

It appears, wide and low, what looks like monocrystalline quartz, out of thin air, right in front of me.

Yes this would have been useful earlier.

I unthinkingly reach to push it--I can do that? No of course, this is definitely playtime! Rada's finished, still standing beside me, so I twist to give her an big stupid slutty "Thank you, that's so much better!" and without waiting for a reply turn back to Lyra and with a wicked grin shove the bowl towards her with both hands and a lot of cleavage.

It's plenty wide enough for her impish size to kneel in.

"Get in that and take the harness off."

Ok ccccaaaarefully step in and kneel...squish my butt down this is so humiliating...ulp here goes hand off harness and cunt....spooooge unf okay where buckles rraah tight POP one POP two POP thee place harness on table cum still everywhere gah haaaah cum falling out of me so slippery eep stay up wow its up to my KNEES!?

"Okay, out, and hand me the bowl, if you can lift it."

Stand up, take my foot out slow, drip...Rada's table slippery...

She'll be covered in goo, but so is the table, still.

Time for another moment of truth. I brace to pull my chair forward, to squidge myself right up against the table and stop any spills getting down to my lingerie. Almost surprisingly, even almost disappointingly, it works. I scoot up to the table and make ready to take the bowl.

Rada moves from my side to sit on a bench at the side of the table, props herself on her elbows to watch with raunchy amusement. I get the impression she doesn't think I can do this, which gives me a wicked idea.

Tail help keep cock from falling....RRRrrrraaaaah lift up the bowl...eeep falling help...

Kinky fairy princesses first, though--Lyra starts to slip and I grab the heavy bowl out of her hands, surprised again at my strength (but then, all this had made me feel so weak, which is one reason I'm doing this), and without hesitation because hesitation will become my loss of nerve and end everyone's fun, bring it to my lips and take a big pull.

It's more nectar than cum, a concoction of swirling iri--slip--swirly-shiny colors and demonflesh wrapped around my has-to-be-supernaturally-sweet cum, creamy thicker swirls. Far from being a challenge, it's delicious, and I coo appreciatively as I chug.

...creamy. Now there is an idea.

Game, milk dispensing option I'm thinking about. Possible?

Yes, it says.

Great. Prepare and hold action, for my signal.

We haven't quite taken this all the way yet--don't spill my scheme, little one.

Bwaha I know what you're going to do!

I pull the bowl away from my lips, give an appreciative smack, and glance nonchalantly at Rada, who's watching me with a "this is adorable" grin.

"Triple dog dare you to try some," I say as sweetly as I can.

Why am I like this.

Because it's fun.

"Yes please! Why do you think I sat down here?"

Drat, but it brings a silly grin to my face anyway.

OMIFUCK I'm so drippy cocksleeve can't believe I had enough for both of you inside me.

Her reaction makes me realize I want the first batch of my milk to be Lyra's--well, but it's been a while. Surely...?

I hand Rada the bowl with another big stupid smile, and she takes it, immediately raises it.

Game, cancel previous. Is your transformation system or whatever able to tell if I have milk yet without me trying to get it?

Knowledge: Yes, and yes.

Still ssh, you.

Yes quiet bwaha I bet she just wants to milk you though..

Now this has got to constitute playing with a toy. I nonchalantly start to feel myself up--and nothing happens, and I blush deeply.

Not mine to give.

"I don't get it," I blurt as Rada slurps contentedly, "I can give you my cum, but not my milk?"

She passes back the bowl, and almost unthinking I take it to--slipfuck. But...no, it makes sense, Rada's changed the scene from "try and shock the captain who probably does this twice a day" to "drink with new playmates", and that's not playing with a toy anymore.

"Um...hang on..."

Cocksleeve--

Yes Goddess isn't being naked so good and you don't have to explain what you want see?

Shift cock to crook of elbow, take bowl for Goddess, tippy set it down.

"Good cocksleeve. This is...I'm like a doll..."

Rada smiles broadly.

"I think she really found the right present for you. The reason you can share the bowl but not your milk is the nectar-cum isn't yours now--you gave it away to your seedling cumming inside her, and it came back out of her transformed, and so instead of being of you which isn't yours to share, it's of her which is definitely yours to share."

Is there a significant look at the end, there, am I paranoid, or am I just hoping for the incitement to try something interesting?

"So do I! This is just so...help yourself there..."

I nod to the bowl as I trail off. Rada's reasoning makes sense, but it feels like it's too easy a workaround if she's right, and there's another possibility.

I gaze down at my cleavage, crook a lip and my big pink nipples and nice areolas. They've been looking gorgeous every time I look down, no-one's manage to grope them yet somehow, and after the last adventure they have that ache of a body part you've been told not to touch.

I am, I'll be the first to agree, totally hot. Sure, then, groping myself with nothing in my mind but the thought of how great it will feel to get my hands on this amazing rack, that would be playing with a toy? Two especially nice toys, with sweet red nipples getting harder as I obj--um, ogle, myself this way.

I go for it. Nothing happens, and every inch of my body suddenly prickles to be touched, and I glance to Lyra.

"Goddess why would the game let you masturbate when you can use me for that? You can always have me I'm always here to be your cocksleeve and I'll do everything you want just like you want it and yes I know you depend on me and that means I have a responsibility to you and never can say no I won't be your cocksleeve ever no matter what I'm bound to you now to be your cocksleeve in place of the agency the game took away from you."

"I just wanted to make you the best present I could Goddess, did I go too far?"

The thing is, even as frustration crawls at me, there's a smooth rushing freedom every time I can't do something that leaves me almost disappointed when I can--except for the af--slip--c--slip--way I know I'm being playful enough that feels so good when I find something I can do.

Knowledge arrives: I can ask other people to help me, not just Lyra.

I know that but--the poor thing deserves an answer, even if she can see me spin to process this all.

It comes to me as I ask it that this is my longest streak so far of not just being effectively puppeted, and I want it to continue, so I resolve to do some stuff the game will like to see me do on my own if it lets me have control back after this, such as make enthusiastic use of what it just told me.

Game, make me answer her so she knows what I honestly say and that I mean it.

When the game softly slips an Order into my mind, I make sure the whole room sees it happen.

"Cocksleeve, you took the biggest most terrifying risk any submissive could possibly take, even after you thought it would lock us together as if we could get any more inseparable. I'm impressed with you, and you deserve a reward. Good fucktoy."

The deserve a reward vs. are getting one isn't lost on me.

Snif. Sob..

I'M SO RELIEVED MOMMY I've been saying she likes it she likes it she likes it but even with you being naked hearing you say that even if the game way controlling you you did say to say what you mean IT MEANS SO MUCH FOR YOU TO TELL ME THAT!!

She's sitting slave-posed, eyes down, still covered in cum, right in the middle of the table, looking adorable.

Think you have some more space inside now?

Yes Goddess you let enough out that I could swallow the rest of what got spilled on the table and on me.

I see you know where I'm heading.

"Rada, your table's clean as your deck, no doubt?"

"It had better be or you won't be my only spanking today."

"Get licking, cocksleeve, and then when you finish and the table and you and my cock are all nice and clean and you won't mess up my lingerie you're going to come sit in my lap and put my cock away in my purse and show me your groping skills and get held."

Slurp YUS start with your cock it smells the best mmmhhh cooooock....

Panting a little with the joy of Lyra's two-fisted cleanup of my member, I decide to try it silently: Dreams, I wish for a glass my cocksleeve can manage to dip me up glasses of nectarcum.

I'm not bailing out, game, don't worry.

In front of me, glistening precedes glass like a stemware Cheshire cat appearing, and a big, curvaceous crystal wine goblet materializes, which I spend a moment enjoying the futility of trying various ways to interact with before gulping and turning to Rada--then pause.

Game, I can't just ask this flat. That would be so boring! What am I now? I feel it can't but figure out how say it.

The game puppets my thoughts through the answer: I'm in such a tight collar.

This could not possibly be any more precisely targeted to p--spin--make me mad grr!

I might love this, and I might be very glad I'm already trapped, but I am not beating Lyra to being collared, not after all she's gone through to get here!

Alternate answer for Rada, game, and then I need to figure out what I even can do. Can I throw together a good ceremony with a four-hour time-horizon?